Cream lace mini dress, at a wedding…

[SummaLuvin]

I went to a gay (men) wedding recently and noticed a woman there wearing this dress. She looked really fabulous in it. But is it acceptable to wear this to a wedding? Even one with no bride?
https://www.harveynichols.com/self-portrait/crystal-embellished-lace-mini-dress-958059-crem-cream-157633/

How? Both dresses are fabulous dresses. I can't see any reason why the cream lace mini dress was "inappropriate" or "attention seeking"

To me it looks like an adult has put on a little girl's dress.
I think it would look so much more elegant just below the knee.
It's clearly not going to upstage anyone so I think it's fine for a wedding.

Really?

The colour, the lacy material, and the short length.

The orange dress is completely different.

The idea is to make an effort, wear something nice, but not in bridal colours and not too revealing.

I’m really shocked some folks think there is a made up rule on length and this is too short. I’m sure neither of the grooms objected. Who sits and makes up these stuffy rules? But more than that. Posts them like they are a thing 😂

There is no bride!

Yeah we aren't thick. Doesn't mean you should wear bridal colours though.

There wasn't a bride at this wedding. Do you think guests might have been confused about who was marrying whom?

I'm at a loss for words to reply to that without saying something which would get me deleted.

I think often the "rules" for weddings come from the fact many weddings are in religious settings. The church wedding I went to where the mother of the bride wore a Chanel style skirt suit (except the skirt was a bum skimming mini), stiletto heels and a spaghetti strap with no bra certainly drew a few intakes of breath - it didn't get much better when she disappeared after the service and reappeared at the reception in a virtually transparent gold sheath dress - still missing a bra.

My (self imposed) wedding rules are nothing white or lacy, smart, dresses to be knee length or below, no see through or opaque bits and not masses of flesh on show. Your job as a guest is to be smartly turned out, not the centre of attention.

I’ve worn dresses at least that short to a wedding, but then I haven’t been to any wedding in the 1200s.

Unless you're the flower girl, keep looking

A gay wedding between two men? What’s the issue if no bridal dress in cream/ white?

I don't much like it but I think it's fine, wouldn't bother me.

Had it been the sort of venue that held multiple events I might have panicked I walked into the wrong room!!

It's a lovely dress, but to me it does read bridal, the sort I can imagine many brides changing into for the dancing at the reception, or a bride wearing at a registry office. Hence my thread asking if there is no bride is this dress ok - seems like the consensus is that there is no bride to upstage so no worries. For me hemlegnth is no issue unless the ceremony is in a religious building, this wasn't, so my OP was about colour and fabric choice only.

OP I presume you know the couple when attending a wedding so no faux shock on entering a multi event venue. You’re just trying to find a reason to be offended.

@43ontherocksporfavor not sure if you've been to a gay wedding, but a room full of men in suits of varying shades of grey, blue, and brown make the grooms much less immediately identifiable when compared to weddings where a bride in a white dress stands out and catches your eye. So yes, had I walked in a saw this white lacy dress and the grooms were at the back chatting away to other guests - not avidly awaiting my arrival and waving frantically - I might have had a moment where I thought I was in the wrong room. I'm not offended, as I said she looked wonderful, I was simply asking what the etiquette was in the situation as it hadn't crossed my mind before. All well and good to say just ask the grooms, but I also wouldn't want to go to a wedding where tables of other guests quietly thought I was a dickhead even if I did have blessing from the couple.

No, I don't. 🙄

Wearing a white/cream lacy dress as a wedding guest is making a statement, regardless of who's getting married.

You have your opinion and that's fine, but it's hardly outlandish to stick to the traditional norms when choosing what to wear as a guest.

All well and good to say just ask the grooms, but I also wouldn't want to go to a wedding where tables of other guests quietly thought I was a dickhead even if I did have blessing from the couple.

Yep this is another point people seem to be missing.

This is such a funny post.

I thought ‘The Rule’ was created so people would confuse the guest with the bride.
Would that be a concern here?

It doesn't matter if there is no bride. You don't wear white or cream or like it's your wedding unless it is your wedding

That the person is deluded and pretending it's their wedding

An attention seeker.

I think it's perfectly fine.
I don't understand this relatively modern obsession with what guests wear at weddings though.
But I can't see why even those who care about what guests wear could object to a guest wearing a cream dress at a wedding of two men. Why is it a problem?

Why though? I genuinely don't understand why not

The fact that you've posted suggests that YOU are unsure.
If so then don't.