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Original poster

To think wearing, for instance, dresses with a high slit up the side eventually looks desperate?

122 replies

porridgeisbae · 20/12/2023 12:58

I don't think women should have to dress frumpy with age, but at some point a face that's a little older above a revealing dress looks a bit wrong, even on the loveliest figure. Baps out is one thing, but the dresses with a high slit up the side don't look right.

AIBU?

Celebrities might do it on the red carpet but usually they've had lashings of botox, fillers etc.

OP posts:
wildthingsinthenight · 20/12/2023 20:18

OP YABU..and misogynistic..and sexist.
Horrible

villamariavintrapp · 20/12/2023 20:35

Well often skirts that aren't flared or stretchy need slits or the woman won't be able to walk, so they do have practical value. As opposed to dresses with 'baps out' which are probably just aesthetic.. unless the woman is breast feeding? Best to mind your own business really and focus on wearing what you want.

Jf20 · 20/12/2023 20:38

Such a weird creepy little thread though isn’t it. So judgey of older women in a creepy disturbing and misgynistic way. Of how they dress. So insidious. It’s disturbing, and the phrase “baps out” like a teenage boy .

and the word desperate. Desperate for attention in the ops view. Desperate for someone to look at their body apparently.

I wonder if the op is really only 46. Or if she has issues with her own body image or weight. If she wears low cut tops, hence why she apparently thinks it’s acceptable. Does she have issues with other women’s bodies. Is it even a woman posting?

just something weirdly off about this.

Anyfeckinusername · 20/12/2023 20:44

Mmm well I have to say, I’m 49 and I have great legs and great posture. That was my thing. Not boobs, my legs.

ive stopped wearing minis, I’ve really aged frighteningly fast in the past 18 months. I don’t look some ambiguous 40 something hard to pin age. I look Middle Aged. (That autocorrected to Middle Ages 😊) I feel wearing young stuff would contrast my ageing, face and make it stand out!

it was so sudden (the ageing). I swore this wouldn’t happen, but the weight came on. The dry hair arrived. The menopausal skin problems joined the party. Ugh.

I spent four hours in John Lewis three weekends ago looking for the perfect dress to hide me but be office-casual-appropriate. A shaped but shapeless sack. Got there eventually and love it.

legs back in for me these days. Just life.

Brefugee · 20/12/2023 20:47

porridgeisbae · 20/12/2023 12:58

I don't think women should have to dress frumpy with age, but at some point a face that's a little older above a revealing dress looks a bit wrong, even on the loveliest figure. Baps out is one thing, but the dresses with a high slit up the side don't look right.

AIBU?

Celebrities might do it on the red carpet but usually they've had lashings of botox, fillers etc.

Slow handclap for the ageism.

louderthan · 20/12/2023 20:49

OP, you're flashing your internalised misogyny.
I've got great legs. I will wear mini skirts and slit skirts for as long as I want and I don't care if it looks 'desperate', whatever the hell that means.

DuesToTheDirt · 20/12/2023 20:55

Candycurrantbun · 20/12/2023 13:23

So you think women with older faces should cover up their old decrepit bodies? Perhaps they should wear a nice pair of slacks and a polo neck jumper in case they offend your eyes?

Ooh don't, that word "slacks" just gives me the creeps Xmas Grin.

Same with "baps out" mind you, or even just "baps".

IncompleteSenten · 20/12/2023 20:55

I think 'desperate' means woman who does not become invisible as society demands once she reaches a certain age.

ChubbyMorticia · 20/12/2023 20:59

I’m wholeheartedly confused as to why you think women dress for the pleasure of strangers.

SomeoneYouLoved · 20/12/2023 20:59

I'm in my 50's and wear what l feel good in. I am tall and slim, my style of dress is relaxed. Same goes for my hair. I personally wouldn't wear a dress or skirt with a split, it's not my thing but couldn't care less if others do. I think confidence comes from the way you carry yourself, the way you feel about yourself,. your posture etc, not the way you dress.

natura · 20/12/2023 21:02

Trolly trolly troll troll... 👹

Back under your bridge, now - you're ever so boring.

BitOutOfPractice · 20/12/2023 21:05

God what a depressing thread. Again. More women trying to police what other women wear. Judgy misogynistic bollocks.

Aroundthewaygirl · 20/12/2023 21:25

Wow, very ageist. As a matter of fact I just bought a dress with a thigh high slit to wear to a Xmas party. I'm 52 pushing 53 and probably look older than my age, but i'm going to wear it anyway.

Twinklewonderkins · 20/12/2023 22:00

I’m in my 50s and love a slit dress or skirt with fishnets to show my tattoos.

leachesleachesleachesleachesleaches · 20/12/2023 22:14

jay55 · 20/12/2023 13:18

I have terrible legs so am jealous of those who have great ones, I'd wear slits, or slim fit trousers or minis if i could.

Same. I’ll just have to make do with assless chaps instead.

IHaveNeverLivedintheCastle · 20/12/2023 22:28

jay55 · 20/12/2023 13:18

I have terrible legs so am jealous of those who have great ones, I'd wear slits, or slim fit trousers or minis if i could.

But why can't you wear clothes like that if you like them?

MrsApplepants · 21/12/2023 00:32

I wish no one would wear clothes with slits or get out their baps or tats. I don’t want to see more of anyone’s flesh than I have to. I’d like everyone to be covered neck to knee and wrist. That’s everyone, male and female, young, old, whatever
But I am a grumpy misery and in reality everyone should not care what anyone thinks and should wear what they like and I’ll just shut my eyes instead.

Namenumber3 · 21/12/2023 01:37

louderthan · 20/12/2023 20:49

OP, you're flashing your internalised misogyny.
I've got great legs. I will wear mini skirts and slit skirts for as long as I want and I don't care if it looks 'desperate', whatever the hell that means.

Is having “great legs” not showing your internalised misogyny though. Who’s definition of great legs are you using ? Do you mean the sort of long thin legs men like ( which by default become the ones women aspire to)
Are stumpy but strong or fat but fast legs not great too? Would you wear split and mini skirts if your legs weren’t great?

This is a weird thread. I think the second post with the underwear was telling.

Honeychickpea · 21/12/2023 01:47

porridgeisbae · 20/12/2023 12:58

I don't think women should have to dress frumpy with age, but at some point a face that's a little older above a revealing dress looks a bit wrong, even on the loveliest figure. Baps out is one thing, but the dresses with a high slit up the side don't look right.

AIBU?

Celebrities might do it on the red carpet but usually they've had lashings of botox, fillers etc.

To each their own. I think "baps out" looks a lot worse than a slit in a skirt.

GladTidyings · 21/12/2023 02:05

I have amazing boobs and my legs are not my best feature. I never had boobs for years but had great legs as a runner.
Since becoming disabled I’ve put on an awful amount of weight because I can’t exercise effectively enough to impact weight and the drugs I take cause fat retention.
the only thing I feel I can show off is my newly plump baps.
i still wear short skirts or long split skirts because I like them but mostly wear tights with them as I don’t like my bumpy legs.

my medication means my face has aged almost overnight and my hair has thinned.
Everything else feels like an abomination when I look in the mirror because I’m so used to being slim and toned.
so am I desperate by showing off my tits and / or thighs when I have an old face whilst making the most of my one (double) asset?

IHaveNeverLivedintheCastle · 21/12/2023 03:04

Namenumber3 · 21/12/2023 01:37

Is having “great legs” not showing your internalised misogyny though. Who’s definition of great legs are you using ? Do you mean the sort of long thin legs men like ( which by default become the ones women aspire to)
Are stumpy but strong or fat but fast legs not great too? Would you wear split and mini skirts if your legs weren’t great?

This is a weird thread. I think the second post with the underwear was telling.

Show quote history

I think that's a point worth at least thinking about. Obviously the point the OP was making was that wearing split skirts or low cut tops is pathetic if you don't have "great legs/ great boobs", but a lot of the posts on here are validating that approach.

All the "I've got it and I'll flaunt it" type posts and equally the poster I quoted who wishes she could wear split skirts but doesn't have the legs for it.

FizzyLaser · 21/12/2023 03:05

You’re really being ageist.

hangingonfordearlife1 · 21/12/2023 03:07

most people think the same but don't say it on netflix. it does look stupid imo

AngelaRippingMyLegIntheAir · 21/12/2023 10:19

I'm getting on a bit but I love getting my legs out in public 😊

TheGateaufromtheChateau · 22/12/2023 08:09

I love seeing people of all ages, abilities, shapes and sizes wear what they want with joy and confidence.

It can certainly bring more joy (and laughter) to the world at timesGrin

🙄😑

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