How do I cover my shoulders for church wedding?

[RedheadInARush]

Guest at smart wedding next month.

Sold a kidney and invested in this beauty.
https://rixolondon.com/products/sandrine-blue-leaf-jacquard

What cover-up would best suit it for the (very conservative, I'm warned) church part?

Maximum budget £40. Size 12.

Just wear a t shirt underneath or a blouse underneath and whip it off after the service

....as long as she doesn't do that in the church....

If you saw how people in the city I live in dress for 1st communions, you would not be worried by a little bit of shoulder showing

https://www.marksandspencer.com/pure-cotton-tweed-collarless-short-jacket/p/clp60595589
Has something like this been suggested? Probably more versatile than a mother of bride bolero type jacket. Or one of those cropped blazers that are everywhere?

I’m sure if you have any social skills at all you’ll be aware that offering an opinion that something recommended by someone else looks ‘cheap’ is not mild, it’s staggeringly rude.

It’s really very unlikely indeed that you’d make such a ‘mild’ comment face to face.

OP

You might want to take slippers for a Greek Orthodox church. Not all of them have seating Check with your friend.

On head covering, if you have something like a scarf, shawl, pashmina, whatever you can put that over your head but I think your friend would have mentioned it if it was required.

When I went to a friend's wedding in a Gurdwara we had instructions on which parts of the body to cover and colours to avoid, in the invitation and in the actual gurdwara we had instructions on sitting.

It was done in a welcoming way, a sort of, if you are not used to this this is what we do.

Some mad suggestions on here. Just take a light shawl or pashmina, whatever you want to calm it, drape round your shoulders for the service, it will keep you warm as well if the church is chilly, then whip it off immediately after you get outside. Job done. No need to buy a hideous lace bolero thing or a blazer (I quite like the blazer over dress look but you don’t need it here). And definitely do not wear a t shirt underneath unless you want to look like a sixth former from 1996.

Also, with the versatility of a pashmina you can drape it over anywhere that might cause offence - head, shoulders and cleavage.

Crikey, this got a bit heated in places!

I truly appreciate all points of view/ideas, and everyone who's taken time to post.

Weekend got hectic, so still working my way through links etc. Will get proper opportunity this evening and update you.

A few more quick answers to PPs' questions and a recap:

Greek Orthodox church ceremony, in London.

Bride, groom and both families are traditionalists, hence me putting any personal feelings about 'imposed female modesty' aside and respecting their guidance on dress etiquette.
(I checked re head coverings, btw: not necessary for this wedding. Phew!)

I did consider choosing the (sleeved) Sandrine dress, but thought the (sleeveless) Zadie would be more versatile in years to come.

I'm not hugely blessed in the bust department, but enough to mean the dress sits further up than on model pics. Wider shoulders too. So not revealing cleavage per se, but I suppose covering up that area also wise.

Very good point PP made re bra. Was thinking of an invisible low back bra converter, if anyone has experience?
(Otherwise, judicious use of tape?)

@AndyMcFlurry Have been reading up on the customs. Interesting. The symbolic stamping on groom's foot by bride, to reject notions of his dominance!

@nancy75 If only OneHundredStars could further reduce their sales prices to under £40...
<wishful sigh>

@SageRosemary Away from home, so can't take pics, but my beaded gold clutch bag's similar to the type in pic but with a clip frame fastening (mine was a charity shop find, from over 12 years ago).

My other bag is this satin envelope clutch.
https://www.swankyswans.co.uk/products/chantel-beautiful-satin-envelope-clutch-bag-teal
Very simple. But far more greenish/teal than I remembered and not blue enough for the dress?
I think you're right: gold bag and heels best.

@PegasusReturns

"OP do you have a fashion icon? What would she wear?"

Stevie Nicks does Greek Orthodox wedding...now, there's a wonderful thought!

Finally, thanks for the comedy on this thread

"I was trying to sneak it past the MN Guild of Pashmina Police and Blazer Enforcers"
and warnings not to whip off t-shirts in church have made me smile!

No, it really wouldn’t! A blazer would look god awful with that style of dress - as you’ve been told!!

I didn’t say pashmina - I said a shawl. They are back in whether you like it or not 🤷‍♀️

You can keep saying blazers are back in fashion, because they are. But just because it’s in fashion doesn’t mean it goes with everything!

You still have to use the creative side of your brain, not just blindly follow trends. Otherwise you’ll end up looking like a fool 🤡

Maybe not this pattern but something along the lines of this

https://www.next.co.uk/style/ls380199/k60130#k60130

as you’ve been told!!

Erm … You do understand the OP is a stranger on the Internet? You can’t actually control what she wears through vigorous deployment of exclamation marks.

If it were me I would probably wear a plain coordinating linen or silk coat - something like this:

https://www.massimoalba.com/en-uk/products/natalie2-linen-canvas-duster-deep-blue-u588-t3186

With a queenly brooch and all my best jewels. (Mainly because I’d want something I could wear for years afterwards in normal life.) But I’m not paying for a wedding!

To be fair that poster wasn't speaking to the OP - she was responding to the poster who is determined that a black, over-sized 1990s blazer is the only viable option.

You are right about the duster coat but the OP has set a budget of £40. So unless she already has something similar to wear whilst in the church ( I have a ridiculous, or ridiculously beautiful, floor length Cabbages and Roses cotton drill coat which is straight out of Jane Austen which would serve the purpose) or sees it as a long term investment it's probably not an option.

I do think your best option is a pashmina. I've found mine to be incredibly useful!

Weren’t talking to the OP if you read the quote my lovely - it’s a poster who will die on a hill of saying an oversized blazer is the only appropriate thing when it would look shit.

But still, you cannot force them to change their mind …

No amount of MN exclamation marks would stop me from wearing what I want.

I think an oversized blazer would look most excellent and not shit at all.

Never before have I so heartily regretted an off-hand suggestion…! At the end of the day, Teams Blazer and Pashmina are never going to agree, with both making the same arguments in favour of their choice. Hope you find something you feel great in, OP!

The OP said it is a Green Orthodox Church.

As far as I know from visiting some magnificent architectural and artistic highlights of Greek Orthodox Churrches and attending one wedding, both men and women are asked to cover shoulders and legs above the knee.

Stick to your principles if you like, and your male family and friends asked to observe the same etiquette, but it’s their church, not a publicly funded space, and you will miss some wonderful sights.

Im not, I’m telling her it just wouldn’t look good as multiple posters have told her and she keeps getting into arguments about it! Objectively, it just won’t look good.

Perhaps I should’ve worded it as “as you’ve been told by other posters” to satisfy you.

I’m assuming that by “Objectively, it just won’t look good” you actually mean “My subjective opinion is that it just won’t look as good”. Style isn’t objective. That’s what’s so great about it. Personally I think it would spoil what is a pretty high-fashion, on-trend dress to cover it with a shawl and the contrast with a boxy, oversize jacket would be striking and interesting. But that’s just my subjective opinion. Your subjective opinion is the opposite. OP can decide which opinion she agrees with and go with that. Or something else entirely!

Lots of people think it WOULD look good with an oversized blazer.

Okie dokie.

I can’t personally understand people saying it’s a high fashion dress. It’s really not, it’s quite classic which is great for OP as sounds like she wants to get some wear out of it over time. Everything is just opinion and suggestions for consideration to OP at the end of the day.

It IS classic but it’s also strappy, satin (well, viscose, but with the sheen) and bias cut which is very in right now.