How to feel proud of being a brunette?

[Friendsabouttown]

I know that sounds ridiculous but I have a group of friends. 6 out of 7 are natural brunettes but have bleached / platinum hair.

I did too until I got tired of the upkeep and damage it causes. I started getting my hair highlighted years ago because my skin is very pale and my eyes are very light - brighter hair made me sparkle.

Fast forward to today. I've let my extremely dark roots grow out and now I'm the only brunette in the group. It has taken a LONG time to get used to looking so different and I constantly hear things like

"Omg my hair is SO blonde I love it. So glad I don't have dull brown hair"

"I can afford to get my hair done every 4 weeks. I'm so lucky I can maintain my blonde" - then a quick pitiful glance at me.

"Look as us bunch of blondes" - cue selfie without me included.

The list goes on and on. I never receive a compliment and the blondeness between the rest seems to be competitive 😂 the whiter the better (I can't believe I am friends with people that shallow but I am, I love them and all their flaws!)

I'm just really struggling with being a brunette. I was doing the school run last week and noticed everyone was blonde! (Mostly brassy blonde.... but still!)

Anyone experienced similar or am I just surrounded by weird people?

Any makeup tips for brunettes with paler skin?

I'm the only blonde in my friend group and am jealous of all of their natural glossy brunette hair. Whereas I have a choice between frazzled dry blonde and dull mousey brown which doesn't suit me 🙄
But luckily my friends don't go on about their lovely brunette hair, because they are not a bunch of twats.
Get new friends.

Every time my children see blonde Middle Aged women out and about, they assume that they’re actually grey. I’m surprised at this assumption since they’re boys who are not particularly observant…. And I suspect they’re right a lot of the time.

But I also hear a lot of comments about dull brown hair etc. my hair is lovely, very dark but with copper through it naturally, and like a op said, in great condition. I’ve never dyed it and have minimal greys. So funny how people go nuts for dark haired men but dark haired women are boring?

Anyway your friends sound like tedious bitchez OP. Are they Mean Girls?

What kind of people actually say shit like that 😂 I would never purposely spend time with them

You are surrounding yourself with people who are shallow and seem to link their self worth to their hair colour.
These friends sound weird and exhausting

You have a very weird friendship group. It seems absurd to say but there are literally millions of beautiful brunettes. I can actually think of more than blond to be honest. Your friends sound vile

My SIL is like this with her blonde kids, I think it's because she wants something to brag about which feels kind of sad to me. I suspect your friends are the same - not much else going for them.

As a lifelong brunette, I genuinely think people look nicest when their hair matches with their skin tone, eyebrows etc. And usually that's when it's close to their natural colour.

Brunette is gorgeous, my hair is a dirty blonde and I dye it brown!

Embrace your natural hair! Ignore your identikit ‘friends’.

Life would be dull if we were all the same, your friends sound dull (not because of their hair but their conversation!).

I would look ridiculous as a blonde!

I don’t think your hair is the problem either!

You will be able to look fabulous and striking in bold colours, and from a beauty point of view brunette is every bit as stunning as blonde.

Your friends sound utterly bonkers.

God, they all sound like clones of each other. You’re the original one of the group - embrace it!!

As a group we have blonde, brown, grey, curly and we all like each other and are happy with the choices individuals have made.

I cannot imagine saying what your friends are saying to anyone. Are you sure you aren't projecting as seems so weird

Whilst your boys may well be correct in that assumption the fact your boys apparently think it's ok to make ageist comments about "blonde Middle Aged women" is something you might want to address. It doesn't show them or you in the good light you presumably think it does.

I was reading your post and nodding as many girls is my dds friends group all have the exact same hair. Until I read your ages, then it was weird 😂

Goodness, it's all a bit dramatic to lose an entire friendship group over this, but I reckon it's because you are daring to be a little bit different... You may stand out more in between them and not blend in as much.

They sound a bit scatty tbh, all talk about hair and looks. If it's what you need at the time (light talk) that's OK, but you don't have to go with the mantra. Just take from them what you need.

And then move on the rest of the time with your gorgeous brunette locks 😀

(it's quite amazing what a bit of blush does, especially for us light eyed folk)

Yeah my mum used to be brunette, then covered her hair with blonde, so when lockdown came she couldn't get topped up at the salon, and went natural grey. She's maintaining the grey now. It was an obsession of hers about what colour her hair was. She looks much nicer with grey hair as someone in her 70s now.

She also thinks women over 40 should have short hair. Mum has short hair.

I'm over forty and have natural grey and brown hair growing past my shoulders. My choice, and nobody cares.

I had longish hair for a while and there was a photo of me and my friends and I thought OMG we all have exactly the same haircut! (40s/50s)

I promptly had it cut back into a sassy bob.

Vive la difference!

I've gone blond to brunette etc etc. I've finally reached the point where my hair is it's natural brunette with a few greys appearing.

No colour damage, no upkeep, it's healthy hair.

I miss the blonde sometimes and I see people with extensions and new colours every few weeks looking fab. But I'm natural and happy, as you should be!

Your friends sound bitchy.

ThTs like being proud you have brown eyes, it makes no sense
It's just what you were born with

This is SO strange. What a weird group of people!

I know you say you love them anyway but tbh I dunno if I could love people so pathologically obsessed with dying their hair that they made it a topic of conversation regularly and thought they were better for being blonde. Odd as fuck.

Make your hair dark, glossy and shiny they will never compete with that. Bleach ruins your hair!

BLONDE Yes - fact
MIDDLEAGED - In your 50s? Also a fact.

That’s MY terminology which I am well entitled to make. Especially as I am
Middle Aged myself 🙄

I don't think you need to prepare snappy come backs for these women. I would just try to politely distance yourself from them. They are not your friend and probably not each others friends either. Friends in theirs 40s do not exclude people for their hair colour. 12 year olds do that. They sound boring and insecure.

Is this an excuse for some blonde bashing? There's certainly enough stereotypes in there, bitchy, vain, shallow, brassy...
Not to mention the invitation for everyone to say how much better and more atrractive being brunette is...how your blonde friends are just jealous because you're natural and shiny and they're all unoriginal fakes etc etc.
If you're not exaggerating, your friends are not nice people. Make some new ones.
If you want brown hair that's entirely up to you. It can look very lovely, as can blonde, red or grey.

The closer you are to your natural hair colour, the better your skin tone will look (unless you fancy teal o r pink or something, in which case go right ahead!) My hair is naturally blonde and curly - I can’t begin to tell you how far down the list of things I’m proud of it is.
Your friends sound vapid and boring, I’d go and make some new ones if I were you.

They've likely gone lighter to cover up the grey!

The only reason to feel proud of being blonde is if you're a natural blonde

Why?