I have turned into Eddie Izzard, but without the name and fame...

[CharlotteRumpling]

I have always had very masculine features. Think square jaw, big potato nose, thick eyebrows etc. It's only got worse as I have gotten older. My eyes used to be large and helped balance my nose; now have gotten smaller with time. I also photograph really badly and get photographed a lot in my job!

Today I was wearing a quite simple print shift dress, caught a glimpse of myself in a mirror, and thought Eddie "Suzy"Izzard. Or Grayson Perry. Urgh.

I don't even know why I am posting this. Maybe misery loves company? I don't believe in cosmetic surgery and won't be getting it, so I just have to find some way of living with this.

The frilly poufy fashions of today don't suit me at all, either.

No one’s suggesting the poster is a man. What’s wrong if this poster (a woman) naturally looks like a man? Are we all expected to totter around to your idea of what a women looks like? I hate to break it to you but even if she does look like a man she will always be a woman.

OMG this is me. The current humidity doesn't help!

I think summer dressing is so hard. I do better in winter. Plain shirt dresses are a good , though hard to find these days in the flood of frilly dresses! Any high street reccos? Am not overweight ( size 10 to 12) but am carrying my weight differently.

I might go down to a MAC counter and think about makeup a bit more.

I understand she doesn’t want to. But can you explain to me what’s wrong with it if she naturally does?

Nothing wrong I guess! But this is S and B, no? Where we all try to look a tiny bit better than we naturally do.

Another odd thing: I now look better with reading glasses than without! Maybe they break up my face.

I hate to break it to you but even if she does look like a man she will always be a woman.
Well duh. I don't think you understand what the thread is about or else you do and are just trying to derail it for some strange reason 🤔. So just to clarify, the OP does not want to look like Eddie Izzard.

Are we all expected to totter around to your idea of what a women looks like?
Very misogynistic suggestion that women totter around tut tut. What do you infer from my post I think women should look like @LillyoftheMountain?

I could say the same. All my features, that with the glow of youth, were at best 'ok' now have squared out and I look very blocky and masculine in features. Not helped by a meno belly that gives me the same shape as a 'dad bod'. Ive had hair issues with meno - so had to go very short which does me no favours at all.

I tried to reinvent myself with googling what suited my features, mainly to be comfortable in myself - I went to one of those colour consultants and paid to have a style guide, i also went to a renowned hairdresser who cut a very lovely a upward quiff. I got some new great glasses and some lovely makeup......

.....and a lady at work called it my 'dyke chic upgrade'

I was crushed.

I am also fairly masculine-looking OP and I actually find dressing androgynously looks better. I don’t wear dresses or skirts anymore and don’t wear overtly feminine makeup (eg red lipstick or nail polish). I wear a lot of plain, brightly coloured shirts. I also keep my hair medium length and wear a bit of jewellery so people know I am not actually a man! If you are tall and broad like me, overly feminine dressing can look a bit silly.

Have you had your colours done? Flattering clothes colours help imv (rather than red sequins or blue with polka dots a la others mentioned here)
Go to John Lewis and get a fashion dresser, if that's what they're called. I used one for a wedding outfit and ended up with something smart I'd never have considered myself.
If you are a 10 to 12 I can't believe you look like either of them.
Some people really suit glasses. Get some plain lens ones.

Lily, you are being deliberately obtuse. What's wrong with it Lily is that the OP presumably doesn't think the feminine incarnation of EI is attractive or something she personally wants to emulate. And if she doesn't like that particular look, it's really irrelevant if other people do. She has to feel good in herself. And we all have things about our looks that we aren't happy with and want to change. Even if other people don't agree and think we look fine.

My advice is to get advice from a hairdresser on what styles/colours would suit your face and skin tone. Then maybe book a personal stylist at a few different shops and try out lots of looks that are outside of your usual style and comfort zone. There are companies that can advise on colour palettes.
^
It's my personal opinion that frills don't suit many grown women and it's a shame that tiered, flowery, frilly stuff is everywhere at the moment.
I'd probably go sharp and structured, because thats what I lean to naturally but get some help in real life, if you didn't want to post photos here.^

Honestly OP, I’m hearing you. Its all gone to shit since I turned 40. Also have resting bitch face so have had to lean into that look. All those pouffy sleeves, florals that my mum wore back in the 80s and shirred/frills/folds make me look like ET when Drew Barrymore went at him with the dressing up box.

I ordered some pratical, comfy linen dresses with pockets in plain colours from amazon that are brilliant. Will post the link but the open neck makes me look a bit more feminine. I get my brows done regularly, use a tanning moisturising, shave my legs and regular pedicures so I feel a bit better April to August. Without make up I look a fright but do try and put some small bit on if I’m leaving the house or have zooms meetings. Developing a take me or leave me attitude has definitely helped!!

I used to look fine in frills and flounces but I think we all reach a point where it doesn't work any more, and over designed glamorous dresses don't either.

I quite like a flattering top and wide linen trousers in the summer

@flabbergastedandfumbletooted you sound like Tilda Swinton, whose style I love. I can't have a quiff- hair too thick and wavy- but I love them on others.

Appreciate all the suggestions and high street reccos for androgynous chic also appreciated. I do suit bright colours and wear them a lot. Colours like emerald, teal, deep pink, deep tomato red....

This is the kind of thing I usually like, though it's too expensive for me, and sometimes I do get tired of dressing so plain.. Dark Denim Easy Linen Shirt Dress | WHISTLES | I have a 60 year old friend who has a uniform of black, navy and white clothes, which she pairs with very unusual jewellery and colourful bags. I wonder if that is the way to go.

I've noticed this. I think it's a peri/menopausal thing. Natures way of making us unattractive so that men don't mistakenly think our ovaries are working.

I almost started a thread on menopausal ugliness. I'm just going with it but having to adjust things so that I don't look too drag. Eg shoulder pads, mascara.

What a total bitch. I bet you looked fantastic.

I have to say, some of the descriptions on this thread are making me snort with laughter, especially the ET one.

With the wry sense of humour some of you have, there’ll be no resting bitch face that isn’t softened by a twinkle in the eye. You’re great.

H and M sometimes have dresses similar to the one you just posted at a cheaper price in black/khaki/cream type colours.

Though just seen you prefer bright colours- whoops!

Personally, I don't think there's anything wrong with OP looking a state, but clearly doesn't want to, hence posting in 'Style and Beauty'.

La Redoute is usually good for simple shirt dresses.

I think if you have strong features you need structure to suit them - so well-shaped eyebrows, as people have said, a definite hairstyle, and a definite silhouette rather then loose, floaty clothes. If you suit strong colours you're probably a winter or maybe summer, which combined with avoiding floaty clothes means it's tricky to find clothes at the moment (I'm the same and am struggling) as they're just not in fashion.

Since getting older and putting on weight I've realised I look exactly like my uncle 😬

Op I sympathise.
Looked in the mirror one day and saw Jimmy Saville. So I had my white bob restyled and now look like Myra Hindley.

He looks a fucking state most of the time!

If you don’t mind OP looking a state then whey did you say the above about Eddie?

🤣🤣🤣🤣

Because he does, and that's fine with me too 😂

Ah. 'Sometimes, it's hard to be a woman.'

😂

Why can’t women and men wear what they want without being judged. Or in your case laughed at?