If you have no interest in style or beauty why post?

[TheDead]

I ask this in all seriousness and not to start an argument but it occurred to me that pretty every post at the moment on S&B has several posters essentially saying 'who cares...wear what you like'.

And we all know that's true and actually exactly what does happen but I think S&B IS a place to talk about....well...style & beauty related things!

I don't see the point in opening a thread about 'what should I wear to x, y or z' to post 'no-one cares, wear what you like'

It's just not in the spirit!

I want to chat to fellow posters about all manner of trivial S&B things without being made feel I'm being trivial! My life is stressful & this is an escape at times.

Does anyone else feel the same or am I just feeling cranky?

“And "frumpy" is not a neutral word.”

Of course it isn’t “neutral”!I cannot believe someone actually suggested that. The word has connotations such as: unflattering, old fashioned, ageing, unstylish etc.

‘Whatever you’re comfortable with’ , people don't wear what they are uncomfortable with

If somebody posts ‘what jeans are currently on trend’ and receive replies saying ‘whatever you are comfortable with’ - how does that help them in the slightest? They may as well not have posted!

Just to add, you’re right. It’s ludicrous to be put off wearing something because Matt Hancock - or anyone else - has been wearing it. That is batshit insane.

I hope I wouldn’t be such a sheeple that I would follow the flock and not dare put a hood wrong! Lol

I do agree with you op.
I originally joined S&B postpartum, post-lockdown when I really felt like I had lost my way, style-wise. My body, circumstances, the world had all changed, and my wardrobe (even though I liked it) felt dated (to me) and uninspiring. Maybe that makes me shallow, but I certainly wanted to update my look in a way that fitted my lifestyle, and I got a lot of "why does it matter what you wear" in the start. I guess it doesn't, but in the same way I don't want to cook with the same ingredients year in, year out, I don't want to wear the same clothes either.

I am interested in fashion, and love to follow it without buying into too many trends. It's part of the cultural zeitgeist and a form of art (yes, call it frivolous - it's only called that because it's firmly in the female domain). I love looking at a Fendi handbag in the same way I'd look at a Cezanne. I wouldn't like to own either because they would look completely out of place in my life, but I appreciate both.

As for opinions, I thrive to be honest but gentle. If someone asks me if a pair of shoes looks good and they genuinely don't, I'd say so - but kindly.

Correction:

…hoof wrong

@Chasedbythechaser I see it more as is OP is happily wearing skinnies at the moment, they may be more comfortable moving to straight legs than really wide legs with pleats at the top. Hence saying a variation of the comment.

I think it’s up the site owners / moderators to make decisions on what is permitted or not. I do hope you are not suggesting you, and a small clique, should be able to decide what is and is not allowed on threads where you deign to post? (I have a thread in mind, actually, which I find laughably exclusive and a tad laughable in its earnestness…)

Mumsnet is inclusive - and that applies to all threads on the site. Users should not attempt to control the output of other people.

I'm agreeing with you and OP about that particular comment.

“…and a tad laughable in its earnestness…)”

Oops - overuse of “ laughable”. Let’s say “irritating” in preference.

Yet it doesn’t answer the question.

Saying straight legs or wide legs - does. But saying ‘whatever you’re comfortable’ absolutely does not.

It merely encourages other people to jump in with their ‘sheepie’ comments and then yet another thread is derailed and lost without the OP getting answers to her initial question.

“…a seriously uncool person can be the death of desirability and what's trending or fashion feeds off of desirability and attainability.”

Oh my goodness. What a truly ridiculous opinion.

Well I can be terribly earnest about clothes and I'm not embarrassed to say so. And I consider myself very lucky in that, just as was starting to think maybe this wasn't the board for me, I stumbled onto a thread where posters are generally happy to indulge me.

But I think the trick when you open a thread is is to suss out whether it's the right place for earnestness or spikiness or whether the op has three children under five and just wants a few trainer suggestions before the youngest one wakes up. And if you realise you've misjudged the mood - as we all do sometimes - to withdraw as gracefully as you can.

"a seriously uncool person can be the death of desirability and what's trending or fashion feeds off of desirability and attainability.”

Oh my goodness. What a truly ridiculous opinion."

I don't understand why this is a ridiculous opinion. There is nothing that I can see about brands of trainers that objectively makes one better than another.
Coolness is acquired because people who are deemed to be cool, have chosen one brand over the other. Therefore if a person who is perceived as the antithesis of cool wears a particular brand, that brand loses appeal.
It's why very high end designers are choosy about who they sell to and why brands spend ££££ on marketing, cultivating a cool reputation.
It's all bullshit - what should matter is quality, durability, comfort, how an item looks on the body.

Look at what happened to Burberry when Danielle Westbrook was photographed wearing it.

1. One swallow doth not a summer make.
2. In addition, whatever you might think about Matt Hancock, unlike legions of followers who revere certain brands of trainers he’s not thick. He is, in fact an Oxbridge graduate.
3. He probably doesn’t agonise about the stitching of the “desirable” trainers - unlike some posters on this forum.

…is, in fact,

As for “coolness” that’s a teen thing. Or a rapper thing. Neither of those groups will be on Mumsnet, surely.

I don’t think that an entire brand can be cool. Nike, for example - Dunks or Blazers are currently cool and AF1’s were for ages, not so much now. But the generic grey knit ones that someone posted previously as being similar to a pair of sketchers, are definitely not cool. Probably very comfy, but not very trendy.

As for one person making something undesirable, I still wear my Stan Smiths and Matt Hancock wearing them won’t make me stop.

I think Cam22 that 1) when you start referring to posters you've never met as
'thick' and 2) if a thread no-one forces you to read irritates you so much you find yourself recognising poster names and coming after them, then maybe it's time to go looking for that Mumsnet grip.

I won't be knowingly responding to you again so if you happen to be one of those posters who has to have the last word then the floor is yours. Have a good afternoon.

If you’re the type of person who scoffs at the idea of Matt Hancock putting you off wearing Stan Smiths, you’re probably not the type of person a thread about cool trainers is aimed at.

Last word!

Incidentally, one would have to be very blinkered indeed not to notice self important people on certain threads on this forum. It reminds me of the ones on the UK Royal Family threads.

I am entitled to make observations, in addition - just as you are to flounce dramatically…

Indeed!

Re trainers those foamy monstrosities are a crime.

Cam22

But what are you trying to achieve if you aren’t bothered about following fashion highs and lows?

I wouldn’t go onto the baby thread asking about baby led weaning stating spoon feeding is better or just as good because a) it is of very little interest to me these days and b) my opinion of spoon fed feeding wasn’t asked for?

I might have an opinion on the above but I don’t have the urge to share it with people.

I 100% agree with this - a lot of posters are asking for advice because they're not confident and not sure what suits them. I'm 18month post-partum and I'm having to adapt to a different body than before because I haven't gone back to my pre-baby size. I don't feel confident in what I wear so I ask advice of other people. I feel comfy in leggings and a jumper but I definitely don't feel confident in that - therefore, wear what makes you feel good is an entirely moot point!