I'm so heavy

[withmycoffee]

I am 5'3" and a small UK 12. So I'm a little chunky for my height but not anything excessive. I wear mediums In most brands. Being shorter ideally I would be a uk 8 and wear xs but I'm in my 50s and look ok. I work out and have significant muscle but.... I am 80kg. EIGHTY. How am I so heavy?

OP I think you look fit and strong and wouldn't think you weigh 80kg.

@BeenAsFarAsMercyAndGrand

The whole debate about the BMI of super-muscly men is irrelevant if you're a woman imo. A man has to train extremely hard to get the kind of muscle mass that would start to distort their BMI, and women do not build muscle mass like men do. They just don't.

Serena Williams, Caster Semenya, Fatima Whitbread - these are/were very strong, muscly women, but even they haven't built the kind of muscle mass that would distort their BMI.

They also have sub 14% body fat. Not something the averagely muscle bound woman would have or aspire to. Take that same muscle mass, add a healthy 22% body fat and see what you'd end up with. Point is obesity is really concerned with excess body fat. Not overall weight.

I'm totally surprised at you being 80kg OP and can understand why you are bemused - to me you look like an average size 12 in the full length photos. I'm 60, a few inches taller than you, 68-9kg (winter weight) top end of healthy BMI & I'm a size 10 - (bottoms) - 12 (tops) on average. You don't look obese to me - I'm quite taken aback at people who have said you do. I was low level obese about 10 years ago & I looked waaaaay bigger than you. You look great!

This is insane. Unless a woman is training heavily (i.e. professional athlete levels of training) they are not going to have the muscle mass of Serena Williams. And if they are training heavily, they are unlikely to have 22% body fat. I'm not sure what you want people to say to you tbh.

@BeenAsFarAsMercyAndGrand

This is insane. Unless a woman is training heavily (i.e. professional athlete levels of training) they are not going to have the muscle mass of Serena Williams. And if they are training heavily, they are unlikely to have 22% body fat. I'm not sure what you want people to say to you tbh.

Shot putters, wrestlers and women who do other weight assisted sports frequently have high muscle mass AND high body fat %. Not sure why this is a surprise to you.

I am 5ft 3.

I weigh 74 kg and take a size 16 in everything

I said 'unlikely'; most athletes, and most women aren't shot putters or wrestlers.

If people want to base their assessment of a healthy weight on extreme examples taken from very specific sports, or male examples, crack on. But for the vast majority of women (we're talking 99%), BMI is a valid measure of health.

Shot putters, wrestlers and women who do other weight assisted sports frequently have high muscle mass AND high body fat %. Not sure why this is a surprise to you.

Cross fit female athletes have low body fat.

I like your attitude op, in response to some of the comments.
Seeing the pictures and hearing the height and weight stats just make me think that weight doesn't tell us everything.
You're clearly fit, healthy and not obese.

@ZaraW

Shot putters, wrestlers and women who do other weight assisted sports frequently have high muscle mass AND high body fat %. Not sure why this is a surprise to you.

Cross fit female athletes have low body fat.

Yes, this is what I see at the crossfit box I attend. The men are often really big ('built'), but the women aren't. They're tend to be muscly (less muscly than the men, more like Jessica Ennis Hill or Venus Williams) and lean.

@FindingMeno

I like your attitude op, in response to some of the comments. Seeing the pictures and hearing the height and weight stats just make me think that weight doesn't tell us everything. You're clearly fit, healthy and not obese.

Haha I'm actually finding this thread really entertaining. Way more so than I had expected 🤣 Who brought cross fitters into the conversation? Yes, they tend to have low bf.

Clothes sizes are meaningless. I'm 5'4 and 76kg and the clothes that fit me at the moment vary from a size 10 to a size 18!

Haha I'm actually finding this thread really entertaining. Way more so than I had expected 🤣
Who brought cross fitters into the conversation? Yes, they tend to have low bf.

That would be me. Lots of weightlifting in Cross Fit. I find your reactions very strange.

You don’t look obese at all OP and those who are posting snide remarks, well that’s Mumsnet for you.

Who's posting "snide remarks"?

OP found out she has a BMI over 30. She expressed surprise at this. When asked, she posted some photos. Some random strangers thought she does look like her BMI is over 30. Nothing snide - just opinions and discussion based on the OP's OP.

Op you are my people! You look perfectly healthy to me. You train hard and have a great muscle mass (I'm jealous ) I am 5ft8 and am 83kg in summer and usually go to 86kg in winter. I am classed as obese. I cannot get the scales any lower. I train lots like you. I now use a tape measure to see where my body is changing. I have in the past become obsessed with food intake and although I could lose a bit more, I just want to enjoy my food, enjoy my training and stop worrying about the bloody scales and BMI.

@CantGetNoSleep73

Op you are my people! You look perfectly healthy to me. You train hard and have a great muscle mass (I'm jealous ) I am 5ft8 and am 83kg in summer and usually go to 86kg in winter. I am classed as obese. I cannot get the scales any lower. I train lots like you. I now use a tape measure to see where my body is changing. I have in the past become obsessed with food intake and although I could lose a bit more, I just want to enjoy my food, enjoy my training and stop worrying about the bloody scales and BMI.

Wow, you are the same height à me but 25kgs heavier and I have a lot of muscle through running. I'm definitely not skinny. You are the same weight as my DH who is 181cm and overweight according to BMI. I'm confused!

You're 10kg heavier than my 6 foot DH. In your pictures you don't look obese in my opinion but who knows in real life. It does seem strange that you weigh so much and look pretty normal, I still think there is either a problem with the scales or that you are taller than you think! I spent years thinking I was 5'5 then I had to get measured at a hospital for something to do with my DD and I was a little over 5'6. I'm pretty pleased to have gained that extra inch!

@StayingHere

You're 10kg heavier than my 6 foot DH. In your pictures you don't look obese in my opinion but who knows in real life. It does seem strange that you weigh so much and look pretty normal, I still think there is either a problem with the scales or that you are taller than you think! I spent years thinking I was 5'5 then I had to get measured at a hospital for something to do with my DD and I was a little over 5'6. I'm pretty pleased to have gained that extra inch!

Same thing happened to me. I always thought I was 5'2" but sometime in my 40s I was measured and I discovered I was 5'3". I always thought it was weird that I seemed slightly taller than my 5'2" friends. I must have grown an inch really late as I know I was 5'2" at some point in my early 20s.

Same thing happened to me. I always thought I was 5'2" but sometime in my 40s I was measured and I discovered I was 5'3". I always thought it was weird that I seemed slightly taller than my 5'2" friends. I must have grown an inch really late as I know I was 5'2" at some point in my early 20s.

Exactly the same thing happened to me - I went from 5'3 to 5'4. I first noticed it in my early 40s about a year after I had a surgically-induced menopause and wondered if it was linked to that, but possibly not if others are experiencing it. I wondered why I just seemed taller and got my husband to measure me to confirm it.

@Stilltalkstotrees

Who's posting "snide remarks"?

OP found out she has a BMI over 30. She expressed surprise at this. When asked, she posted some photos. Some random strangers thought she does look like her BMI is over 30. Nothing snide - just opinions and discussion based on the OP's OP.

It is mumsnet A thread about weight Anyone dare to indicate someone is overweight /not exercising enough / eating too much - accusations come thick and fast.

The name of the game is “you look great OP”

87kg, 5'2.5, size 14-16 here.

@Lassy1945 actually, for reasonable people, the name of the game is 'wow that is heavy for your size, my DH is 6ft tall and weighs less than that' or 'Nah, I'm 87kg 52.5 14-16 so 80 kg size 12 is absolutely possible'. What it shouldn't be but some posters seem very determined to express is 'you are clearly morbidly obese, look size 18 minimum and no way are you a size 12' all addressing pictures of someone who is clearly fit, not even close to a size 16/18/22, no where near obese, is carrying some fluff and is happy to say so. Everyone on MN can see genuine comments and everyone on MN can identify posters who have such massive issues that they feel the need to say ridiculous things to try to bring people down. Fortunately, most people just laugh and filter past those sorts of posters. It's the same with 'how old do I look' posts where people like you are so determined to knock the poster back that you would add 15 years onto whatever the person looks like. Have you every asked yourself what you get out of this? If you are so angry and bitter online, I wonder what you are like IRL. Meek and put upon I suspect

It doesn’t sound right but maybe the muscle? I was a large 14 a couple of months ago and 80kg (5foot5) - I’ve lost a stone and now a big 12.

Have you weighed yourself again, just to double check? I know they were hospital scales, but if it was me, and I was so surprised, I'd want to check again.