Help finding a black tie dress for DM

[TheBumbleNums]

I posted on here a couple of weeks ago about my sister’s up-coming wedding (hopefully the end of the next year) and that it’s black tie themed.

I need some help finding DM something to wear! She loves clothes shopping but invariably takes back about 99% of her purchases. It took her about a year to find anything she liked for my wedding, after many shopping trips and many purchases.

She keeps looking at things that my sister describes as ‘summer garden party wedding’ rather than black tie. She’s a very traditional Mother of the Bride, think matching dress, jacket and hat type thing. It’s made harder because mother of the groom is tall, slender and glamorous and likely to wear some sort of show stopper. I know my mum will be comparing herself all day (she’s already made several comments about how lovely and slim the groom’s mother is)

It’s hard for her because (and I’m saying this with love) she is short and looks like a barrel with legs. She wouldn’t wear anything long or clingy, anything with ruffles is out. It must have a sleeve (or something that she can wear a wrap/cardi over).

I have absolutely no idea what sort of style to suggest to her. Does anyone have any ideas? I want her to look and feel great on the day, whilst also embracing the black tie theme.

What size is she

I would say a 14-16 with a tummy

Sounds just like me, what colours does she like and what sort of price range, and how old is she.

How old is she? You could have a look online at red carpet photos of people like Judi Dench/Helen Mirren/Emma Thompson/whoever fits with your DM's age and shape and see what she thinks of their outfits.

It's a bit early to be looking for this surely? What's her budget is there anyone's who's style she likes?

If the outfit is so important that's she's shopping a year in advance and she struggles with her shape, then I'd get something custom made for her. It should not be so pricey. All you need is a style/photo that she likes and the fabric.

If she's not keen on black and white I'd look at soft greys, mink/nudes or a really rich deep navy.

How about this style. Flattering length when worn with heels, covers arms, gives a waist but the volume flatters the tum.

Ideally made to measure, so it fits perfectly.

I'm that size, my evening dress is from bravissimo then I had it shortened. It's got thick straps aka bra friendly, and I bought a jacket to wear with it or use a wrap

www.johnlewis.com/gina-bacconi-layla-bell-ruffle-sleeve-jacket-and-dress/p4121477

Something like this?

She is a size 14-16 and about 5’2”. Only ever wears a kitten heel. Mid-60s. There isn’t really a budget, she spent about £600 on her outfit for my wedding (in total)

And for the poster who said surely this is too early- if anything there isn’t enough time between now and my sister’s wedding for my mum to find something, she is so indecisive!

www.bombshellhq.com/collections/party-dresses/products/silk-dupion-emerald-green-grace-tie-front-shirt-dress

Bombshell have lots of silk dupion dresses like this

@nevertrustaherdofcows

www.johnlewis.com/gina-bacconi-layla-bell-ruffle-sleeve-jacket-and-dress/p4121477

Something like this?

That’s very nice, I might suggest that to her! Thank you!

The problem with being indecisive is she will change her mind so much by the end of next year!!! Too early if you ask me.

I know and that’s the problem! But if I can start to get some ideas of what might suit her and steer her in that direction now, it might take the stress out of listening to her get upset/stressed in the next ten months!

Try googling wiggle dress, surprisingly flattering on any size.

For half of the £600 she previous spent she could have something gorgeous created for her. And I often find that when something is tailored to fit, then it gives you that extra confidence boost.

She could take one of the summer dress styles that she's keen on and get it made in a more appropriate fabric for a winter/black tie theme wedding

Something simple and classic like this jacket and dress could be lovely. It's out of stock online but you could try and track it down in store. Hobbs are usually very good.

Or use it for inspiration and get it made by a seamstress to custom fit.

That jacket and dress is beautiful but I would look like a shapeless sack in it.

This sort of cut would be much more flattering.

images.app.goo.gl/i8GgDnKVK9amMfDh6

I googled Judy Dench red carpet. She wears some beautiful kaftan style suits, which sort of embrace the barrel look. They look comfortable, glamorous, sparkly and most wonderfully make everyone else look over-dressed and fussy. If you live some where with an Asian population, you'd be able to get something fantastic made at a tailors.

www.eonline.com/uk/news/474737/judi-dench-walks-the-red-carpet-without-a-cane-six-weeks-after-undergoing-knee-surgery

Search 'mother of the bride outfits' on John Lewis site (sorry, can't link). Gina Bacconi, Chesca, Studio 8 all have some contenders.

Or you can do a personal styling appointment online or in person. I've found them very good.

This is lovely, www.johnlewis.com/hobbs-petite-isabella-spot-pleated-midi-dress-kingfisher/p5169598 it's far smarter than the dress I wore to my son's wedding.

@goose1964

This is lovely, www.johnlewis.com/hobbs-petite-isabella-spot-pleated-midi-dress-kingfisher/p5169598 it's far smarter than the dress I wore to my son's wedding.

Not really black tie, though?

How about super simple, with a dressy jacket.

Simple shift
www.jacques-vert.co.uk/satin-fitted-shift-dress-bf59d3

Dressy jacket
www.jacques-vert.co.uk/japonica-jacquard-long-line-jacket-ab589d

Or just go all out, this is floral but the shades are wintery
www.jacques-vert.co.uk/brush-stroke-floral-satin-dress-a6a3a4

With a simple cropped jacket
www.jacques-vert.co.uk/cropped-jacket-b1209b

catherinesofpartick.co.uk/mother-of-the-bride-dresses-groom-outfits/page/6/.

Some nice things on this site

Unfortunately I think you have a mismatch; black tie is evening dress which certainly isn't MOB dress/coat/hat.
If all the men are wearing evening dress as the black tie suggests, women shouldn't wear a hat and coat combination.
Sorry to sound negative but you need to clarify what your sister means with the theme as your mum could look totally "wrong"