How to not look middle aged

[Justtakeatowel]

I've seen a few pictures of my recently and I look frumpy. I don't mind looking my age (mid 40s) but I just look uurgh.

I've started curly girl and I think curly hair ages me loads! Where do I need to buy from to make myself a bit more with it? I've a tendency to buy cheap supermarket stuff which I think isn't always cut the best and I'm willing to spend a bit more.

I'm 5 ft 7 and 9 stone 9 if that makes a difference but a definite apple and have a bit of a belly which I think adds to the frumpiness

Thanks!

This is getting a bit bad tempered. I think the consensus is that the scarf look, whilst might suit some, is not what the OP is looking for.

I don’t think they’d any need to start slagging off statement necklaces etc... that’s just starting to sound bitchy.

@Justtakeatowel did you decide on anything? Find any Pinterest/Instagram pictures you liked?

@Justtakeatowel whose style do you like in real life/celebrity? I always think we’re a bit constrained here by the bloody weather! Hard to look chic/cool in the wind and the rain! I’m outdoors with my job a lot too which is quite challenging sartorially

Statement jewellery is a no no.

Waterfall cardigans too.

Community Clothing is good.

To be fair, statement necklaces were mentioned early on the thread. They make me think of Theresa May.

www.google.co.uk/aclk?sa=l&ai=DChcSEwjY6f61zpjqAhU1gFAGHZtDCJIYABAAGgJkZw&sig=AOD64_2y6_sXxY510CCJwgdahkszQzPPwA&q&adurl&ved=2ahUKEwiQuPe1zpjqAhVFtXEKHZZPB9gQ0Qx6BAgSEAE

This thread has made me quite emotional. I've only read to page 5 and now I see nothing before me but spending a fortune on clothes and getting my hair done.

Fuck it I'll be one of the frumpy ones! I'll spend the money on hiding away from society so no one has to look at my shit clothes and messy hair.

@wowfudge, you have read my post and its subtext with perfect accuracy. BCBG is exactly WASP preppy or Sloane, but the French equivalent. Like I said earlier, "Naice, tasteful, well-bred". I did also point out that it wasn't necessarily a compliment, though anyone BCBG would take it as one.

I don't think the thread is getting bad tempered @Railing, but then I am an opinionated old biddy fashionista. I like clothes, but now I like fashion and style that suits my years. I am not going to embrace any style that reveals my wrinkly flesh or my fleshy bits, and I don't need anyone's approval anymore (DH might get 0.25% of a vote), but I also don't live a life that involves formal trussed up tailored anything so I wear very nice jeans, a t shirt or cashmere jumper, depending on season, and very edgy Italian trainers or boots, bought in sales. If I can't wear supportive underwear, forget it.

But today, I have on chino shorts in a bright yellow and green print of lemons and an acid yellow Breton. It is very Stella Jean. And it looks flattering, and age-appropriate and -- modern. Mis-matched earrings, and Rieker walking sandals.

I think this lady looks chic whatever age she is.

I would personally wear that dress a little shorter (as I'm only 5'3") but love the white, the wrap style of the dress is very flattering to boobs & tums, the boots are cool & the jewellery is pretty.

@Joywillcomeagain

This thread has made me quite emotional. I've only read to page 5 and now I see nothing before me but spending a fortune on clothes and getting my hair done.

Fuck it I'll be one of the frumpy ones! I'll spend the money on hiding away from society so no one has to look at my shit clothes and messy hair.

Noooooo don’t say that! The OP just wanted to have a bit more style rather than look younger.

Style is such a subjective thing. I think my main takeaways from this thread are to be confident and not apologetic (too many women are apologetic), think about whose style you like, buy less but better quality things, have fun! Treat yourself to a hand lotion/body lotion - start small. Use positive language about yourself not negative. The rest is just noise/opinion. 💓

@Joywillcomeagain don't worry, i shop in cheaper places like Tesco & Primark, New Look & Dorothy Perkins, and no-one cares what I wear. I don't look frumpy mcfrumpsville yet.

I do spend out on highlights but I do other beauty stuff myself & dont like Botox etc.

[quote Terralee]@Joywillcomeagain don't worry, i shop in cheaper places like Tesco & Primark, New Look & Dorothy Perkins, and no-one cares what I wear. I don't look frumpy mcfrumpsville yet.

I do spend out on highlights but I do other beauty stuff myself & dont like Botox etc.[/quote]
Frumpy McFrumpsville - love it

@Terralee, it's a lovely picture and very chic, but it would look totally laughable outside a posh restaurant locally.

There's a geographic element to chic dressing, as well as the weather factor. For most of the year in Cornwall, in that outfit, you would look bedraggled rather than chic. Great wet weather gear is an essential too, and finding garments that exclude rain efficiently, allow movement and still flatter is not easy, and when you find something good, it's likely to be expensive, so you have to like it enough to wear it for several years. Classic is classic for a reason.

Barbour sells waterproof coats, year in and year out. They don't change the styles very much, and they are quite expensive. But they are warm and waterproof, and last between 10 and 30 years. Most of what I wear isn't about fashion; it's about looking good living my life, and I have several friends who want to take me shopping as their stylist because (I assume) they think I have a good eye for colour and shapes. It's not my business though.

@XingMing

Barbour sells waterproof coats, year in and year out. They don't change the styles very much, and they are quite expensive. But they are warm and waterproof, and last between 10 and 30 years. Most of what I wear isn't about fashion; it's about looking good living my life, and I have several friends who want to take me shopping as their stylist because (I assume) they think I have a good eye for colour and shapes. It's not my business though.

Yes I’ve got a Barbour. It’s a parka one so is about as modern as the brand gets! It’s great for dog walks and I don’t feel completely unstylish in it. I wear it with a down Uniqlo gilet under for an extra layer. It’s not exactly the height of style but it’s relatively stylish and at least practical . I’m a lot further north than you so have the cold and the wet to deal with!

Try other thing about this thread us that everyone has different lifestyles. The things that get worn the most in my wardrobe are the wet/cold weather stuff so I made a decision last year to upgrade some of those items as I wear them so much. It didn’t thrill me as I’d much rather buy lovely dresses and boots/heels but unfortunately due to my lifestyle I don’t get much chance to wear those things day to day.

So OP think about what you need in terms of day to day life.

Yes, I agree that fashion is geographic. I love bright colours and edgy styles, I would fit right in in Central London but in my suburban town I would just get stared at, so I wear more normal stuff then dress up when I go to London.

Exactly! My definition of stylish is very attuned to weather. The outer layer has to keep it out, wet, or cold or both. I only go out for dinner or drinks once, maybe twice a week, but I have to walk XingDog every day, seven days a week whatever the weather does. So I own all the bits that protect me from the elements and more to smooth the look into presentable. Summer walking on dry ground is easy. I even wear white sometimes.

That's fab alright terralee but also agree ré the day to day wear, which is hard to get right in terms of unusual/interesting.
What is a waterfall cardigan? It is hard to get a decent cardigan or light jacket so any pointers on these would be great.

It's putting on weight and cutting off lovely long hair that does it.

As soon as someone plonks on a couple of stone and cuts their hair short when long hair was their best feature, they suddenly look middle-aged, IMO.

That said, I'm 41 and don't care what age I look any more. I try to stay slim and keep my skin and hair as nice as I can, that'll do me, bollocks to the rest.

I love knitted hoodie cardigans, also non hooded zipper sweatshirts (sometimes get them in a biker style). Always go for grey or black as it goes with everything. Next occasionally do lovely t-shirts (but also do rubbish ones). I like H&M too, have some skinny khaki cargo trousers from there which I love. Yes to whoever up thread said Italian style trainers, I have some silver ones which are very like leather converse but with better support. I remember being on hols in Spain or Portugal and spotting a group of very stylish women (all looked about 50 and I was under 40 at the time). I had tried on but not bought some skinny grey cargo jeans in a fashion shop the day before as I thought they were too "young". Regretted it when I saw one of the older ladies at the airport looking v chic in hers. Not sure where they were from but definitely not British.

Forget big knickers, where pretty nice underwear, I add never have a skin care routine ( take omega 3 for skin and hair).
At 58, told I look ok, clothes vary, hair coloured.
Ditch any excessive weight, dye or go grey, the worsen gummidge of older ladies is unkempt hair, and clothes better suited to younger women

HeyGirl A waterfall cardigan falls loosely from the shoulders all round with no buttons. or waist\bust shaping, It looks better than it sounds!

You never see anyone under 40 wearing a waterfall cardigan though.

Not a problem if they looks nice IMO wow fashion victims are just that. The sooner fast fashion disappears the better for the world.