P lease help: need a whole new look in 2 weeks

[notatwork]

I am fat and 50: need something comfortable as I am midst hot-flushes.

Graduation in 2 weeks (attending). I usually wear trousers and shirts for work and Gudrun or festival clothing out of work. I'm a size 18 with historical hourglass figure now overlayed with big tuckable tum.

I need to blend in. It's my DSDs graduation and I am very much peripheral, but because I am a bit of a hippy I get noticed for the wrong reasons. I want to look like everyone else for one day.

Hence my plea. I don't usually wear skirts/dresses at all and am very self conscious about stubble/scars/bad skin so if I wear a skirt or dress it needs to be long. I need recommendations for not too hot smoothing underwear. DH will look lovely in a soft grey suit. DSD's DM will be glamourous and I am not going in that direction at all.

I need the works please: clothes and shoes and underwear and make up and everything to make me look like a normal person and fly under the radar.

I am very out of step with all this stuff: last time I wore a dress was DB's wedding where I opted for 50s frock with underskirt, felt self-conscious so bought a size too big and looked like a marshmallow with my bra showing in all the photos. Not the effect I was going for!

Budget isn't an issue if it's fabulous/perfect but it probably won't be worn again before it is long out of fashion so designer pieces probably a waste. Thanks in advance!

Oh, I'm an autumn so can't wear blue or black/cool colours very well.

Debenhams have some cycling short type things which are light control and I don't get overheated in them no matter how hot it is. I think they key is they're not trying to shrink me into a smaller size, they are just smoothing everything out!

Or a simple linen sress with a smart jacket would be lovely.

Oh no....but worth a google. I believe they have a London/ online outlet with similar dresses. The fabric flows beautifully. I am wearing mine with flat sandals.... Maybe even my beloved birkies in the evening. Good luck.....I feel your pain!

this with a cute little cropped cardigan in a summery pink, yellow or minty green would be nice too.

@Atalune Love that shirt and have it already! I wear it with linen cropped but not fitted trousers in a sandy/taupe colour on really hot days. So comfy!

would help if I put the link in!

I've also just bought these and was very impressed with how comfortable and smart they are, you might be more comfortable in something like this than a dress? www.gap.co.uk/gap/high-rise-wide-leg-crop-pants-in-pure-linen/000442114.html?dwvar_000442114_fit=regular&dwvar_000442114_color=000442114000&cgid=60767#mlink=EU_PD_PD1&clink=gap_070119_Sale70_PD1&start=1

op well there you go- you’re halfway there!

There are some amazing really wide trousers on toast, team with a jacket to smarted up?

@Atalune. Terrible legs so need longer if going for a dress. Love the style though but would do bright leggings etc and am trying to blend.

Have a look at Bombshell dresses (no link I'm afraid but should come up if you google it). They have some lovely special occasion outfits.

Think the toast dress fits your bill. Wear nude tights underneath for your legs.

What about Monsoon? They do lots of dresses...I am the least fashionable person I know so perhaps I’m not the best person to be making suggestions!

You could try anti-chafing shorts which are great under skirts or dresses. They’re breathable and so comfy and give a nice smoothing effect without cutting you in half. I love mine. They don’t give Spanx level of ‘control’ but for me at least they’re the best ones I’ve tried and I’ve tried loads being large of thigh.

I know it's been mentioned a few times , but the dorothy perkins plus size range has some lovely dresses in , lots of different styles - tea dresses, shurt dresses and maxis ! It's definitely worth a look, there's a sale on too so it's very reasonably priced.

next wrap dresses

Any of these dresses?

more next dresses

Someone mentioned a website pretty kitty the other day, might be something there?

Monsoon have some lovely things if they're long enough. Would also look nice with leggings/boots if that's what you're comfortable in:

uk.monsoon.co.uk/view/product/uk_catalog/mon_1,mon_1.2/6500520118

uk.monsoon.co.uk/view/product/uk_catalog/mon_1,mon_1.2/6494396118

uk.monsoon.co.uk/view/product/uk_catalog/mon_1,mon_1.2/6452240718

uk.monsoon.co.uk/view/product/uk_catalog/mon_1,mon_35/6501026118

All 'normal' but pretty, I think!

this is nice?

I think the two dresses you've ordered look perfect and very lovely.

I would support the PP who said not to go totally against your normal style. I always wear dresses to weddings etc and I bloody hate them and feel uncomfortable all day.

www.asos.com/asos-curve/asos-design-curve-kimono-pleated-maxi-dress/prd/12598575?clr=forest-green&colourWayId=16431254&SearchQuery=&cid=9577

www.asos.com/raid/raid-myla-blush-ankle-strap-suede-flat-shoes/prd/12035776?clr=be1-beige-1&colourWayId=16407223&SearchQuery=&cid=6459

Get your brows, lashes done (lvl are good) and nails. Go to Bobbi brown or Laura mercier cosmetics counter and ask for an appointment- be honest (you want a simple look, maybe eye shadow and lip gloss).

Accessories such as necklace, bracelet and watch will make you look ‘put together’. I’m sure you’ll have some lovely pieces already.

Get a good bra, shareware can be uncomfortable - if you’re not totally happy in it don’t wear it - it will make you self conscious. Just try and keep good posture and your head held high.

Try and get a blow dry on the day.

No one will notice stubble or scars - trust me! Sally Hanson airbrush is great coverage and colour and really easy to use if you want a bit more confidence!

Enjoy the day and try not to worry. Everyone will be more interested in DSD.

OP the khaki Evans dress will be perfect for you as an autumn.

OP I'm in a similar position - my DD pointed out I would definitely be the only mother at her graduation with purple hair and a nose piercing 🙄

I've been hunting everywhere (have ordered and returned most of the Internet) for a suitable dress - currently have a navy linen Jaeger sack dress. It's much more conservative than my normal style, but I don't want to embarrass her. I'm washing my hair every day to fade the purple as much as possible.

Have a look at John Lewis they have a good sale on at the moment.

I have just ordered a dress and shapewear from Bombshell - really hoping this will be 'the one'.

Good luck with your search - I feel your pain!

Am also a very generous 18

I think the best look for people of our size is simple shapes. A straight one coloured dress., maxi looks great. Buy a gorgeous jacket,eg a buttery soft biker , that you’ll wear for ever, and your flat sandals of choice. A pair of simple earrings and a good bag.. have your hair done a mani and eyebrows. Snag tights shapewear. And breathe. You will look fab.
I expect people look at you because you look interesting. You still will. Promise.

Evans khaki dress with a linen jacket?

This is comfortable and incredibly flattering.
Also something that might suit your usual style and get lots of wear out off.
www.arket.com/en_gbp/women/dresses/product.kaftan-dress-blue.0641960006.html