How can I update my look?

[Ruby789]

I look best in dresses, specifically block colours in bright primary colours done (jewel winter). Shapes that pretend to have a waist, or allow me to add one (a-line, sundress, tea, slip, wrap, sheath). Hem line is best 3 inches above the knee (maxi, midi, on the knee make me look short and dumpy). Fabrics like silk, satin, chiffon, velvet, thin knit, cotton, polyester (but not not linen, corduroy, tweed, chunky knit). Nothing loose or baggy nor clingy. Jewellery is ideally small and dainty, can wear bigger earrings in the evening and long necklaces are better than short ones. Make-up is generally like Alison Brie, but with a bright lip. Hair is trying to be like the Duchess of Cambridge but darker and no highlights (and I can’t get that shine and bounce). I wear cardigans (left open) with everything, but look much slimmer in a fitted collarless blazer (feel self-consciously too formal?). I do wear jeans and a top on weekends, typically with a silk cami or a slim knit jumper and I don’t look overdressed next to someone in a basic t-shirt. Odd as it sounds I make casual clothes look like pyjamas so have to dress everything up a bit. I’m rectangular/8 shape, biggest on the high hip.

I wanted to simplify everything and stop buying things that don’t suit me. And I’ve succeeded, but now have a new problem. I look so samey and a bit 90’s. I think because of the block primary colours and man-made fabrics, but they honestly do suit me best. I glow in electric blue, I wilt in cornflower blue.

I’m closest in style to Jess Day from New Girl (without glasses), mixed with Paige Matthews (Charmed).

How can I update this look?

I have banned myself from ever again using the words, 'I know what suits me.'
They will always come back and bite you on the arse. Always.
But it's not an exam, it's a ride.

Another place where you could start is with the cardigans. You've not described the ones you're wearing but I'm picturing short-ish, fitted, round or v-neck. I wouldn't get rid because they'll be back but I'm seeing more people wearing dresses with oversize or at least looser fitting, chunkier knits. H&M have got loads like this. They're probably shit quality but it doesn't matter when you're just trying something out. I bet they'd also look good with your jeans and camisoles. (Keep the camisoles by the way - quite a lot of them around at the moment.)

Thanks Floisme I'll look out for those. You guessed my cardigans correctly btw!

Have a look at Brooklyn Blonde too

Thanks imsorryiasked. Looks achievable!

@quatermiss I enjoyed reading your posts, found them really refreshing!
I love the Japanese aesthetic as well.

Apologies if you've already found these, but this thread is interesting for brand suggestions: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/style_and_beauty/3472030-Unusual-clothing-brands
as is this one: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/style_and_beauty/3342361-Thread-for-those-who-like-classic-minimalist-clothing

Thank you PinkysEars I hadn't found those. So many brands I didn't know existed.

Found this image online and thought it worth posting as it shows in a very simple way the difference a few tweeks can make.

This is an interesting thread. I hope you return OP and tell us if you've tried out anything new and how it went. I think if you're interested in fashion you'll feel bored and stifled with all the rules, but if you're not really that interested it shouldn't worry you that much?

I've learned tonnes by hanging out on the Parisienne threads myself. I tend to have rigid ideas about what suits me and am unwilling to step out of the box sometimes. But my choices are so limited in the shops that I bloody well have to sometimes and I can be pleasantly surprised.

I also agree that it's well worth thinking about why "flattering" and "pretty" is important to us. You don't have to be pretty. Like PP have said we project something with our clothes, just like we do with posture and demeanor - and what do we want to project? I know why I can fall into the trap of wanting things to be flattering for sure - I am on the larger size, currently needing a size 16 in pretty much all high street brands which means I'm sized out of the designers completely, so for me it's a case of "afraid of looking fat/big", which is connected to fat being undesirable in society. I was a little surprised OP, since you seem like a slip of a thing wearing size 8, that you think so much about flattering clothes. If I were you I'd go a little more mad I think! I wouldn't have the same hangups if I were smaller (but sure we all have some sort of hangups, I know).

I just think people are different I think the girl in the snooze picture looks better than in the stunning one

I agree that an edgier haircut would change things, rather than duchess of Cambridge, who lets face it has to play safe and classic!

May I ask about the closet dresses though? Is the quality good? I have seen a couple I like, but unsure what the quality of the fabric and workmanship is like (sorry for the hijack!)

The picture you showed, the tweaked picture is terrible!

Thanks for posting that link bani. I agree 100%. I feel happiest and most comfortable in wide legged trousers and a semi fitted top. Does it suit me? Make me look pretty? Probably not, because I'm short and not slim, and have a bit of a cake tummy! But I just feel like me when I dress like that!

banivani I'll have a look at the Parisienne threads you mention. I have tried several new things, i'll post a general update in a sec. The link you posted is wonderful! Thank you. I completely agree with every word. I have no hang up about being average looking, but I do have body issues. I must have made a typo somewhere, i'm a large 10 with all my weight on the upper hip / belly area. I am congratulated and asked when i'm due often, so I stick to the styles that don't seem to invite that sort of comment. It distresses me so much. I have dieted in the past, but I can't change that basic shape. My body will use fat off my earlobes and elbows and still not use that stupid pointless belly fat for fuel.

TeacupDrama and Atalune Ha well I'm still learning so lets forget I posted that.

bsc I love the versatility of my hair. It's just past my shoulders, it can be straight, curly, up, down, plaited etc... I like to try and get a bit of bounce in it like Kate, but I fall short. I would look hideous in short hair, ditto blonde or red. I could get away with a dark purple, but that would get old fast.

I have always found closet dresses well made. I have never had to send anything back for quality issues. All wash really well and are still going strong a few years later. I recommend them.

TodoDoingDone It occurs to me that frumpy is a feeling and not a style and you're right to just wear what's most 'you'.

A quick update on my shopping experience so far. So far, not great. The oversize trend is everywhere. I have tried on a few things, and haven't yet made a purchase.

I really wanted to buy something from COS, but on me, nothing looked right.

This was nice: www.topshop.com/en/tsuk/product/clothing-427/shirts-blouses-4650801/pleated-button-blouse-8358055 Might still go back for it. And there's a bag I want that i'm looking for a dupe of, the chloe marcie bag.

Jeans are the most important purchase, i'm trying lots, its a process.

Keep going OP!

love that top! Buy it.
Would love lovely with some slim leg, high waisted grey jeans rolled up a bit and some pointy sling back flats in leopard print.

It’s £25 and selling out fast by the number if unavailable sizes - buy it!

I won't JasonGideon :)

Thanks Atalune and timeisnotaline. You have persuaded me to buy it, it's on its way. Thanks for the tips to dress it up as well. I will follow to the letter.

That leads me nicely into my research ... have stalked Olivia Palermo pictures and picked a few outfits I'd like to try and do a very budget version of. I actually have more clothes that I think will work than I initially realised, with some obvious gaps for basics, like better jeans. Tops wise though, I have a few that would work.

One thing I noticed was her accessories. I Marie Kondoe'd my life and got rid of loads of bags, shoes, jackets etc.... They were cluttering up my space and weren't getting much use - largely in hindsight because they didn't suit my preference for dresses, and laziness (I use the same bag / jacket combo over and over). Such a shame. There is however something nice about having less choice in shoes and bags. I don't want to go back to how I was.

I am a high street budget sort of girl. Would going to TKMaxx and getting a couple new handbags, and New Look to get some additional shoes be a good idea? I'll pay more for jeans.

I have 6/7 light jackets and a bunch of blazers, so for now might just make do with what I have and spend the pennies on the essentials.

I know buying cheap is usually a false economy.

Thoughts?

Just to add, I won't wear leather so expensive shoes have never been worth it.

I think you sound kind of lovely in your looks, as if you know who you are.

Don’t over think it. Just buy some orange shoes or something.

Thanks MaybeDoctor :) I have a tendency to get a bit carried away.

I would get a little cross body boxy handbag. Primark or TK Maxx is a good place to look. Something in a boxy or saddle shape and maybe tan or leopard. Or you could go gold or yellow. Like this.

Thanks Atalune I'm on the look out for a bag like the chloe marcie so on the same page as you there.

Right now I have a crossbody rectangular bag in a fake grey snakeskin. It's ok and goes with everything.

Haha OP I did indeed misread your post, sorry. I can relate to your body issues. And I think it’s fine to want to “look good” I’m definitely there myself. But if you’re bored there’s a reason! I agree that you shouldn’t go mad shopping, it’s just going to be wasteful. Second hand shopping can be useful of course to try new shapes. Cos is prob a bit much to jump into when your style is so removed from that aesthetic. But consider the trousers as an alternative shape, and consider baggier tops half-tucked in to create a waist. It’s maybe a bit more current? You prob have lots of stuff you can mix and match to shake things up! Good look with jeans shopping - worst thing ever