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Original poster

So I've realised I'm actually just an old, fat woman.

109 replies

Wilburissomepig · 06/12/2017 21:23

I went out at the weekend - nothing fancy, just a meal in a nice restaurant with friends. I bought some lovely cigarette pants, great top and heels and put a lot of thought into jewellery, shoes etc and I felt great for the first time in ages. (It's been a tough year and I haven't been out much). A friend posted the most unflattering photo of me on Facebook and I could cry. Firstly because it's so clearly a terrible photograph and I would never do that to a friend (with a 'ha ha ha, not your best look' comment underneath), and secondly, mostly actually, because it's me in the photo - that's what I look like. Even when I thought I looked my best I look old and fat and I'm feeling like shit.

OP posts:
SpoonfulOfJam · 07/12/2017 20:59

I bet you looked amazing. Your clothes, your Jewellery- but anyone could replicate that. It's your confidence that made you look fab. And that's what your "friend" wanted for herself, couldn't have, so tried to ruin yours.

Thetimehascome · 07/12/2017 21:08

This is nothing do with how you look, it’s about your friend’s mean and disrespectful behaviour.

We can all look terrible in a photograph, but if you felt good before you left the house, I’m sure you did. I love a previous posters comment about losing 130lb of unwanted weight, your friend.

Izzydawg · 07/12/2017 21:40

Hi .. agree that friend wrong to post and all that but....
This happened to me with a group photo at work. Was in denial really about the amount of weight I had put on and thought was looking ok, then wham... photo appears of line up and I look as wide as this old bloke who was known for being short and fat!
Huge wake up call cos you think oh it’s just the angle then look at the other people in the photo and think oh but that’s a good likeness of them so realise that is what you do look like 😩
Was also size 14 convincing myself 12-14 when really was 14-16
Anyways took about 4 months from photo to actually doing something about it! Stuck the photo on my wall and went on 5:2 and got down to size 12
Feel a lot better and photo still on wall as reminder

littlekellysmum · 07/12/2017 22:05

Seriously, Facebook is the one that makes people feel like shit. Its always a good idea to keep control over what one shares and the time spent on Facebook. You are great looking the way you are doesnt matter whether you are fat or slim. What matters is how you feel irrespective of how to appear. Definitely you can make efforts to lose weight and look great. I am not undermining that. But I would suggest take this Facebook photo as an opportunity to change your mindset towards how you look at it. Perhaps you can look at the photo and change your feelings saying "I look great this way" something like that. Once you are sure that you feel great within yourself about how you look, you have accepted yourself the way you are. Then you can workout and lose weight. When you do this way, you still keep the "feeling good" factor while losing calories. Hope I make sense.

leftwiththedognow · 07/12/2017 22:27

I'll be fine tomorrow, I'm normally pretty self deprecating but I've taken this to heart for some silly reason

Please don't call this silly. Don't you dare let her off as some kind of your SOH failure. She gets her self esteem by knocking others. You could have been the most gorgeous woman by miles and she still would have made some remark to put you down.

papersmile · 08/12/2017 20:07

She may have put the pic up innocently, but you've asked her to take it down because you don't like it and she's ignoring your feelings.
Therefore, stick to your guns, your feelings are important and you don't deserve to be treated badly - do not be a doormat for this woman.

Also, remember we are always our worst critics.

OCSockOrphanage · 08/12/2017 21:40

I'm in *leftwiththedog". I always hate photos of me, although I think I look OK IRL. I don't photograph well and CBA to practice selfie faces.

scrabbler3 · 08/12/2017 23:31

My mum was stunning and stylish in her youth/middle-age, she strongly resembled Princess Margaret, but she has always looked manic in photos. They all look like mug shots. Her passport pic is very strange. She is computer illiterate so has never had to deal with Facebook thankfully. Some people just aren't photogenic but they are nice looking.

Ditch your match or at least distance yourself. She wants to put you in your place despite your bad year. She's poisonous.

scrabbler3 · 08/12/2017 23:32

Mate not "match"

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