Help a wedding one - Smart and elegant

[Rosa]

Wedding End of September - Up a mountain in a castle . Have been advised no heels ( or to take shoes we can change into ) . Dress code is smart and elegant. DH has a smart dark grey suit , waistcoat, tie etc . DDs I can manage . ME ? It is an afternoon ceremony with reception. and then dinner and dancing. What do I look for.? Idea I am more stuck on what the heck is smart and elegant. I can do smart for work but my navy suit will really cut it ! Oh wise mumsnetters advise me !

Some lovely dressed on Jaeger outlet that may suit. And a massive sale at the moment!

Sorry but the bride/groom are being totally unreasonable by having a dress code at all on their invitations, let alone one of "smart and elegant".

Dress codes are rude as fuck, the only exception being black tie (denoted in small letters on the bottom right of the invitation) and this is to be used ONLY when the event is truly black (or white) tie. For example think state dinners etc. Not just if the bride and groom want a posh looking wedding on a budget.

Dress codes are rude because...

1. They insult the intelligence of guests. Most adults are perfectly capable of dressing appropriately, after taking into account clues such as the formality of the invitation and the venue and/or occasion.

1. Most dress codes are demanded by the hosts in an attempt to create/force the type of event that they desire. In actual fact the guest's comfort should come first and the level of hosting should create the style of the event. Think of everything from silly fancy dress weddings to ludicrous 'black tie invited' sweet 16th parties.

1. Dress codes that are open to interpretation confuse and can even slightly distress guests. As shown in the OP above.

'Smart Elegant' is not a thing! Wear whatever you feel good in, is practical for the day, and seems appropriate for the castle venue.

I agree with you, Bitchy, but...I would also hate to feel very out of place at an event where everyone else was wearing something "smart and elegant" and I wasn't

OP - what size / shape / colourings are you? What is your budget? Any bits you particularly like to hide / accentuate?

For me I interprete it as 'we want you to look smart and make an effort, but you don't need to hire a morning suit or kilt.'

A quick google didn't really help

I tried Google at first - thats what confused me more !
I am 5ft6 on the dowhill way size wise so am about a 16 aiming for less. Have to hide upper arms ( no hope there) I look better IMO with a mid calf length . ( fit and flare A line kind of style) All the just below the knee dresses are normally on my knees and look crap. Its a Bavarian Castle so other than dressing like Heidi I have no idea what one would wear ! There will be some weathly german family members there . Budget 100-175 ideally I would like to wear it again so nothing to OTT maybe go for the simple and then accessories !

Oh blonde and heading towards 50 ........

Lederhosen?

Bargain Jaegar wrap dress

Bargain Jaegar print dress

Elegant - but not sure on the etiquette of wearing black and white to a German wedding

Beautiful - what's the weather likely to be like? May not be so good if dark and wet

Marks and Spencer!!

Fantastic sale on atm at House of a Fraser. Just bagged myself a gorgeous dress for an August wedding.

what about this?

or this?

Hairy hands- we have an informal evening the night before where traditional Bavarian attire ( or casual ) is on the invite. And I have told DH that is what he will be wearing ... Can't print the reply. I have a friedn who might lend me the dresses for the girls thing us everyone will speak to them in German of which they know zero !!!

Like the M&S one but it will be too short I was looking along those lines
Like the coast one as well
AM not a floral person !

www.houseoffraser.co.uk/Fenn+Wright+Manson+Gardenia+Dress/217035432,default,pd.html?

Plugs yes but they will be too short - But I think you have put me along the right lines !

What about this ?[[https://chescadirect.co.uk/collections/luxury-designer-plus-size-womens-dresses/products/navy-matt-crepe-crush-pleat-flounce-chiffon-trim-dress Chesca]]

Well that link diddn't work !!

Beautiful but maybe impractical if you have to do some trekking around

Longer lace dress

I got a really nice dress for a wedding from Phase Eight the other day, if you are midlands based they have an outlet at Resorts World by the NEC, I got mine for £40 when it should have been £120!

OP - the link did work! I think it's lovely! You would need to try it on to see if the ruching at the bottom fell right on you though

Exactly -- Trying on is a problem as I am in Italy !!!

I was wondering if the pleats would be too much . I am big but a big in proportion if you know what I mean and tights can hold in the flabby bits !! I love the style of the Coast one but it is not my colour this however I like as well www.coast-stores.com/p/darianna-dress/1723120

Plus Shoes cannot be heels a) as its cobblestones for getting in and b I want to dance ...As long as its not an opmpah band and waltzing !

Fit and flare bombshell dress? Good if you want A-line and arm coverage www.bombshellhq.com/collections/coming-soon/products/red-fit-flare-flatter-bombshell-dress

In your size