A Very Crepey New Year

[Cremolafoam]

Will this do ??

Oh, BTM, so sorry to hear this but yes re care. Such a long and draining road - you are amazing .

MI, I agree, try to live in the moment today, you have been away from family for a while, wobble away, be kind to yourself. I hope you can have some enchanting and peaceful moments today.

Molly, glad MN came up with the late night goods. Of course one
worries....

Rose, ds has a Birmingham offer so any thoughts welcome. It is unconditional if he puts them first so he needs to think carefully over next few months......

I'm also feeling very alone, suddenly.

I'm staying with a lifetime family friend but she was a friend of my mother's - is a very sprightly 80 year old. My lovely cousin visited yesterday but of course with her husband ill the plans to go there are scuppered. I don't find Chennai a very accessible city - I need to get out and about but it isn't easy. Am due to see another friend tomorrow (our age) but there are places I should go and I feel daunted .

So I'm skulking around exhausted and a bit isolated.

A troubled night in Crepeland Tilly I hope DS is home by now...was it dehydration? I'm so sorry you're having weather all of this. Don't lose hope. ]

And Molly are you ok? Is there anything Crepeys can do?

Cocoa I'm glad the memorial went well. Its a big deal...can you rest up for a few days now?

MI being away from home can render us vulnerable, I think. Taking away the routines of everyday life brings other stuff to the fore. It's probably healthy for the process, if not exactly enjoyable.

lalsy woo hoo re Brum offer. Ds2 absolutely loves it there...he, as you prob know accepted the unconditional offer. This after, going to the open days and applicant days...and in particular having visited the MFL dept in Cambridge and didn't really like it. The uncond. offer is only an issue if the student prefers another uni or course iyswim. As Brum turned out to be the front runner for DS2 it was made easy for us, I guess. My understanding is, if another Uni/course is to be first choice, you can still accept the Brum offer but as conditional instead. It did take a lot of the pressure off, although I expect the Uni would take a dim view of very poor grades! And DS2 seemed to put as much pressure on himself as if it were a cond. offer....What subject does your DS want to do?

I am being harassed by DD to take her shopping. She's on her week off. I really need to do some admin... And tonight I am starting a new choir...as a singer, not a director. Quite nervous actually...

MI Is there any way you can find a nice cafe with wifi and watch some lovely movies and eat nice food...?

Seconding Rose' suggestion, MI. DO something you want to do if you can, not something you ought to do. I am in awe of you travelling this long on your own!

THanks Rose, yes exactly about other courses. And it is good insurance between now and decision time anyway. He hasn't visited or looked at the course much so he needs to do that. His other options are a couple of slightly higher rated departments and a couple slightly lower - he wants to do History, for which the courses all look quite similar (core chronology and methodology and then a squillion options, which change every year) so it is hard to know what to judge on apart from that IYSWIM. Maybe we are missing something. I think he will work for the grades anyway and certainty might help him focus in a positive way. I like the idea of him not being at the end of a slow or expensive train line! But will advise him to go for the one he most wants to do of course. Glad RoseBoy is loving it so much!

If he goes to Brum Lalsy, Rose you and I should arrange meets :)

Cocoa, BTM, Colly, BD Look after yourselves.

MI "Taking away the routines of everyday life brings other stuff to the fore" What Rose said is right. If these places are ones you ought to go to for novel research, then here is my suggestion: scrawl down, stream of consciousness style, why you feel daunted by going to these places, then go to the one that seems to offer you the most without being too attached to outcome.

GGG that stew sounds fab. I love the word 'bosky'.

With regard to intimate procedures with acquaintances... DH and I will be having dinner next month with the osteo who put a finger up my bum to adjust my tailbone. (the adjustment was years ago, but this is the first dinner). It was all quite legit .

Monty - the beyond vileness of a dd that wants to be vile is horrendous, you have my sympathy.

Where else is he thinking about Lalsy? Unconditional offer from B'ham is a great position to be in!

MI - you are lacking perspective - you are truly intrepid to have made this trip on your own. Be kind to yourself - do what you can do and want to do - that will be enough.

BTM so sorry to hear about ds being in hospital- what a roller coaster for you all. Thinking of you. X

GGG, yes, very pleasing. York, Sheffield, Exeter.....Crossing everything for your lad tomorrow.

Lovely wise words from you and WAF. MI, hope you feeling more the thing now.

BTM, very much hoping today is better than yesterday....

Thanks Lalsy - it will be a relief (for him especially!) just to not have it hanging over him - whatever the outcome is- and like your ds he has 2 good offers already that he'd be very happy to accept...

Thank you lovely friends. To be fair the bits in Auroville have been very, very well looked after, not being solo! And I am surrounded by helpful rellies etc.

Got my act together to zoom off to the cathedral (a lot of churches in my novel!) and bargained the autorickshaw driver down on the way back. Chennai is actually a v friendly place if you summon your inner (and outer) Crepey and act like a determined old boot who may only speak a few words of Tamil but has a damn good Tamil-inflected English.

Glad you're feeling a bit more upbeat, MI. It's not easy, holidaying on your own, even if there are rellies about.

BTM, to hear about DS. It's the best place for him to be monitored, I guess - hope he's ready to come home soon.

Lalsy - Birmingham is a great place. DB went there. It must be a weight off getting an offer.

Herbs - how's the kitty?

GGG - does DS2 find out about Oxbridge tomorrow. then? Eeek. I don't know how competitive your two are, but it must make it a tiny bit more "important" for him, with DS1 already there.

Meanwhile, I'm breathing a sigh of relief that DD1's work experience seems finally to be sorted out. Working in the Marketing Department for a cosmetics brand - right up her street.

Rudy, the "Two-week rule" is when cancer is a possibility and so the NHS has to fast-track you within two weeks. As BTM said, this is a Good Thing, but the terror on the faces of referring doctors is in itself frightening. They may as well be measuring me up for a shroud. I ain't dead yet, Mr Youthful Doctor.

CV - cat has defied veterinary opinion, once again. This time a week ago the vet gave me a bagful of drugs, which he didn't expect would get finished, and told me to take him home for his final few days. Made an appointment for today, which we didn't expect he'd make it to.

Today's vet said: "He's a cat. They don't read the books. Have some more pills, and come back in three months."

MI - glad your inner crepey has boosted your spirits. I think you might be suffering from what is sometimes called 'homesickness'. I get this also, and it's extremely annoying, especially when one has been looking forward to being away from the place.

BTM - so sorry about DS. The constant worry and unpredictability must be so hard. Is there another step he will now take, medical help-wise?

I'm having bouts of wobbliness re parents. It's becoming apparent that mum's memory is getting to be quite a problem. At Christmas she forgot she'd invited her brother to the day (and he lives a few hours drive away), and she forgot a social engagement the other day. And she doesn't remember that she's told me various things... It's not helped by the fact that I think she's depressed, dehydrated and drinks too much wine.

Yes, I miss the three people who will annoy me senseless the minute I see them!

Herbs, my dad is being vague and forgetful too

Colly I hadn't picked up on the 2 week rule.... keeping everything crossed....

Molly, tell me if you would like me to come to the meeting and I will if I can. I am very good at consultant meetings.

Herbs - another with vague and forgetful DM. I'm also very bothered that every time I forget something I think I'm on the slippery slope. Glad the cat is hanging in there.

MI - think Judy Dench (but younger) in Best Exotic Marigold Hotel.

GGG - fingers crossed for tomorrow.

That's so lovely of you, MI, but I will have dh and he has been briefed. I really appreciate your offer, though. I have just been discussing it with the darling professor, and he has made me feel better. And I have wriggled out of some academic commitments, lol.

Thanks Crepesters!

He is still in. Which is a Very Good Thing. Also, I was at work all day, leaving DH to do what I usually have to do, which was also a Very Good Thing! Sadly, tomorrow I am back on duty (also been in to hospital this afternoon/evening, obvs!) and he most likely will be discharged - need to find out what level of care he will hopefully be getting in addition to us at home.

CV, your DD will be the envy of her friends!

Fingers crossed for your DS, GGG and yours, Beachy.

And you Molly

BTM - so sorry to hear about DS but am pleased that at least you were able to stay at work knowing he was being cared for and DH doing what you usually do. Thinking of you.

Very good luck to everyone waiting for results.

MI - I feel for you - having space and time to think can bring out difficult thoughts and feelings.

Lalsy - congrats on Brum. hear nothing but good things about it and apparently the university has its own railway station. Is this really true BD and Rose?

Laptop buggered atm; have lots loads of emails etc (so my entire financial history and arrangements) and software I use for working from home. Dammit.

If I didn't say it before - thank you everyone for tips on Northumberland. Really looking forward to it.

Molly, MI is also very good at post-hospital visit gin plying. She was also very good at organising me and finding me someone to email when I was rendered hysterical upon receiving, post-biopsy, a letter that told me that "the earliest possible appointment has been made for you at the insert name of cancer unit." Which makes you think the absolute worst, and the news, while not the absolute best outcome, was the least worst. (I finally got hold of a nurse and made her tell me on me on the phone, shouting down her protestations that "the consultant likes to discuss these things face to face.") We Crepeys are made of strong stuff.

Had an interesting day at work today. It is particularly interesting to see how many people think my job belongs to them once it becomes exciting.

Interview for job later this week. Will know outcome next week.

Hoorah for Herbycat, defying the odds! May he live to purr a little longer!

Good that your DH is not useless, BTM, and also good that your DS is being looked after in hospital while he needs it.

DD1 has an interview with Leeds and is still waiting to hear from Bristol and Warwick. But reasonably low offer from Lancaster, and she thinks she would be happy to go there.

MI - I know the "daunted" feeling, and I think you get it particularly when you are on your own. When I was in Geneva last year, I had no interest in going out on my own (or indeed with colleagues), but slumped in my hotel room with room service. I know Geneva well, having spent a disproportionate amount of time at the WTO, but it just seemed too much effort to go out and find a nice restaurant. My good friend had also left a few months before, and I had no-one to drag me out to play either. Once I get out, I am usually fine, it's just the sheer effort of planning to do something and doing it.