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Original poster

Should Your Partner Buy You A Dress?

37 replies

Mantis1975 · 21/10/2016 20:46

What's the opinion on male partners buying their other half clothes, in particular dresses.
My wife had a huge debate with herself every time she goes to buy a dress but I've seen women saying they'd love their partner to buy them one ala so many movies.

This seems a recipe for disappointment but I was wondering your thoughts.

OP posts:
WhisperingLoudly · 21/10/2016 20:56

I like choosing my own dresses - most stuff needs trying on and it'd be unlikely that something would be a great fit through sheer chance.

I do however enjoy being bought bags/jewellery/scarves/coats etc

bingohandjob · 21/10/2016 21:13

My husband, with the best will in the world, wouldn't have a f!cking clue. But, God love him, he knows this and he clocks where I buy my favourite stuff from and often buys me a voucher for that shop to choose myself something which I think is really thoughtful.

Arfarfanarf · 21/10/2016 21:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

burnishedsilver · 21/10/2016 21:30

It's a nice gesture if you're good at picking things that you know she'd like. It's not an easy thing to get right.

JoJoSM2 · 21/10/2016 21:30

They probably have a romantic vision of a prince turning up on a white horse with a spectacular ball gown and whisking them away to a ball... In reality, I think it is a recipe for disaster. Having said that, I love it when my husband takes me shopping. We make a nice day out out of it (for me anyway :P). I get to try a lot of stuff on and he'll buy me things that look good + take me out for a fancy lunch in between shops :) I get treated like that 1 or 2 times a year as a b-day/Christmas prezzie etc.

OhTheRoses · 21/10/2016 21:36

Hmm.. My DH only personally buys his suits and that's because his tailor goes to his office.

I really wouldn't want him buying my clothes. He was once asked to buy me a handbag. He said which one. I said Enny (remember anyone). He bought me a Jane Shilton thing with gilt. I asked why and he said "you said any bag".

A frock, no thanks.

unicornsarenotjustforchristmas · 21/10/2016 21:36

I wouldn't trust dh to pick me clothes. And I won't choose for him either. Clothes are such individual choices, you'd have to know your partners style very very well.
However, if you wife (or husband or general significant other) had clearly seen an article of clothing that they wanted, but couldn't justify buying for themselves, then I think it is perfectly acceptable to buy that to surprise them.

WhooooAmI24601 · 21/10/2016 21:40

Nope nope nope. DH is great at so many things but, having spent some time with him recently in the handbag section of Selfridges (I was weeping over the Mulberry bags because they are beautiful and bring me joy) and he was marching about trying to hurry me up by holding aloft all sorts of gaudy shite shouting "is this it, is this the one you want, can we go to Krispy Kreme now?" He would pick something hugely vile.

On the other hand, I buy him clothes sometimes and he loves it. Because if I didn't he'd still wear stuff from his Uni days (his t-shirts are now crop-tops but according to him "still have loads of life in them").

LifeLong13 · 21/10/2016 21:42

My DH has brought me clothes before and he is very good at it. Shoes tho...no!

Judydreamsofhorses · 21/10/2016 21:45

My partner has only ever bought me clothes when we've been out and I've really liked something but not been able to afford it - but I'd usually pay him back come payday unless a gift occasion was coming up. He is brilliant at jewellery though, and has got me some amazing things over the years which have been just perfect. I buy him stuff often for Christmas/birthday - mainly because he would never buy himself any new clothes, ever.

Original poster
Mantis1975 · 21/10/2016 21:45

I agree. It really seems like too much of a gamble but, as I said, I heard women saying they'd love it.
I buy my wife t-shirts or sweaters because these are pretty straight forward when it comes to sizing etc. (Though I do still tend to buy too small :/)
Dresses seem like Russian Roulette with 5 bullets instead of 1.

With the added risk that even if the dress is right you had better have somewhere to wear it to arranged.

OP posts:
Judydreamsofhorses · 21/10/2016 21:47

Ha ha, whooooo, my partner also has uni t-shirts still. He is now 40. I have introduced a one in/one out policy, and also stealthily appropriated some as bed wear.

PickAChew · 21/10/2016 21:49

I'd think DH had been drinking the funny juice if he went out and bought me a dress. He's never bought me clothes in the 14 years we've been together and I can count the number of occasions in that time period when I've worn a dress on the fingers of one hand (with no need to use thumbs)

I owuld say that buying your partner clothes is a bit odd, anyhow, but that would be hypocritical of me, since I threw a sweater for him that I knew he'd like into an M&S order, yesterday! He had mentioned that he needed a new smart-ish jumper for work, happened to squish a rather nice one, well within his taste parameters, in store, yesterday and was planning on using the sparks 20% of to stock up on a few bits, anyhow, so it was more of an opportunist essentials purchase than choosing something that I'd like to see him in. I think that may be where the difference lies.

PickAChew · 21/10/2016 21:54

And yes, buying something that was clearly wanted, as a gift is a nice thing to do. My reservations come in where there's an element of control to the purchases.

Pisssssedofff · 21/10/2016 22:15

Well my boyfriend at the time last Christmas did this. The dress was expensive, polyester, hideous and went back to the shop and was swapped for running gear. He also bought a Victoria secretes bikini suitable for a 20 year old porn star, again hardly cheap but bloody hell.
We split up very quickly

Original poster
Mantis1975 · 21/10/2016 23:04

pisssssedofff
Hahaha I expected there'd be tales of disappointing gifts but didn't think there'd be break ups too.

OP posts:
RJnomore1 · 21/10/2016 23:09

My DH has excellent taste and often buys me lovely clothes that I would never have bought myself. Jumpers, dresses, coats, boots - I trust his judgement and its lovely to have someone buy you something without having to go hunt for it yourself.

I however would never buy him anything other than underwear as he is so pernickety!

LifeIsGoodish · 21/10/2016 23:24

I don't think dh has ever bought me a garment. I'm afraid that if he did I'd end up looking either like his mother or like a 5yo!

But I do love going clothes-shopping with him. If I am clear about what I'm after, he attacks the task with military precision, searches out things for me to try, gives considered opinions on what I try on, and we always find something suitable.

HalloToJasonIsaacs · 21/10/2016 23:29

Dear heavens no. DH once bought me a fluffy dressing gown for Christmas (at my specific request). That was a great success to the extent that my DMIL asked for one just like it as a birthday present. But anything requiring more dress sense than that would be out of the question.

BeastofCraggyIsland · 22/10/2016 00:14

I dread to think what I would end up with if DP went dress shopping (if the shock of him voluntarily going into a clothes shop didn't kill me). He has absolutely zero interest in clothes unless they are of the intensely practical variety - which to be fair is my general preference too, I only wear dresses to weddings. We have a bit of a double standard thing going on though as I quite often buy him clothes (I'm replacing the huge collection of 10-15 year old t-shirts that he is inexplicably attached to by stealth - one in one out). He will happily buy things for me but only if I pick out the actual item I want and hand it to him; he's an intelligent and capable bloke but when it comes to women's clothing he literally wouldn't have the tiniest clue.

SallyR0se · 22/10/2016 00:23

He once bought me a men's onesie because he couldn't translate women's sizes. Reckoned I'd be a Medium (good guess, I'm 10-12). It was only when I put it on I realised that something was amiss... No space for my bum!

JaceLancs · 22/10/2016 01:19

Yes I remember Enny - I had a few purses and 2 handbags made by them, beautiful quality
No DP would not buy me a dress or jewellery - paying for it is another matter, often I will see something and feel I can't really justify the price or need for it and if he can afford it and wants to treat me he will
The only surprise present he makes is perfume both for me and DD and he is always spot on even when it's something I wouldn't have chosen it really does suit me
DP and DS often go xmas and birthday shopping together for me and DD and I really appreciate this as he is not their father and we don't live together

ItGoesWithoutSaying · 22/10/2016 07:36

Like RJno also have a DH who buys me things. He likes clothes, knows my style, size and where I shop so usually gets it right. Sometimes he's bought me something that I wouldn't have picked myself and it looks really good. Other times, there have been mistakes! (He always keeps the receipt in case it has to go back or get exchanged.)

I also buy clothes for him.

chanie44 · 22/10/2016 08:12

I prefer to buy my own clothes as I like what I like!!! I wouldn't mind is OH wanted to buy me a pair of jeans, t shirt, jumper etc, but I think dresses can be difficult to get right.

In saying that, OH hates shopping and I act as his personal shopper and will show him things he may like and let him try them on.

ChishandFips33 · 22/10/2016 08:35

There's a programme in TV doing just this - DH's raid their wives wardrobe, throw out whatever they don't like and then begin buying what they want to see her in they think she would look good in

One outfit the wife HAS to wear on a date ShockConfusedHmmBlush

Big fat fail for the one I watched - mum of 2 or 3 LO's in her 30's, desperately busy juggling everything and he bought lots of hot pants/mini skirts and skyscraper heels for everyday wear Grin

The show host then sorted him out!

If you do buy one just be prepared it may not be right and don't be huffy about it - it's a very personal thing

I would prefer a day out shopping
with a simple lunch and make a morning/day of it - the time spent together would mean more