S&B 101 what fugliness would you put in? (lighthearted!)

[LazySusan11]

I'd have to ban Crocs, unless they're on small children.

Impulse body spray..stinks

Anyone else?

hazeyjane does the rest of your ensemble look a bit like this?

Surely crocs are like pyjamas - they have a designated usage time and place, which is in your own home/garden in case of crocs. I have 2 pairs, one at front door, one at the back, so I can just slip them on when I step out. I would not actually go out where people can see me though.

By the way, this model is much nicer than the original clog
www.crocs.co.uk/womens-crocs-freesail-clog/200861,en_GB,pd.html?cid=410&cgid=women-footwear-clogs#start=22

Cotton maxi dresses as day wear.

I have other things I really don't like - mostly to do with too much makeup, tattoos and piercings - but the summer maxi dress is the most heinous of them all to me.

hazeyjane: judging from the stripy socks and the first part of your name I will be disappointed if the rest of the outfit doesn't look like what this young lady is wearing.

Cotton maxi dresses remind of old Flake ads, where some blonde lovely would be sitting in the back of a lovely gypsy caravan. And Timotei ads, I'm sure they were fond of the old cotton maxi dresses too.

In my dreams Mitzi, in my dreams.

To be fair these are my, schlepping about the garden, camping, beach crocs.

I have a yellow pair for hospital stays

And a pair with fleecy linings for in the house

I really like crocs

Jinkies, I had erased Hayzee blooming Fantazee from my brain. Now I have John Wayne is Big Leggee going through my head. Curse you.

I'm going to put ALL NIGHTWEAR in, please! As a pp said, all 'nighties' or nightshirts seem to involve cartoon characters (wtf???) or be short sleeved or sleeveless. Or SHORT. I have middle aged legs, ARGH. This is a bugbear of mine.

I need a long or three quarter sleeved nightdress in thick cotton in a solid colour, which comes to on or just below the knee. Cut well.

Or I need PJs which aren't in grim candy colours with roses or bows, which size up too bloody small and tight. I don't want TIGHT pjs at night which get tangly. Nor do I want a bloody VEST TOP! Whose house is so hot they can wear this at night?!

I'm 40 and my arms get cold. I have saggy boobs following two kids and lumps and bumps;. why is everything skin tight??? I need flattering looser cuts. Someone somewhere make some decent nightwear!! Where are the middle of the road, reasonably fitted pjs in classy colours, not awful twee prints like we are 11?

Maybe there's a market out there..........I can't afford 50£ for a pair of PJs and frankly M&S are letting me down. Rant over. Excuse excessive exclamation marks.its been niggling me for a while!

Buns in hair. Specifically those buns that look like someone has plopped an actual bread bun on the person's head, centre-top. (Not messy buns and I don't even mind man buns just those big round buns).

Also the hairstyle favoured by Kylie in Coronation St. She looks like an Uruk-hai from 'Lord of the Rings'. Why do women think that weird peak of hair looks good?

High heels. Uncomfortable, impossible to walk in and make you look stupid. Just put on something comfortable and walk faster, ffs.

Vans, those horrible thin cotton ones; on men especially.
Scouse brows, wtf?
Pointy nail.
Thin leggings on larger ladies.
Uggs, ok on kids.
Droopy tracksuits.
Oversized tacky handbags.
Big beards on young men.
Tunics, although I like the " loud" ones.

I am well known for wearing nothing but dog walking gear 24/7 so realise that I am not really allowed an opinion, but I have one anyway...

BRAS ON SHOW. Yes, it may be very pretty, love, but I don't really want to be staring at your underwire and boob-bulge when I'm serving you at the till. Especially when your strap is hanging off one shoulder and I'm afraid that, at any second, it's going to slide right down and you're going to tit-flash me.

I love my DH in short sleeved shirts - but then he does have lovely big strong arms and shoulders.... maybe they could be banned on the weedy-armed types?

Sorry LaConnerie big arms, small arms, it doesn't matter. They're all going in my room 101.

In fact that Dr Christian person who looks at people's damp orifices on TV for a living is one of the worst offenders!

Ten times the horror.

And don't even start me on Hawaiian shirts..........

agree.....leggings pretty yucky but what s the alternative? Aged 58....short and about 10 stone and feel the cold.....any suggestions PLEASE

How could I forget cap sleeves and tankinis? Both hideous.

What's wrong with HD brows, though? Surely HD is just the brand, not the type of brow? I have seen people with lovely natural-looking brows by HD.

Thinking of brows, can I also add: groomed brows on men. Sorry, I know that's sexist... It just looks wrong.

The alternative is not wearing leggings, randomer! Tights? Trousers?

What is wrong with a tankini? Surely it is just a swimming costume it is easier to go to the loo in? Could someone explain, please?

Skinny jeans or good quality opaque tights both look better than leggings.

YSL Touche Eclat under the eyes. The clue is in the word highlighter. You all look like pandas in negative.

White Stuff cotton tunics. Over leggings. The tunic doesn't make your arse look smaller and the leggings don't make your legs look thinner. Trust me.

Maxi dresses on anyone under 5ft 10 and weighing more than 3 stone. See above re: leggings and white stuff. It's a sure fire way to spot the British tourist in the Med. Here comes flowery-tent-person.

Handbags with studs, and diamondy things, and tassles.

Any of those 48 bazillion pink smelling perfumes that young whippersnappers are all wearing. Bin the lot and buy one fucking bottle of something decent. It doesn't even have to be ££££s. Yardley Jade smells like Cristalle FFS.

Hair like Jax on Holby has/had (is she still alive?) That straight droopy curtain thing. Makes your face all elongated and camel-esque.

Beige anything. Wtf is beige for? Huh? To make you look slightly less dead than a very dead thing? it flatters no-one. No-one.

I am of course an absolute goddess as I sit here in my Asda jumper and my M & S joggers

Yes, HD brows are fine (a la Angelina Jolie) I think it's the Scouse Brow you're all thinking of ...

Eczema.

Not necessarily scouse brows but any brow that looks obviously tattooed on. Even the slim ones. Shiny eyebrows look strange!

Big beards on young men.

OMG yes, I hate it when their face is all peachy and young and they're obviously about 22, then dangling off it is Charles Darwin's beard. Ugh.

I can't even bear to look at those eyebrows!

Hate -
Uggs - they are like bootee slipper
Men in leggings, no idea if they are leggings but they look like Max Wall in them (if you are under 50 you might have to google what he used to wear...)

What hasn't been mentioned is -
swimsuits with ridiculous cut outs all over. Even if you are 6' and a size 10, I hate them
Brogues. This is my absolute favourite NO. Why do you want to look like a man?
Beanies when it's not cold. No no no
Shorts with the pockets hanging out at the bottom. Why?
Stupid sunglasses. Can't explain exactly what. Cheryl Doodah had a pair on in a pic with her husband, awful metal rimmed so say bang on trend things