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Original poster

Though She Be Crepey, She Is FIERCE!

999 replies

QueenQueenie · 26/07/2015 17:14

Ta Da!

OP posts:
Rosebag · 13/08/2015 23:45

Blimey it's nearly midnight...is anyone else awake?

bigTillyMint · 14/08/2015 01:00

Oh Rose, it's happening fast isn't it? I hope your DM will agree to more care. Would they fit hoists too?

YANBU for wanting a break. Surely they can/will have to cope without you?

Blackduck · 14/08/2015 07:11

Rose much strength. Wondering how long before we hit that point with mum.
Congrats on results Molly but sorry to hear about accident - hope dd and you will be okay soon.

Here ds off camping (looks at torrential rain) and I can't wait for 4.00 so I can draw a line under this week.

cremolafoam · 14/08/2015 07:28

Oh Rose, I hope you had the sleep of sleeps last night. Such a lot weighing on you atm.
Have the dps had a social car plan drawn up.? If not it sounds like they need one done,based on the new situation. My mother was and would be exactly the same about my own ddad, and it made her ill last time. It took everything dsis and I had to get her to relent to outside help. I know that thing of not wanting strangers in your own home etc.
Whatever do not feel guilty. You have enough on your plate, I hope you can get away. You deserve a break after yesterday.

BD - much strength to you today.

cremolafoam · 14/08/2015 07:29

*care plan not car planShock

NUFC69 · 14/08/2015 07:30

Really fed up with posts disappearing; it's happening all the time and I don't find out until later. So, from yesterday: sorry about the results, Stropps, but DD does seem to be reacting quite well, congrats to Crepeys ' DC on their results. I hope DD's hand is feeling a bit better now. Sorry if I have missed other things.

Molly, sorry to hear about DD's accident: I hope you're both feeling better today. Rose, what an awful situation to be in: I hope it can be resolved short term so you can get away, and long term so DPs are content. BD, counting down the hours with you. Thanks

bigTillyMint · 14/08/2015 07:37

Yes NU, Angry Re the posts.

Worst weather of the whole holiday this afternoon - heavy rain. We decided on a shopping trip for DD to buy presents. NZ is NOT the place to go shopping but I did manage to help her find some suitable stuff and she is now a bit happier. DS and DH were not deterred by the rain and spent an hour in the outdoor hot pool when we got back Grin

We are now watching rugby on TV as they decided the weather is to grim for them to venture out to a real life local game Confused

hattymattie · 14/08/2015 08:02

Rain here too Tilly and predictions of early October temperatures but I am happy - I slept.

Milly and Mrs S - agree - it's awful when DC's are injured - DD2 got a minor dog bite on her leg a few weeks ago and I was more traumatised than her. Blender incident sounds like a horror movieShock .

Well done to Molly's DD on results and hope Stropps and Rose's DC's have partied and slept (a little).

BD - hope things are looking up a little - work situation seems dreadful.Thanks

RoseSad - re DF - sounds like he really needs proper full time care. Very difficult I know but the best for all concerned - even DF. To are not selfish for wanting to go to your bolt hole. Hope you have a better day.

I am going to go shopping with DD1 today - the dregs of the sales. She needs some vaguely acceptable clothes as she has an internship at Cambridge next week. She's heading back on the bus much to her annoyance - I think I've probably moaned enough about Eurostar prices. Have discovered that Air France do under 25 discounts but the tickets are only available on their site not the booking sites. Some of the prices are not bad.

Rosebag · 14/08/2015 08:04

Thank you, dear Crepeys. I slept badly but am full of resolve (having discussed this with DBIL whose DM had severe dementia before she died only a few months ago,) that if DM won't accept the help…and accept that it's really gone beyond what anyone can do in their flat, I have to withdraw. What she's running around, doing for him has been fantastic in a way, but is actually obstructing what he needs and making her ill. He is increasingly immobile, doubly incontinent, and has confusion. He needs to be in a home. Like I said six of us (the very part time carer came round last night to help) couldn't manage it. Crem there will be a plan, but the soc worker is away til next week, however I'm calling the duty desk and asking them to arrange respite. If DM won't have it there's nothing more I can do.

I felt so terrible when I got home last night…we'd had to leave DD on her own and she was crying in bed. She doesn't like being alone at night. No harm done, in the grand scheme of things but still…

Not sure if I'll get away today…the plan was me and DD drive down today, with DH and DS joining us by train later, and DFriends who will be at their flat nearby, coming for supper. May have to delay.

Tilly if its any consolation it's been bucketing down here for 2 days….

beachyhead · 14/08/2015 08:08

Well, you can join us in heavy rain, BTM. Dd1 got her results yesterday; AAD, with the A's in the pure, non writing Arts subjects, so no surprises there! It doesn't make a difference to September, still off to Art School and we will do the UCAS form next year (if she decides to go down that route).

Everyone well done on results and well done Stropps for the first 24 hours survival. Will the school be any good on advice? I would say drop to three and retake 2 or 3 of the AS's if she can. When is the AS level going to be dropped? That may influence her decision. If it is next year, she could drop down and do a straight two year run on three subjects?

Molly, I'm sorry to hear about your dd's accident - always such a shock.

Rose, please come - we can have breakfast again......

hattymattie · 14/08/2015 08:14

Great news and congratulations to DD1 - BeachySmile.

bigTillyMint · 14/08/2015 08:31

Rose, that sounds like a good plan - what a stressful situation. And your poor DDSad Can I ask how you managed to get a social worker involved?

Well done Beachys DD - great results!

MrsS how is your DD? And Molly, I hope your DD (and you) are recovering OK.

motherinferior · 14/08/2015 08:40

Wow. Just wow: heard from Molly's and my friend whose little girl died. It was their daughter's birthday yesterday...so they took a whole bunch of kids out for the day and then fed them all. Am in awe.

And my blind friend who came round last night is having twins....

Rosebag · 14/08/2015 08:44

Oh I will beachy I will. I need Sussex....it's synonymous with sanity for me. Will be in touch.

Tilly over a year ago I did the referral myself when DM was in hospital for a revision of her knee replacement and DDad wasn't coping. But it's within a very well organised and funded faith organisation although the SWs are local authority funded. As far as I know in any circumstances you can self refer. If we didn't have this organisation I'd have looked up the number of the local authority covering my parents patch, and called them. Otherwise the Gp or the geriatric consultant can do it. Similarly most hospitals have a social work team who will refer to the community team as needed. I'm sure it's not always smooth, though.

I have shouted at DH. I better apologise, hadn't I...

bigTillyMint · 14/08/2015 08:50

Thanks Rose Smile

Depends on what you shouted at him forWink

MI that is, indeed. inspiring.

motherinferior · 14/08/2015 09:01

Mr Inferior has upgraded the computer. He left blithely telling me this morning "if it hasn't finished soon, just work on the portable". My work is not stored on the portable. Rose, can you go to his work and shout at him too?AngryAngry

MrsSchadenfreude · 14/08/2015 09:20

Ha, yes. Had that one, MI. Also "My computer's upgrading, can you please make sure you turn it off before you go to work, as it will have finished the upgrades by then." It hadn't, so I didn't turn it off. Came home to "Why didn't you turn my laptop off?" Was I supposed to wait patiently until it had finished, and be late for work?

beachyhead · 14/08/2015 09:36

OMG, the very idea of MrBeachy upgrading the computer is too frightening to imagine Grin

Dd1 is at a very scary festival this weekend, between me and Stropps. It has a bad reputation for illegal substances, which I know she will not partake in (not because she's an angel, because she doesn't like them!), but it makes for an interesting collection of party goers, all 25,000 of them!

Stropperella · 14/08/2015 09:39

Molly, very well done to your dd on her results. How awful about the accident - very traumatic for all of you. Hope she is fully recovered soon.

Beachy, lovely set of results there for your dd. Big congrats. Which college is she going to?

No sign of dd yet. I'm assuming she'll get a taxi back to town, although whether she was organised enough to take any money with her, I don't know. I have to say that I honestly have no clue about what she is going to do about school etc. Everything hinges on whether she decides to face reality or not. She really is very academically able and sets herself very high targets but is unable/unwilling to do the work required. She missed alot of school pre-GCSEs and never did her homework then either, but did well enough. She does have some er, idiosyncrasies, which mean that she rejects a lot of standard logical solutions out of hand. This also means that she very often says one thing and does another. She also suffers from more than averagely bad mood swings. Being consistent is not her thing. Sadly, much of this stuff is inherited from her parents. I never grew out of my teen difficulties and neither did her father. As someone who has a great talent for digging herself into a hole, if you gave her a ladder to get out of the hole, dd is quite likely to climb out of said hole, go and get a bigger shovel, climb back down and carry on digging. I've been awake since 5, worrying that she is setting herself on a course to nowheresville and won't do the necessary to turn things around.

Rose, hope you manage to get away today. Your Dm has to accept that they need proper help before anyone can do any more, I'd guess.

Stropperella · 14/08/2015 09:41

Hope it's not a mud bath, Beachy!

bigTillyMint · 14/08/2015 10:26

Beachy, my DD has mentioned that she is going to a certain festival on the Aig BH at least eleventy million times this weekend. I pray she enjoys it.

Stropps, it is not surprising that you are worrying. It is what we mums do bestSmile
And tell me about DDs and mood-swingsHmm

bigTillyMint · 14/08/2015 10:28

That'll be Aug BH and this holiday!

motherinferior · 14/08/2015 11:35

I am putting off packing.....

beachyhead · 14/08/2015 11:37

Ds has gone on 'not a date' Smile I could smell the aftershave as he cycled off down the drive!

bigTillyMint · 14/08/2015 11:44

Beachy I was just thinking how it was quite late to be going out on 'not a date', but actually it's quite early in UK Smile

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