Are there any bra gurus about? I need some help.

[MrsKoala]

I posted this on a bra thread in chat but no one answered so I thought I would see if there was anyone else who could help me. Or perhaps my tits are so bizarre they are beyond help!

I am 37 under and 41 around nipple leaning over. This should make me a 36d, which is what I wear. But none actually fit me. They are all baggy in the cup and cut across into the top of my boob. My boobs don't touch the inside of the bra at all and the wire is about an inch below the bottom of my boob.

I am broad shouldered, my boobs have a wide shallow shape from birds eye view and are conical from the sides. I have done a diagram.

Please, if anyone has any suggestions (other than surgery) I would really appreciate it.

Cheers.

I haven't seen the first two to know whether they're padded as they don't come in my size sadly... Don't let that put you off though- unless you're worried about nipple show- the shaping will do the job regardless.
I've got a variant of the last one, it falls off my shoulders but that's one of my issues!

I do really prefer a light padding for a couple of reasons - i am uneven so need to put a pad in the left side and i find a bit of padding helps as i can look lumpy on the padded side and i have one inverted nipple and one quite sticky outy one, which really shows thru non padded bras. I wouldn't mind if both were sticky out, but just one looks really bizarre.

My boobs really are a total mess and i am hoping to get them sorted out in a couple of years.

Thanks for all your help everyone. I will look on the JL website too as i didn't realise i cold use vouchers online. (i don't have a big budget atm)

MrsK, an inny nipple and uneven breasts (which everyone has to some degree) does not make your breasts a "total mess". I'm sure to everyone else you look beautiful. .

Update

I went to oxford st tOday and went to JL and hof. I found nothing in JL ( I have realised what's the problem - because my breast are so wide the under wire is stretched very far and the material is pulled so taut across my boob at the top so it cut in. The cup is rolling inwards on itself. It happened with all the 'half cup bras I tried too.) and then left feeling quite tearful and frustrated.

Then I went to hof and tried quite a few on and no half cups fit me there either. But what did seem to fit was triangle style (this it the bikini type I wear anyway, but I never considered it for a bra).

I ended up getting this this and this . I know they are cheating and more like teenagers training bras, but they really were the only thing which fit and I am so desperate now as I'm wearing the nude one every day which looks ridiculous.

How is that cheating? I'd love to be able to wear bras like that. If they fit and are comfortable, then that is great. They all look really attractive too, they aren't ugly or schoolgirly.

I also think there is a lot of focus on wires when not all women need them. My mother hasn't worn wired bras ever, aside from a few strapless ones in the 50s. And her breasts look normal for an 83 year old, they haven't dropped down to her knees or anything!

I suppose it feels like they aren't really the sophisticated/sexy/grown up bras of an adult woman. I will still extend my search for the holy grail of a 'proper' half cup bra, but these are fine to tide me over till then.

I think I need a very very very low half cup, almost a kind of agent provocateur type sex bra to actually fit me!

The wired one is very grown up. And the lace one is sexy, my DH would love me to wear something like that! The grey one is simple and simple looks sexy enough in a sophisticated way. I used to have a very sheer bra the shape of the wired one and I loved it but I am a bigger cupsize now, and can't ever get bras like that to fit me.

The lace one probably would look sexy if I had any boobs to put in it. On me it looks very pubescent and a bit creepy.

The blue is 36c and the dkny and lace one is medium.

The problem I have now is that all my clothes are incompatible with this shape (deep round necks) so I think most will show.

Have you tried freya patsy bra? Bravissimo do D cups.

I'm a 28dd but they do a D too.

Yes I tried it today and it still dug in and the cup was baggy. I think I really am not a d cup, none actually have ever fit me. I am almost flat as a board. It's totally bizarre. I was looking at my braless body today and it really is peculiar for someone who 's fleshy and quite curvy all over to be so lacking in the boob dept.

Not sure what size you are vix, but these go up to an ff and they look pretty sheer and sexy. The lace bra I bought is just in a s, m, and l, I fit with stretchy room in the large and I am 41 over bust.

I wore the dkny bra today under a long sleeved tight t-shirt and felt comfortable. But i noticed my tits were being looked at with a cats bum face by my mum. When I asked why she was looking at my boobs, she said 'is that one of your new bras then? She thinks the completely ill fitting nude bra I was wearing gave me more 'shape', ie a totally fake and unsupportive bra protruding ridiculously under my clothes.

She is right in a way, for the first time I'm not padded and pushed out up to the eyeballs and my clothes really do hang differently on me now. But I'm just not comfortable wearing such a lot of padding anymore. I know it suits my frame and curves to look like I have more up top, but I'm sick of faking and being uncomfortable. I'm nearly 40, I've had 2 children, I've recently lost 23lb, I do Pilates and I have accepted my bad boobs, good legs, tall, broad body.

She has said she's going to look in primark for some padded bras for me tho I told her they won't fit, but i bet she still does.

A slight hijack, my apologies op.
If I am a 39 round my back and a 45 round my boobs bent over what size should I wear

I like that bra OP, I'm a 28GG/H though.
OP I think you would suit the sort of bra that was popular in the 70s, simple triangle cupped bras with no wires but darting which gave shape. Often in really sheer netty fabrics. I never see bras like this now but will have a good search online and see what I can find.

Evilpixie you could try 40E or 38F as a starting point.

Dear MrsKoala,

This thread was bought to our attention and we would really like to help you.

We are very sorry that the bras you purchased from us aren’t quite right and that you have had trouble finding a good fit. We would like to invite you into the R&P store of your choice for a fitting with one of our most senior stylists and some VIP treatment!

We would really like to find you the perfect fit! However, if you are still not happy, we would be more than happy to refund the bras you purchased from us.

Please email our customer services team at [email protected] and we will organise an appointment for you.

We look forward to hearing from you!

Kindest regards,

R&P

That's very kind of you. Thank you very much. I hope you don't think i was disappointed in the fitter, she was lovely and made me feel like

Sorry. Posted too soon

like my boobs weren't dreadful. It was more my mutant body i was disappointed with.

anyway i am very grateful and crying more than a little overwhelmed with your generous offer.

i don't know how soon i will be able to attend as i am sadly in the middle of a family bereavement.

thank you once again.

Awwww, lovely service from R&P.

MrsK have a browse on here www.journelle.com/ They have some really stunning soft cup bras in the sale, and other very skimpy wired cups that also might work for you. I really wish I could wear some of their wireless bras.

Oh they are lovely vix thanks. But I've just chosen a few then realised that they don't ship to the UK. :(

Don't they? How annoying, I am sorry. There was something I wanted to buy too. Maybe note the brand and style and then google as they do stock a lot of UK and European brands like Fleur of England etc, so a UK website will probably stock it.

this is the one I wanted . I already have it in a pale pink in a 36d. It used to fit well but since I've lost weight/volume after bfing it is too loose. But I know the shape works, so it's just the size. I shall have a google around.

Oh I've found it, on the l'agent website, for only £12! I've ordered it and another similar, so fingers crossed they fit. Thanks.

UPDATE:

Hi all, i thought i would come back and update. I had my bra fitting at Rigby and Peller. The lady who did it was very nice. She had seen this thread and knew that the bras i had didn't fit me. She was very knowledgable and said i wasn't a 36d (which is what i measure at), we tried a variety of bras in 36c. Only 2 fit me, and i bought them ( a lovely pink one and a dark green one ).

The nice lady also had suggestions on how we could arrange to have some padding added to some pretty 'soft' triangle type bras which would be more for my every day life style (rolling round the floor with 2 small dc). She also said the ones which did fit me could be ordered in other colours, like white/blush/nude - which is more practical, but less nice than the teal/shocking pink ones i bought.

All very good. The only downside is the price! I spent the best part of 300 on 2 bras and a pair of knickers And because of this i haven't actually worn them yet and i am a bit scared of them . They are still in the bag wrapped up with all tags still on as i just can't bring myself to wear them. I know i am being a twat as i can afford them and i have spent more on umpteen bras which don't fit over the years and cause me horrendous discomfort and embarrassment. But it just feels so extravagant. I know i need to take a deep breath and just WEAR THEM!

I know i know, i'm a total prat.

Anyway, the service was very good and the very lovely R&P lady said she would stay in touch, gave me her personal details and had some ideas about future bras which might fit/suit me. She will keep me posted on future bras and styles and ideas which might fit my bizarre shape. She also said i was way to hard on myself and critical of my crap boobs. Which was nice.

Oh and very generously R&P has offered a refund on the flesh coloured bra i bought (see upthread) as she says it is just all wrong. All i have to do is find it now and send it to her. That's if i didn't bin it straight after posting this thread - doh! Ah well. It's a lovely offer anyway. And way more than i expected, as i am the one who bought the thing and i did wear it after all.

So all in all a good result. Thanks all for your advice. :)