How to achieve the middle class / posh girl look and lifestyle?

[stuckonchapterone]

Hello everyone.

I was seen, and read some threads similar to this, however I was wondering whether anyone could give me some advice, it would be much appreciated

I have long been a 'fan' of the posh / middle class fashion look e.g. long hair, joules, white stuff ect. I was wondering what staples you would suggest purchasing in order to achieve this look and lifestyle e.g. I am looking into buying a barbour coat, once I can get to the shops (currently recovering from an illness at the moment, and part of this post is get some advice before I update my wardrobe to make myself feel a bit better) Advice on where to shop / eat and act would be great too

Any tips / advice to help me achieve this look / lifestyle would be greatly appreciated. No negative comments please.

Thanks all!

I'm getting confused. I thought we were talking middle class as in the White Stuff and Boden league. Now people are talking Prada,Mulberry and pony clubs. There is a big difference between the two, right? What are we working towards here?

Well, I live in the heart of Barbour/Hunter/dogs/guns country these days and it is nothing like my spiritual home. The last time I owned, or even needed, a Barbour was in London (and frequented Carluccio's, though not wearing the Barbour!)

I'm still a fashion victim at heart, though. On the strength of this thread I've just bought a pair of totally fake pearl earrings Silver, not gold. Chinese fake gold looks too crappy even by my nonchalant standards.

OP, do you get a chance to go shopping. I think you need to go for a mega shopping trip. I'm not suggesting you buy anything though, what I suggest is that you just start trying on loads of different clothes and see how it goes. Take lots of photos of yourself in various outfits so that you can look at yourself afterwards and decide what looks good on you and what feels comfortable. You could even buy a few items to try on at home - it's easy to return things.

I moved to a country where where the school mums were generally amazing well dressed. I consciously 'upped my game'. Not because I was trying to be something I wasn't and not because I wanted to fit in. I 'upped my game' because I felt like it and had the time and money to do it. I did it for myself.

This must be a wind-up.

If not, OP, wannabe posh girls/middle class type girls often come across as arrogant, etc. Is that what you mean with 'vibe'? That's because they think that's what's expected.

Real posh people I've met (with a lot of ££££ in the bank), however, have always been very, very nice and polite, and almost unassuming. You wouldn't guess they're rich.

OP is it Kim Sears' look you're after?

Babyliss big hair much recommended on here will make you look always blow dried - assuming you want groomed, not Old school upper middle.

Nice pair of big sun glasses. Can be worn holding hair back when inside.

Barbour gave a few outlets in outlet villages.

I always associate those high neck stripey sweatshirts that Joules do with the look you're after. I've seen similar in Sainsbury's in the past. And those slightly slouchy, tall brown boots. I think they are called "country boots". And a trilby hat with a feather in. Coloured cords and Viyella check shirts for men.

I think you need to go shopping at a country show this summer! Royal Bath and Wells is at the end of the month.

Havent read the entire thread as cant be bothered with the negative comments so sorry if I am repeating. Firstly I am sorry to hear you have been unwell, and good on you for wanting to find a look to help you feel better!

A scarf will make any outfit look more together

A white shirt with jeans and a tan leathee belt always look nice

Groomed hair and nails that are always manicured means you can get away with almost any type of clothing. Shellac etc is quite expensive but there are good at home gel nail kits. Red or coral is a nice summer colour.

Small pearl or diamond earrings. There are some good fake ones about.

Good skin, there are some lovely threads on how to achieve it.

Ironed jeans, white shirt, lambswool/cashmere jumper, argyle socks, loafers, gold/pearl/diamond studs.

OP its 'etc' not 'ect'

HTH

Wow, there have been some complete cows on this thread. Life must suck real bad for if you feel good about yourself giving a kicking to someone who has repeatedly said they haven't been well and want to do something different. I

BadgersArse how would that possibly help?

I know exactly the look you mean OP.

You need a gilet/quilted jacket and a tweed coat for winter, plus a smart blazer.

shoes - long brown and black (from Jones Bootmaker) boots, ballet pumps plus converse for casual.

Trousers - smartish jeans, chinos or cropped trousers for summer.

Blouses in pastel shades from Crew

Cardis or v neck pullovers in classic shades.

Smart workwear is Boden dresses, opaque tights and boots or heels.

I second Mantaray as being cheaper White Stuff, look at the Joules online outlet, buy Boden on eBay, Land's End for basics and Seasalt or FatFace, Jack Wills and Crew sales.

Damn, posted too soon!

OP, my casual look is the preppy look you're describing.

Something like a white shirt from Thomas Pink, or TM Lewin (who are cheaper) with cuff links, either a beige jacket, or a jumper like this Gant one with blue jeans and Russell & Bromley ballerina flats. If you're size 5 or less go to the children's department as it's £40. I would finish the look with some kind of hobo bag. This one will give you an idea. Jewelry would be diamonds (you can fake it) not pearls as that would be a total cliché.

I would have a look at the Gant website for ideas. Dh is preppy to the core so I get him and my ds plenty of stuff from there. You don't get preppier than Gant.?? good luck!

Nothing more ironic on mumsnet than someone snidely correcting English while making one themselves.

I love learning and growing, it's healthy to have aspirations and I wish you good luck!

I love the Guide to Elegance book mentioned earlier, I also enjoy the French vibe that's around in books and blogs. It isn't exactly what you asked for but encompasses chicness, elegance and a lovely sense of well put-togetherness!

There's a blog called The Vivienne Files which is lovely and focuses on clothes. The Simply Luxurious Life is fun and has podcasts too which are good. Finally I loved this book too www.amazon.co.uk/Lessons-Madame-Chic-Stylish-Secrets/dp/1451699379/ref=pd_sim_b_25?ie=UTF8&refRID=1SC8FQER2HF1ABGNY6EM

Practically, invest in a Babyliss Big Hair rotating thing and your hair will be forever styled and bouncy, stop biting your nails and use Vaseline on them to moisturise and give a natural sheen.

www.theviviennefiles.com
www.thesimplyluxuriouslife.com

I'm a little confused too as there's a difference between middle class white stuff/joules and posh. Unfortunately I don't think you can fake posh/upper class as there's often just something inherent about the way they look and carry themselves.

If you're aiming for middle class white stuff/joules then my advice would be:
Go to fat face/White stuff/joules/seasalt/boden and try on or order loads of stuff to see what suits your colouring/shape
Get some well fitting jeans. Doesn't matter where these are from but skinny or straight leg.
Bag from fatface/White stuff etc or radley. Or look round John Lewis
Converse or supergra trainers
Shop at waitrose and Aldi
Eat out at carluccios/pizza express.

Good luck and hope you feel,better soon.

Are you familiar with pinterest? Check out things like 'classic style' and 'preppy' too.

www.pinterest.com/search/pins/?rs=ac&len=2&q=classic+style&term_meta%5B%5D=classic%7Cautocomplete%7C1&term_meta%5B%5D=style%7Cautocomplete%7C1

I think the op's been really brave. She's had a rough time and wants to fit in with the other mums & work colleagues.

I'm much older than you but my suggestions would be
A really nice pair of well fitting jeans, straight leg rather than overly skinny
Some decent ballet pumps
Some long sleeved stripy tops
A navy quilted jacket/knitted blazer
A very simple watch
Tan slouchy bag
Plain sunglasses
Diamond fake's fine studs

Do be aware that lots of people won't judge you on your appearance and be more interested if you're smiley and good company.
Good luck.

OP - www.mistral-online.com are very white stuff etc.
I like the look you are going for. Doesn't always suit as I don't have the slim figure/long hair thing going on so you have to pick and choose to suit your shape rather than just wearing it whatever.

People on MN are so scathing about it being a uniform but of course there is comfort in fitting in, in knowing you are wearing the 'right' thing. I understand exactly. I hope your health continues to improve.

I agree there is a big difference between the "posh" Kate Middleton/ Kim Sears look; which to my mind is very healthy and groomed; and the middle class mum look, which is what I originally thought the op wanted- more jeans, converse, boden and a scarf; still healthy but cheaper and maybe more achievable! Could you clarify op?

(Btw I would kill for the posh girl swishy hair! But I think that is e hardest thing to get if you don't have the genes :( )

OP try Uniqlo for linen shirts and knitwear in particular. They are very good quality at lower prices than Thomas Pink etc. I often see amazingly chic BCBG foreigners buying up the shop in the classic colours, in the main London shops. They do some weird clothes too but IMHO are far better and cheaper for chic basics than Boden, Thomas Pink etc.

Massimo Dutti are worth a look too, as linked to above. They are more continental chic than UK style, so may be a bit too smart, but have some interesting accessories that will lift UK style basics.

I think Geox shoes are good quality for the prices - people have asked me if a pair I bought 2 years ago were by Hermès. You need to choose carefully, but they have some good things.

As most people have said, good hair is a must. For glossy hair, give a final brush with a Kent hair brush. The best money I have spent recently was having a blow drying masterclass at an Aveda salon - after which I have had really glossy swingy hair of which I (usually) am proud for the first time. On their advice I also bought suitable products by Aveda which are pricy but for me have been worth it. You don't need to use much - I have short hair and find a tube of conditioner lasts 2 years, and shampoo bottles last 1 year so cost per day is low.

I hope you feel a new woman soon.

Avoid things like heavy fake tan, obvious false eyelashes, bling nails.

Can I ask you a question though? Are you "posh", what dirt if jobs do you and your DP have? What's your accent? Some things you can't 'fake'. Do you have a small local community. I'm just thinking about where I live - a city. I think it would be harder to do it there.

I've been reading this thread and wondering about the negative comments. I think people have reacted badly simply because the OP has been so honest about aspiring to this look and lifestyle. Most of us shape and change our lifestyle a bit through the friends we choose and how we decide to present ourselves. People often have a different look or lifestyle at different stages of their lives, or take up new habits to try and reinvent themselves. MN is full of threads about getting fit, changing your look etc. And let's face it, modern culture seems to be largely about emulating celebrities, copying their latest fads etc. Absolutely tons of people must see (in magazines, on TV and in real life) and want to copy the look that the OP is describing. And probably want the lifestyle too. All the OP is doing is admitting it.

Enjoy your new look, OP.