How to achieve the middle class / posh girl look and lifestyle?

[stuckonchapterone]

Hello everyone.

I was seen, and read some threads similar to this, however I was wondering whether anyone could give me some advice, it would be much appreciated

I have long been a 'fan' of the posh / middle class fashion look e.g. long hair, joules, white stuff ect. I was wondering what staples you would suggest purchasing in order to achieve this look and lifestyle e.g. I am looking into buying a barbour coat, once I can get to the shops (currently recovering from an illness at the moment, and part of this post is get some advice before I update my wardrobe to make myself feel a bit better) Advice on where to shop / eat and act would be great too

Any tips / advice to help me achieve this look / lifestyle would be greatly appreciated. No negative comments please.

Thanks all!

I know people who have moved into middle class groomed look rather than posh. It is quite possible to do that and they seem to have the lifestyle that goes with it too.

Doesn't it help to have the lifestyle first? It's really difficult to maintain food nails/haircut etc on a budget. Socially too, if you don't tend to hang around with the same people it's going to be tricky. Where do you start?

Wow, that's a bit hard for me. Have some knowledge of those tribes and the 'uniform' does vary so would have to think on intersecting points.

You do realise though I'm sure that many people would regard 'yummy mummy' and 'horsey Sloane' as stereotypes to be gently mocked not patterns to be taken seriously? Better IMO to search out what works for you personally and represents the best balance between quality and value for money for your budget and fits the best with your job
and other activities. Lots of ideas above but you need to pick.

Btw restaurants mentioned above such Pizza Express Wagamama and Carluccios are fine for everyday pit stops and eg meeting up before the cinema but not in any way aspirational if that's what you want. As for Bill's, I'd say it's now downright poor nowadays. A shame.

If you really want to be mc just keep your hair swishy, wear pearl earrings when working out and other than that, be a complete fucking slob.

Oh, I like Bills

I'd say being MC/posh girl is about the people you hang out with, your attitudes and how well read you are (not how well educated. The most intelligent people I've ever met didn't go to University, they just read a lot and know a wide variety of things). Normal attitudes - compassion, kindness, empathy. Good manners too. It's these which make class, not clothes or restaurants.

Mmm , I'd have to say there are lots of people who'd probably not describe themselves as middle class who have compassion kindness and empathy. They're not prerogatives of any one class, thank goodness.

Not sure if anyone else has suggested this OP but check out a blog called 'does my bum look 40 in this?'

The blogger is older than you but I think she has the sort of style and lifestyle you are looking for.

No doubt this has been covered but middle class and posh are not the same thing.

I think DMBL40's style is a bit trendier than what OP wants but judging by the number of dinner parties she throws and her clearly massive shopping budget I'd say her lifestyle would be a nice one to aim for!

I would recommend investing in having your colours done before buying a stitch of clothing. I had mine done by house of colour and it was money well spent as I now only buy colours which suit me. Wearing the wrong colours make you look (as my camp colourist said)"like you're coming down with something darling"!

I honestly can not see an issue with what the op is trying to achieve. Many of us go through style changes in different periods of our lives. Is it the term she used?

I have been brought up with they style I think OP is after. Skiing, sailing, prosecco....not posh by any means but I guess middle class (not from UK though). When I became a mum I went through an earthy phase where I did everything organic, cloth nappies etc. All natural cleaning and beauty products. Swapped my soya lattes for herbal teas and stopped my three toned high low lighted hair.

I only lasted a few months but still, I ventured out. I don't remember why I did this but think I was inspired by some earthy types at my not class.

What I am trying to say is that is there really a need for the harsh comments? Is wanting to changer oneself even if using the oh so loaded term middle class really such a bad thing?
So the OP is willing to try some, to her, new food and drink. Is that such a bad thing to do?
Come on ladies.

Come on ladies?

Nothing wrong with trying new food or hobbies, a different style of clothes and a glass of Prosecco, obviously. But the OP sounds confused and vulnerable, and has asked how to act middle-class, and where she should shop and eat, and what kind of activities she should adopt, to be 'posh' or 'middle-class' (which, as a pp has pointed out, are not the same thing).

It's a hell of a lot more complicated than asking how to achieve a new look, and I think people's irritation and disbelief reflects their difficulty in grasping why someone would come on a style and beauty board and ask for advice in some kind of some kind of not very healthy-sounding socially-aspirational campaign, which is not based on activities, foods etc she likes but on foods, activities, dress considered as a class marker.

That raises all kinds of red flags with me in terms of self-esteem, sense of identity, and what the OP may be trying to escape from. Plus, she's not been able to define the kind of 'middle-class' she is actually aspiring to, and has a result received masses of contradictory advice, ranging from a blingy, sub-Footballers' Wives sort of lower-middle-class to the 'battered-Volvo-and heavy on the cultural capital' kind.

Very well put harpy.

Good summary harpy

Exactly, harpy

but I don't know anyone who rides.

Then you are not comfortable MC, only lower or upper working

Harpy, I think that's a good and balanced summary.

I would also add that while the OP has appeared vulnerable, many posters have tried to be helpful, a number have been quite unkind, beyond just irritated, which if the OP is vulnerable, seems somewhat unnecessary. Many have managed to stick to giving style and beauty advice without feeling the need to comment on the other aspects of the OPs questions, nor feeling the need to stick the boot in.

As someone, who is probably (and I say this tongue in cheek) posh it's been fascinating reading what I am supposed to wear. Less fascinating have been the nastiness of some posts about people perceived as posh, although I recognise some of the posters from other threads, so not necessarily surprised.

I have been occasionally confused by different responses, although it has transpired that we were all talking about different things (due to lack of clarity from the OP) - from lower middle class, mc, to upper middle class and mixing country and city styles too. I suspect if the OP is intending to take the advice, the result would be rather entertaining.

the result would be rather entertaining.

Or it might be an expensive and frustrating waste of time.

I reiterate - a leisurely reading of Henry James can arm anyone with a healthy degree of cynicism ...

I see that my attempt at a humorous way of trying to reiterate a point already made and communicate that yes, it would be expensive and frustrating to follow all the style advice given on this thread has apparently missed the mark.

Oh, interesting,zero, portrait of a lady rings a bell went to school in another country could you very briefly sum the key bit up for me?

Op, I like the style discussion on this thread. As a non-Brit this is a brilliant thread for me to learn more about some aspects British society, class and fashion! Are you from another country too, op ?

Don't mind me novice - I'm sure to type a load of annoying stuff today.

sparkles I made a fabulously, life-changingly brilliant reference to The Ambassadors many, many posts ago. Sank like a stone.

novice I understood you and thought that you made a very good point.

I really do hope the OP follows the advice from several posters here to spend some time looking at what people of her age are wearing in the places where she lives/where she will be going to work, before buying anything. I know nothing about fashion, but I do think that anyone, in any style, will feel more comfortable and confident if their clothes are appropriate to their surroundings and to the occasion.

Ideally - and this is stating the blindingly obvious, but perhaps it will help the OP - clothes should also fit well, be of the best quality that the wearer can afford (charity shops and sales if need be), and in a colour and shape that flatters the individual. I'd also hope that they'd be unfussy, and free of logos, gilt or any kind of bling. But all that is so often easier said than done!