To hell with the notion we should all aspire to look French anyway

[madforgreentea]

Ok ladies, this is part venting, part seeking views on appropriate attire for our regular summer visit to 'France to visit my French husband's family.

This thread has been sparked by an off hand comment my husband made the other day when he saw me trying on Brora's botanical skirt in bougainvillea.

I have coveted this skirt since seeing it gorgeously modelled in brora's 2014 spring summer catalogue. How do you like it? I asked him. "Very British" came the response, which, when uttered by the french, usually means frumpy, gaudy, unflattering and lacking in sartorial judgment.

I was incensed. Not because he didn't like it but because what belies this comment is a rigid dictatorial view that if you're not dressed a la francaise it must be because you don't know how and lack taste (according to my mother in law). The fact is, I am just ever so fed up of the suffocating way in which left right and centre we are told we are supposed to dress as the French, look like the French, behave like the French etc etc. I love my French husband and his family and they have lots of wonderful qualities. But I cannot for the life of me understand why adopting aloofness, feigning nonchalance and working so hard at being casual whilst looking down on others who don't meet that standard at the expense of improving one's character should be attributes to which I must aspire.

So your views please ladies. Should I return said skirt and limit the 'faute de gout' mutterings from my french family and wear the usual typical French uniform or should I don the 'frump' defiantly and subversively?

If you want to be spirited and arty and cheeky is dressing like Hyacinth Bucket really the way to achieve that?

As another one with a French DP, I salute you, OP.

French style seems to me to involve no deviation from the norm whatsoever. Woe betide you if you try and experiment

However, that skirt should probably be set on fire.

That's a link to a belt... if that's all you're planning to wear on or below the waist then it might well embarrass your MIL!

Lol at all the sympathy for op's predicament while refusing to concede there is anything redeeming about that skirt.

There is nothing subversive about mid-calf-length, I'm afraid

But you've got the right attitude. Just wear what you want!

it's a minging skirt

Its 125 quid for a polyester kids drawing....

Although I agree about not having to dress French, I'm not sure this achieves what you're hoping either?

Well, the skirt below the belt is quite fitted an'all - almost a classical shape
I think it's the best of the Brora lot tbh.

I think you should dress head-to-toe in full boho style

If you love that skirt and it makes you feel good, that's what you should wear.

Please OP, rebel all you like but choose another skirt!

I suppose the difference is, if you wear that skirt in the UK people will see you in it and think to themselves 'I don't like that' or 'I quite like that'; whereas in France you will be shunned from society and spat at in the street. Probably.

It looks OK-ish in the picture with the belt, because she's holding it up at the sides and it looks as though it's shorter and has a bit of movement to it. But in full-length it's really not so good.

God that skirt is bad.

in France you will be shunned from society and spat at in the street. Probably.

Hahaha

I agree with everything you say OP
But the skirt, the skirt is seriously awful

(Chuckling) Thanks for your comments. I agree it's devilishly frumpy. But I'm sort of attracted by really hideous stuff in a kind of 'it's sooo bad it's kind of good' way. but agree that £125 quid is rather steep for something like that. I don't particularly want to look arty or spirited. I just really love the print. I'm probably following my father more than my mother in style terms. Maybe I should just live with my fautes de gout in the uk where there'll be less collateral damage. I don't mind being spat at in the street but I don't wan my children to be disinherited after all.... Thanks for all the witty and honest views

While I defend to the hilt your right to wear whatever the hell you like OP, please find another skirt to make your point.

Most French outside of Paris La Rochelle nice etc dress in a heady mix of leclerc, h&m and etam. Tres er non chic...

I was on your side.......until I saw the skirt, sorry!
Agree though you should wear what you want.

Incidentally there are many French who dress chav style, It always makes my day to spot them.

Sorry but that skirt has no redeeming features

I don't get this whole things about the French dressing well, I saw nothing of the sort when I last visited. Woman in Paris do not dress any better than woman in London or New York. I'll give it to Parisian men though, they do dress well.

Your in-laws are just being narrow minded idiots. Wear what you like, the fact that your dress sense means so much to them, says a lot about who they are and unfortunately you find people like that in every country.
The skirt is not something I'd wear, dh might suggest he didn't like it but he would not insult my nationality and I would not insult his.

I get the feeling they are picking at something you feel quite insecure about, it's time they stopped what they should have been well mannered enough never to start. I would be quite open about how the comments have made you feel and suggest that if they have any regard for your feelings they learn to button it!

To paraphrase that known style maven Voltaire, mad, I disapprove of that skirt but I will defend to the death your right to wear it

It is indeed a difficult sartorial choice but if you like it, wear it. I find French style very dull too. And what's with the bloody scarves?? Why do they always have to have scarves at their throats to accent their bland ensemble of nautical stripes and nude ballet flats? So boring...

Can someone post some links to what French style looks like.

Last time we were in France (Languedoc region) I didn't see anyone looking stylish.

That print is really pretty, I can see the attraction. I couldn't wear it as I'm too fat curvy but I love the Brora relaxed look. On the right person, in the right place, perfect. Easy to wear on a bicycle.