Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Style and beauty

Looking for style advice? Chat all about it here. For the latest discounts on fashion and beauty, sign up for Mumsnet Moneysaver emails.

Original poster

What does mumsy look like?

499 replies

appletarts · 26/04/2013 20:16

What do you think of when you think mumsy? I'm interested in opinions and pics if anyone finds something quintessentially mumsy. It's my fear, looking all mummy.

OP posts:
noddyholder · 30/04/2013 15:46

I think mumsy is for me not looking as good as I can. Suddenly seeing myself looking frumpy becasue of what I am wearing

Rulesgirl · 30/04/2013 15:48

A lot of the time womens self esteem is wrapped up in how they look and if they are not happy with their look then it affects all areas of their life. Once they have found a look and style that suits their body shape and lifestyle then they feel "sorted" and can get on with their live feeling really good about themselves.

mathanxiety · 30/04/2013 15:50

So what's 'Dadsy' then -- if we're going to look askance at people let's do it in a way that knocks both sexes when they get to a point where they realise life isn't all about how you look/ you're worth more than the sum total of what you wear?

Rulesgirl · 30/04/2013 15:52

But what you wear and how your present yourself to the outside worlds says a lot about how you feel on the inside. It also shows that you value yourself enough to dress in a way that pleases you and makes you look good and what is wrong with that.

LadyBigtoes · 30/04/2013 15:53

"Dadsy" thread already under way - here!

ExRatty · 30/04/2013 15:55

my idea of mumsy is often very, very put together

newsreadery maybe air hostessy
capable horsey or dog walkery
avidly on trend from 2 years ago
linen wearing next warriors

not drudges/frumps at all

NotConnie · 30/04/2013 15:57

I think I'm Frumpy then! Grin
I noticed that rulesgirl mentioned that wearing more fitted clothes often makes us look a lot better, so I'll give that a try and get away from the shapeless clothes that I try to hide in currently.

woozlebear · 30/04/2013 16:05

Once they have found a look and style that suits their body shape and lifestyle then they feel "sorted" and can get on with their live feeling really good about themselves.

The problem is, I feel that what I wear suits my body shape and lifestyle. I spent many years changing my look all the time and feeling anxious about it. Now I feel sorted, as you say, but come here to find everyone else would class me as mumsy. I like very plain, simple, timeless, practical stuff. I like things that are well cut and nice fabric, and I feel that what I wear does actually flatter me in terms of cut and colour, (the unstyled hair and lack of makeup is a moot point, but that's how I feel happiest). It is probably 'dated' though, it's definitely not fashionable and probably never was, and it doesn't show flair and imagination or individuality, which also appears to be another criteria for non-mumsiness. (Although whenever I'm out people dressed like me seem to be way outnumbered, so maybe it is individual after all?)

It seems quite a narrow line that has to be followed to escape 'mumsiness' - conforming enough to meet the requirements for looking up-to-date, groomed enough in terms of hair style and make up to conform to general expectations, but also individual enough on top of that to avoid looking sheepy and like you're trying to hide. Sounds quite difficult.

Rulesgirl · 30/04/2013 16:07

NotConnie....I know that Trinny and Sussanah are not in vogue in this day and age but if you could get hold of some of their previous books on What Not To Wear they will steer you in the right direction for finding the right clothes to suit your shape and all your bumps. Worth a try. Just then adapt the shapes and styles to suit what is more currently in.

Rulesgirl · 30/04/2013 16:11

Woozle your clothes sound fine. If they suit your body shape and enhance rather than drown then you have got your look sorted in my opinion. Its not about "fashion" its about style which you can tweek here and there to keep up to date. Fashion dates very quickly and what was in last week is gone the next but style....that lasts much longer and is more enduring.

ChubbyKitty · 30/04/2013 16:15

This thread confuses me. Why do you necessarily have to change all your clothes when you become a mum? While ttc I am wearing skinny jeans, long vests to cover my flabby belly but also show off boobs and ballet pumps. I have dyed blonde hair at shoulder length with a Barbie fringe, and I wear make up everyday.

I enjoy these and I feel rather pretty. I'm also known to wear hot pants over leggings in military boots for a few quiet drinks with friends. They've quite often told me I look nice.

When I am pregnant I will only be adding bump bands and maternity jeans/trousers to this mix as I already know how comfortable everything else is going to be because, as I said, already have a round belly so things have to fit over it anyway.

And when I am a mum? I'll be wearing the exact same stuff.

Sometimes I go to work without straightening my hair or wearing make up, but as I work at dominos it's hardly likely that I'd be spurned by my colleagues for this.

So...to reiterate, why have I got to change my clothes? Seems very expensive.

instantfamily · 30/04/2013 16:18

Rulesgirl I am generally happy with my style. Some days I make more of an effort than others. Right now I am in what I think of as my mid-life crisis and have gone to hairdresser with a photo of Tilda Swinton Wink

Plathism · 30/04/2013 16:20

Chubby this is off topic but what's a Barbie fringe? I love fringes and if there's a new one indeed to try I want to know!

Plathism · 30/04/2013 16:21

*I need, not indeed!!

vitaminC · 30/04/2013 16:21

Kitty The point is not that you have to change when you become a mum, but that you don't need togive up following fashion once you have kids. "Mumsy" refers to people women who have remained stuck in a timewarp ever since they became a mother!

Your current style sounds great, in 2013, but if you're still dressing exactly the same 10 or 15 years from now, there's a good chance it will look mumsy!

ChubbyKitty · 30/04/2013 16:22

Like the new barbies have, and lady gaga in poker face.

My mum cut it for me Blush

ChubbyKitty · 30/04/2013 16:23

Ah. Fair play. I can't imagine what's going to be the fashion in 10 years time hahaConfused

Rulesgirl · 30/04/2013 16:24

You don't have to change your clothes when you become a Mum, but some ladies when they become Mums do feel that they lose their way in the sense that they would like to look a bit better and more put together. They have been soooo busy looking after babies and children that they have forgotten to look after themselves . The thread I believe was started for different people to say how they describe the word "mumsy". If you are happy with your look and are still happy with it and it still works for you and looks good ten years down the line when you have had children then that is great.

bella65 · 30/04/2013 16:25

I think the OP actually used the wrong terminology :)
I think she really meant frumpy.

I think it's easy to lose the plot clothes-wise when you have young DCs- I did. From 35- 45 were my 'wilderness years' and it was only once they were becoming teens that I found my sense of style again.

I now recoil in horror at what I used to wear in my late 30s early 40s- it was all much too 'old' for me and I now dress- i think- better than ever, in a non-mutton way in my 50s, partly due to time, money and knowing who I am.

Plathism · 30/04/2013 16:27

Just googled chubby - great fringe Grin I call it a Zooey fringe...incidentally Barbies are now £50. Wtf?

Rulesgirl · 30/04/2013 16:27

bella ...I am the same. Now in my 50s and I dress so much better and more stylish and actually look so much younger than I ever did in my thirties and early forties. When my kids turned 12 and 14 and gave myself a good talking to and sorted myself out and then went on to help other ladies.l

ChubbyKitty · 30/04/2013 16:28

I hope it does still look good but when I hit 35 I might put the girls away a bit more, I imagine they'll start to feel the force of gravity. I don't want to turn into that woman from Futurama, if you watch it, the one who's always smoking and coughing up stuff. Shock

youlooklikeaclown · 30/04/2013 16:29

Is anyone else in the foetal position crying in front of their wardrobe? I fall into the hippy-mom-chazza shop fashion and also into dog owner category as I have a Millets cagoule jack-in-a-pack thingy - strangely though I don't own a dog....but I have never, no, never worn a waterfall cardie to cover my ass

ChubbyKitty · 30/04/2013 16:30

Aw thanks plathismGrin

Also £50???

Back in my day that'd get you a dreamhouse and 5 new outfits!

Plathism · 30/04/2013 16:30

Oh wait, its only Barbies that contain video cameras that are £50. My mistake! There's something rather creepy about cameras hidden in dolls Hmm

Swipe left for the next trending thread