Hi folks
I have just got back from what should have been a great holiday with DP, SS and SD. It was an absolute nightmare. Apart from the fact that the caravan was minging (and I mean minging, not worth even a quarter of the £600 we paid for it!) the kids were absolute horrors for what seemed like an awful lot of the time! Now bad behaviour I can accept occasionally, but when they are rude, disobedient and nasty, that I cannot tolerate! If I tried to tell them off (and I didnt very often as I dont believe it is my place to) then I got called "stupid fat cow" or similar, I had middle fingers stuck up at me and got hit or punched! SS got told off by staff several times, succeeded in tearing down some curtains in the entertainment lounge (despite being told several times by DP to stop), got caught jumping up and down on an asbestos roof and had to be told to stop by staff, was noisy and rude to staff in a restaurant embarrassing me imensely, kept hitting his little sister (6) for no reason and making her cry and miserable, answering back and sulking when he didnt get his own way and being rude to me and DP etc. etc. Now I know some people will be thinking well thats kids for you, but my main grouse is with DP as although he will initially tell him to stop, he is not hard enough and lets them get away with murder. He refuses to punish the children (dont get me wrong I dont believe in belting a child, but a quick smack on the bum or the back of the legs never did me any harm)! He lets them talk to me like crap.............. for example "get me a drink......... NOW" when I ask for a please they refuse and when I say its rude to speak like that I get a "so, I dont care"! DP will stick to his guns for a while and say "if you dont say please you wont get" and eventually they give in and say please. Then 10 mins later they go to DP and say "I want.........." with no please, and he gives them what they want?????? Is it me or is that mixed messages???? They have no respect for me or other people or peoples personal possessions. When they go to their grandparents (DP's parents) they jump on their (almost brand new) furniture (with their shoes on) and DP doesnt say anything. It is left to me to tell them to take their shoes off and stop jumping around and once again I am made to look like the evil stepmum! It is so unfair. I am made to look really bad as I am the only one who is prepared to discipline them at times making DP look good and me look bad. I have bit my lip so many times, but sometimes I just have to say something when they are being out of control and rude! I am by no means strict but if I was a mum then I do believe in being firm and teaching children to respect both people and possessions! This whole affair has now caused a huge rift with me and DP as he cant see that his children are "that" bad and has escalated into me feeling very bitter towards him and the children. It has dug up old feeling and wounds regarding us not having a child of our own. The holiday for me was hard enough as it is in as much as I had to spend a week with someone elses children, on a campsite surrounded by hundreds of other children with their mummys and daddys! I can only dream of having a holiday like that with a child of my own as there never seems to be a "right time" to have one of our own at the moment. If its not because the "kids are too young", then its because "the ex would turn kids against DP", or "we cant afford a kid of our own whilst we are paying CSA for his 3", or the house isnt big enough etc etc etc. So just when is the right time? Aaaaaaaaarghhhhhh I hate this sooooo much! My back is in a corner and I feel like a caged animal. I wouldnt even mind so much not having a child of my own if his kids would treat me with some respect and kindness once in a while, but I dont even get that. The more they treat me as they do, the more I dont want anything to do with them............... nasty evil stepmum!!!
Sorry for the long rant, but I really had to get this off my chest!