Would my income have any impact on my step child?

[Sheisamum]

Hi, my husband had a child from another marriage who is currently living abroad. He intends to bring him over to the UK at some point before the child finishes school. I would love for him to get a bursary or something similar from a reputable school. My salary however is way above the limits set for this type of financial help, my husband’s salary alone would probably make him eligible for a means tested bursary or the likes. Of course, one could say our combined income is high and would disqualify us but this is not my child and I therefore have no financial responsibility towards his education. Does anyone know how step children classify in this case? Would institutions look at combined income? Or would they look at the income from the birth parent only? In all honesty, I don’t intend to contribute to this child’s education either since I will have my own to support and would not be able to afford it.

Wow

Seriously

Does your partner want him privately educated? Why do you went something for him that you won't be offering your own kids?

In answer to your question, I once worked at a private school and bursaries were based on the resident family's income so yes, yours would be, just as it would affect his eligibility for student loans if he lived with you when he goes to university

Just before the pitchforks appear I can see a incoming pending.

A) varies from school to school tbh better off ask the schools you might want to attend him in future

B) regardless of marriage you are not duty bound by any moral code to financially support DSC above and beyond the normal, (heat, food, housing) ignore posters that suggest otherwise

C) it's totally fine to spend money you earn on your DC

Also putting it out there my dc been stated educated from day 1 and just got excellent Alevel results and off to good uni so you don't need to chuck thousands at ab education

I suspect the OPs DH is considering boarding school for his DS as OP doesn't mention anything about him joining their family or, you know, actually parenting him

Not sure for school but Student Finance for University took into account my step-parent's salary.

Are you sure that a child that has only just arrived in the Uk could even be considered for these scholarships ? !

Pretty sure it’s usually done by household income for the house the student will be based at. So if he’s living with you then your income will probably be included. But obvs you need to check the T&Cs and fine print.

This a a step mum enrages me no bloody end.

The step child in me rages tbh because that little rule screwed me too.

No need to include B) and C). The OP makes it plain as day she has no financial responsibility and doesn’t want to contribute.

Why don’t you just tell DH that you’re not going to be funding his DC’s private school. Bursaries are incredibly hard to come by in any case.

My DH’s salary ( as the step parent) was taken into account so that we were over the threshold for child benefit.

Wow.

I bet all the posters saying wow would also be appalled by a step parent thinking that their opinion on the step child's education should hold any sway. A step mother posting about being concerned that the parents were making bad educational choices would be told to mind her own business.

I'm not saying wow about anything other than the complete coldness the op shows towards this child.

I might have misinterpreted your post and if I have it wrong I'm sorry.

Your SS currently doesn't live in this country but will soon. So I assume he knows hardly anyone and doesn't know the area etc. you want to send him to a private school as soon as he get here? And you want a nursery to fund it, without any financial assistance from yourself. I am assuming you want him to board.

Are you rewriting a modern take on Cinderella???!!! Poor boy, coming to live in a country he is not familiar with, going to be shipped off, no time to jobs with dad. Evil step mother!!!

Get this idea out of your head it's cruel and selfish.

It’s very difficult to get a significant value bursary from a school. So your husband would be better to consider state education if he and the kid’s mum agree that uprooting him to a new country is a good idea.

Bursary not nursery!

Is the child's name Cinderella by any chance?

No need to include B) and C). The OP makes it plain as day she has no financial responsibility and doesn’t want to contribute

I think given the most recent comments B) and C) are very much needed.

Why is everyone saying wow?! The child's mom and dad should pay and not his step mom!

So they were performative points? For other posters and not the OP who already holds that position? Gotcha.

Your partner is bringing his child to the UK? What does the mother have to say about that?

Oh no said directly to the op.

Although I'm not a betting person, it's pretty reliable that people would try and make it like all of the above unreasonable position and op is a bad person which she is not. I think the fairy tale comment summarises it nicely.

But really weird flex for any poster to say I will allow a but not b, and c. But you do you boo 🤷🏼‍♀️