DP and I are going to meet the puppy on Saturday with a view to adopt. We’ll only be gone for 20 mins tops (meeting locally) and I asked him not to tell the kids what we’re doing because
- I don’t want them coming when we first go to meet her because I want to check she gets on with our other dog and what we think of her. New puppy is a rescue dog and I’m not yet sure of her temperament.
- If we don’t think she’s the right fit I don’t want the kids to know in case they get upset and it’ll be a disappointment.
- SD12’s mum promises her a puppy every other month and she rings us all excited telling us what she’s going to name it, what breed etc but then the dog never materialises which I think is cruel. Mum knows she’s doing this as she often pipes up during the conversations and tells us herself.
I was worried if we told SD about this puppy and then it didn’t happen for whatever reason then we are essentially building her hopes up and not following through just like her mum does.
- SD will nag the life out of us about the puppy until we’re finally able to collect it and I would rather it was a surprise for all the kids.
- My DS is with his dad this weekend and I don’t think it’s fair for the other children to meet the dog until he is here too. Blended families are a minefield and we purposely waited to collect our other dog from the rescue shelter to coincide with a day SD was here so none of the kids were left out as it is such an exciting, memorable moment.
- If we do accept the dog for adoption then we wouldn’t be collecting her until Wednesday anyway as I work in the office on Mondays & Tuesdays so at least if we get her on Weds she’s got until Monday morning at home before she’s left with my mum so she’s not unsettled.
I wanted SD12 to come for dinner on Weds and have her surprised with my DCs.
BUT DP didn’t fucking listen and told SD which resulted in her royally kicking off that we’re going to see the puppy without her.
She’s being sulky, rude and outwardly hostile. I predicted this would happen and specifically and clearly asked DP not to tell any of the children, I’m particular SD12 because I knew she’d kick off about not being able to come and it’s ruined what should have been a nice surprise for all the children.
He had to go and be a bloody Disney dad and get in there first and tell her. He was sneaky and waited until he was out of the house and called her.
He’s overrode mutually decided agreements twice this week and I’m so fucking angry with him. I was right about what would result from these things both times and now he’s in a mood with me because I was right.
Why the fuck do these men behave like this??? I honestly sometimes feel like I’m the only one trying to keep the harmony and peace in this blended family. And it’s made even harder when your opinions and requests are completely disregarded!!!