Why would a mother do this ?

[SharonMitchellsBaby]

Currently on holiday with DH and his 2 children . SD is 15 and her Mum sent a message on the day before we were leaving to ask if we would do laundry that night for the daughter . WTF ? Daughter had been away at a sports camp for the week in the UK BUT not the same clothes she would need for here in hot climate .Mother claims she doesn't have drying space where she currently lives.
Why would you do this ? Why would you not encourage SD to be packed and ready to go at the beginning of the week ? When my DH queried it she said she would tell SD we couldn't do it . Why would you do that ?

baby I'm also in a similar situation , The ex is a pain in the arse - changes arrangements when it suits her but never in reverse , can't move on with her life ( despite her wanting a divorce) , all kinds of weirdness but then she's a big drinker too hence why so erratic . I dont blame you for being pissed off .

" it's the EXW pathetic attempts at trying to spoil any occasion for us with her childlike behaviour "

How does this spoil your holiday?

OP, probably half the people on here are step parents or have had step parents or will be step parents....the attitude isn't towards step parents at all, it's towards people making themselves into martyrs for no reason.
And yes your DH may well do the gardening, but are you saying you couldn't cut the grass if he broke his leg? Or wouldn't because it's 'his thing?'
My DH does the gardening too, but he can still put a washing machine on

smart when you deal with an ex who tries to annoy you in pathetic ways (like this!) you completely understand how something like this could ruin your mood before your holiday.

sometimes its just the straw that breaks the camels back!

SharonMitchellsBaby
I do the laundry , he does the garden and the cars- sorry we're not a cool couple ( not ) .

sue51 your comment shows that you don't get the fact that it is NOT the laundry itself - it is the principle behind it , it's the EXW pathetic attempts at trying to spoil any occasion for us with her childlike behaviour . I can see there are a few people here who get it but I didn't realise how much venom there was aimed at SMs on here . I see it now.

I think I get it, Sharon. Presumably your husband's ex wife has form for this sort of thing (ie, not a one off), and you don't want her to be taking advantage of you.

However I would be concerned at your step daughter being embarrassed about the laundry issue and on this occasion it would be kind to her to do the washing or get her to put it in washing machine.
As you are away now, presumably you've done it anyway.

I hope you're enjoying your holiday .

" it's the EXW pathetic attempts at trying to spoil any occasion for us with her childlike behaviour "**

Get sdd to do it at your house then? She's 15 so should know how to do this already and it was up to her to be more organised about things. My teenagers had similar this year and they didn't need prompting (one of them is super daydreamy)

Getting everything ready for a holiday is stressful and to have washing, drying, ironing and packing added to your list the day before would be annoying. My own dc annoy me before a holiday with not giving me their stuff to be packed.

We have 3 kids who all live between two houses and the rule is that whenever the clothes got dirty, that's where they get washed. I certainly wouldn't expect to do holiday washing for a holiday I wasn't on, as a PP has said she does.

wherever not whenever.

What are the thoughts on the fact that a 15 year old should be doing laundry/getting organised herself ?

Yes she should certainly be doing this herself - why has her father not taught her how to?

I would have more pride than to ask another woman to ask my daughter's clothes

To be honest I’d be quite chuffed that her mum views me as parent who is also responsible for dsd

schplot whilst undoubtedly being told "its nothing to do with you" with regards anything else.

Good enough to be a maid and more than likely financial support but nothing else is usually how it goes i find.

Why on earth shouldnt you/her dad not organise the dc for your holiday? Its not the mums responsibility to do his parenting for him.

Just posting to support you OP. The mother rings the night before you leave to say nothings ready. Bizarrely able to wash at other times. Is prepared to send her daughter off on holiday with wet clothes - what is going to actually dry in such a short space of time?

If this was truly a problem for the mother she could have asked your DH to come and collect the clothes days ago. You're not unreasonable. Just the usual stepmum bashing on here.

This is a non issue. Fine, your DH can’t manage one load of laundry for his daughter but surely she, aged 15, can?

“DSD, mum said you need to do laundry before holiday. Here’s the basket, pegs and stick it on an X cycle.”

I have teenagers and they are perfectly capable of doing this, especially during school holidays.

My DDs have been packing their own cases for holidays since they started high school.

At 15 she should be able to do this.

I would have though the clothes for camp are different to holiday clothes and she should have packed them before going to camp.

As a mother, I personally would have ensured my DD had everything she needed, as it's very clear in this situation her dad's house isn't a second home.

OP... my DH used what you said when I used to complain he didn't do enough around the house. He said he mowed the lawn/gardening... I told him it didn't need doing on a daily basis like cooking food did. I'm just suprised...as I felt it was a lame excuse from DH.