What now

[NotHereToJudge]

So I've been with a guy for 2 years and he has a daughter of 6.

I've met her a couple of times as I am very uneasy about being too much in her life. I am this way because when I'm not there they get on great and have fun but when I'm with them she hangs off her dad and doesn't let me in the room without making it very clear I'm not welcome. She stares at me, says I get in the way (when I'm only trying to get involved in the game to make it a good thing I'm there) when I stay out the way in my room she goes home and says I didn't want her there because I didn't want to play with her.

I freeze when she is around and stand away from them when they are together. I hate it.

I learnt it deal with the situation(horrible but my room became my comfort the 3/4days she is here) but now we have a son together and I refuse to make him miss out on his sons life and us both be in the room because she doesn't like us

I don't want her gone I want help to make it right with us

It doesn't help that her mother constantly is on my fb profile looking at my pics and showing his daughter (I've blocked her now) and saying I don't care because I've gone out with my friends when the daughter is over.
But if I stay in then "I'm playing mum"

Help me

And DP does try with us. He gets us involved with things together
This yes is his problem but it isn't his fault. It's mine for backing away

I just want your help to fix it that's all. Ideas to help me and her bond. I don't need to be mother or anything I just want to be her friend and her to feel like I'm not the reason her Mother and father broke up and I'm not the reason they won't get back together

I've RTWT and what sticks out to me as that you and DP aren't tackling this as a team. I have an amazing relationship with my DSD but it would never have got off the ground without my DH's unstinting support and a consistent shared approach.

You need to talk it all through together and work out what you hope to achieve, baby step by baby step. Then the pair of you tackle your DSD and her relationships with you both together.

Sounds as if the poor little girl is being harmed by her bitter DM. I faced the same problem. We responded by being the calm reliable adults my DSD could trust. We never criticized her DM. This meant the poor kid could relax. Don't share images of your life on SM if the child's DM is going to trawl them for ammunition. If you share a lovely day at the zoo, keep it to yourself. Take no notice of "playing mummy" taunts. Those are not the words of a woman with her DC's best interests at heart. If her DD is being cared for by her Ex's new DP she should be glad that you want to care for her lovingly and to build a relationship.

But to end as I began: you can't do this alone. You and DP need to be a team.