the film stepmom

[wheresthelight]

am sat watching for the first time in years and always thought it was quite funny before if a little creepy that the mum is coaching her kids to hate the stepmum but it is shit like this that makes some people think they have a god given right to attack us and portray us as evil bitches.

grrrr I used to like this film

Yep they're playing the typical stereotype again. In most cases I find the SM certainly has more of hard time with regards to a blended family rather than a SD. In most situations when a SD is introduced he's "praised" for "taking on" somebody else's children regardless if Dad is fully involved. A SM gets the polar opposite.

they even gloss over the fact that the mum kicked out the dad and the stepmum wasn't the other woman

I haven't watched it since I was in my late teens oraybe early 20's but it certainly rings some worrying bells now I am in the sm position

It certainly supports the theory that the vilification of stepmums is accepted by society.

Can you imagine the outcry if the same movie had been released in which the mum was coaching the child to hate a grandparent, aunt or cousin, purely on the basis of her personal dislike? But because it's a stepmum, it's ok.

Is life imitating art, or art imitating life?

Doesn't that film end extremely positively with the mum asking the step mum to look after her kids?

Is that not the overall message of the movie, that step mothers are NOT nasty?

I think you've really got to WANT to see a problem to see that movie negatively.

And isn't the step mother played by an extremely beautiful woman and portrayed very positively as a kind and loving person?

nicki you have as usual completely missed the point and the ONLY reason the stepmum is accepted is because the mum is dying.

and you don't have to WANT to view ot negatively considering 80% of the film portrays the mither poisoning her kids against the stepmum

"As usual you gave completely missed the point"

In your opinion obviously . I think films and other kinds of media are subjective aren't they? Not every person is going to see the same way.

I don't actually think I have missed "the point". The film acknowledges the difficulties of accepting a second marriage etc but by the end there is true affection between the two women, I think it attempted to sympathise with both sides of the issue, with both women being shown positively and both their issues being portrayed. It certainly didn't show one woman more positively than the other, if anything, the Susan Sarandon character made herself less sympathetic to me with some of her actions. I acknowledge there are issues with how negatively The SM are portrayed in literature and the media but I don't see that in this movie, unless, as I said previously, you really WANT to.

She's shown poisoning her kids and still SM stays around and picks up the pieces. How can that be anything but a positive outcome?

wheres you sound like you're torturing yourself! Give yourself a break eh?

Really? Interesting discussion I thought. But as usual met with aggression and unwillingness to communicate. If I had a different name I've no doubt it would have been a good discussion.

She's shown poisoning her kids and still SM stays around and picks up the pieces. How can that be anything but a positive outcome?

Portrayal of child abuse as a form of entertainment? Interesting pov.

All depends on how negative you want to be I suppose. It's not perfect but I think it did an better job than most of portraying what is often an extremely difficult situation as evidenced on this board.

When did Nicki say that FFS Wakey. You are determined to twist anything she says.

The movie shows both sides of a story. A story that affects a hell of a lot of people. If anything it did a good job of showing how hard life can be for a SM and also how caught up in the emotions of a new marriage a EX can get. To the point where an intelligent and normal women can encourage her children to hold a vendetta for no reason other than anger and hate.

It took a life changing event for the ex to see the error of her ways and she then had to be forgiven by the SM as she needed her (SM) to love and care for her children. The SM graciously excepted. Positive portrayal of a SM.

The moral of the story is don't shit on folk as you never know when you may need them. Life is too short to bare a grudge

Spot on Flossy. That's all I was trying to say.

I only posted because I really love movies and found it hard to see how that one could be seen so negatively. It was quite warts and all I thought, and it showed what a perfectly nice woman was subjected to just because she married someone with children.

But as usual I was met with aggression and wakeys usual manipulation of my posts to make it look like I am saying something I am not.

Not actually poisoning the kids, Wakey - just poisoning their minds.

Point taken, nicki and flossy, but the point in the OP is sound too; the portrayal and outcome of the mothers behaviour will validate, or at least minimise, it's impact on children in the mind of some perpetrators.

Like all movies, different people will relate to different characters. If you've been on the receiving end of that form of abuse from a parent, or are a stepmum whose DSC have/are, then the film doesn't accurately portray the impact it has. The "happy ever after" doesn't happen in RL situations - the child has to live with it forever.

You are correct Wakey. Happy ever afters don't always happen in life.

In regards to the OP it is shit like this that makes some people think they have a god given right to attack us and portray us as evil bitches.

People will attack not because of a movie but because of who the are fuck wits Most adults can differentiate between movies and real life so it is not fair to say that this particular movie is the cause of it especially as this movie shows the SM to be kind and considerate with a good heart.

So really the OP is not sound at all.

Not actually poisoning the kids, Wakey - just poisoning their minds.

reading, I hope I've read that wrong....are you saying that the latter isn't child abuse? Cos if so, you've illustrated my point perfectly!

Kramer Vs Kramer always makes me cry.

It's just a cheesy, hammy, (gherkiny?) big budget Julia Roberts vehicle OP.

Anyone who draws their life philosophy from those is probably best avoided anyway. Honestly. I think you are over-thinking this one

Mind you, I had an 'All the Presidents Men' poster on my wall when I was at Uni. Then I did my journalism postgrad....

Bloody hollywood

Can I sue Robert Redford? Or at least give him a good going over? A really good thorough going over

Robert Redford.

The way we were. Loved that movie before SITC bitches stole it

Oh dear. Sore point Floss?

SATC