the film stepmom

[wheresthelight]

am sat watching for the first time in years and always thought it was quite funny before if a little creepy that the mum is coaching her kids to hate the stepmum but it is shit like this that makes some people think they have a god given right to attack us and portray us as evil bitches.

grrrr I used to like this film

If Stepmom was the same genre as The a human Centipede, I'd have less concern about it!

The fact that it is a 12 is an indication that the content has been considered unsuitable for younger children, but I know if my DSS saw the movie (he's 11) he would relate to the characters and recognise the portrayal of his own mums behaviour.

never make films that may upset someone somewhere, then all it is, is unnecessary censorship.

And I never suggested it shouldn't have been made - censorship only occurs when enough people are offended.

The fact that it is a 12 is an indication that the content has been considered unsuitable for younger children, but I know if my DSS saw the movie (he's 11) he would relate to the characters and recognise the portrayal of his own mums behaviour.

And why would that be a bad thing?

And I never suggested it shouldn't have been made - censorship only occurs when enough people are offended

Sorry but that is wrong.

Censorship of films/music videos is carried out by a board. They look at many factors ranging from nudity to offensive language before deciding to ban a movie out right. This is not about enough people being offended as as the public to do not see movies until their release. I do not know anyone that has NOT been offended by the human centipede yet it was still not band.

It would validate his mums abusive behaviour in his mind, flossy. DCs who are exposed to this kind of abuse seek excuses and justifications for the way their abusers treat them - just as adult victims of abuse do.

Unless the movie clearly makes the link between "consequences" for the Mum as a result of her behaviour, then DCs who are subject to similar abuse will resign themselves to the fact that's just how "moms" behave.

As I said though, I accept that right now, there are too few people in society who are offended by the portrayal of emotional abuse as light entertainment for the movie to be censored in any way.

Censorship of films/music videos is carried out by a board. They look at many factors ranging from nudity to offensive language before deciding to ban a movie out right

Oh, I know that. But the standards against which the board judge evolve to reflect society. Movies/sing lyrics and the like which were censored years ago are permitted now.
The standards reflect social opinion.

I don't agree.

I think the part where the little boy says "if you want me to hate her, I will" says it all, as it stops Susan Sarandon dead in her tracks and, I think, makes her ashamed of herself.

The movie is very clear Wakey. It shows the mum being unnecessarily cruel to the SM who is doing nothing wrong and only wants to be friends with the children. In fact to a child it shows the consequences of her actions to be death by cancer.

Also emotional abuse of any form of child abuse in films is rarely shown as entertainment. Movies that address this are usually addressing the taboo of the subject and not doing it for the shits and giggles. I found Angela's Ashes quite disturbing in parts and amusing in others. As we know the subject matter of Stepmom does happen in some families and the movie portrays this behavior to be wrong on all counts.

In fact to a child it shows the consequences of her actions to be death by cancer.

Karma, maybe?

I don't think so. I think it was more about showing that a women who hated another for no good reason had to put her feelings aside for the sake of her children. It took a life changing event for her to realize that. Moral of the story life is too short to bare a grudge, live and let live.

We'll have to agree to disagree - if that is the moral of the story, then portraying the mom as emotionally abusing her kids by poisoning their minds because she "bears a grudge" seems an extreme, and rather distasteful, way of making the point to me.

I think the part where the little boy says "if you want me to hate her, I will" says it all, as it stops Susan Sarandon dead in her tracks and, I think, makes her ashamed of herself.

YY Yank

if that is the moral of the story, then portraying the mom as emotionally abusing her kids by poisoning their minds because she "bears a grudge" seems an extreme, and rather distasteful, way of making the point to me.

But as you regularly point out this happens in many many families and SM are hated by the exes so not that extreme. I think it was done very tastefully as they made it difficult to hate either character and as a viewer you were able to identify with both women's emotional distress at some point.

if that is the moral of the story, then portraying the mom as emotionally abusing her kids by poisoning their minds because she "bears a grudge" seems an extreme, and rather distasteful, way of making the point to me.

It's a maudlin weepie, designed to manipulate the viewers emotions in the same way as thousands of other films that are based on family drama of some kind. It isn't supposed to be a 'how to' guide for blended families.

With regards to the mother dying of cancer.

"karma maybe?"

What do you mean Wakey?

What do you mean Wakey?

flossy suggested that a child may view the death of the mom from cancer to be a consequence of her actions.

That's the principle behind karma - that the intended actions of an individual influence their future.

Has anyone seen a movie called, I think, My sisters keeper?

I haven't watched it yet. Is it as emotional as I imagine?

To be fair she was a pretty shit step mum. She forgets it's purple shirt day, buys the kids a puppy on a whim and forgets to lock the door when she's shagging the dad in the shower

Yes, that what I thought you meant. Are you saying that YOU think karma is a suitable way to describe the death of a mother after that kind of behaviour or are you indicating that is what Flossy meant?

@ Hans

Yes, that what I thought you meant. Are you saying that YOU think karma is a suitable way to describe the death of a mother after that kind of behaviour or are you indicating that is what Flossy meant?

No, I'm very clear in my own mind that the mom was portrayed abusive. Her death from cancer is unrelated and an additional twist to the storyline.

Has anyone seen a movie called, I think, My sisters keeper?

I haven't watched it yet. Is it as emotional as I imagine?

Yes I saw it. It is a bit of a tearjerker but it is also a legal drama and focuses on the ethical dilemma too.

I just wanted to clarify your meaning. With your form for twisting people's posts to suit your own agenda it's always best to ensure there's no misunderstanding.

I didn't like My Sister's Keeper, I thought Cameron Diaz was woefully miscast and really unlikable. It left me cold and I usually cry at everything!