the film stepmom

[wheresthelight]

am sat watching for the first time in years and always thought it was quite funny before if a little creepy that the mum is coaching her kids to hate the stepmum but it is shit like this that makes some people think they have a god given right to attack us and portray us as evil bitches.

grrrr I used to like this film

Some folk just don't appreciate the efforts you make Arse

Wakey, I think most 11yo watching step mum would think "this is rubbish can't we watch the lego movie". Highly unlikely he'd think "that's like my mum so it must be ok". But I get the feeling you just want something to flog tbh

Wakey, I think most 11yo watching step mum would think "this is rubbish can't we watch the lego movie". Highly unlikely he'd think "that's like my mum so it must be ok". But I get the feeling you just want something to flog tbh

Well, it's possible, but unless you know my DSS personally, I think it's reasonable to assume I know him better than you do. Abuse victims often actively seek out validation of their abusers - as other threads on MN evidence only too graphically.

I hope you're right, though.

My Sister's Keeper, meh.

I don't like Cameron Diaz much but liked the Other Woman okay and In Her Shoes is pretty good.

The underwear, singing about big dicks, movie is called the Sweetest Thing. It is ridiculous but my friends and I liked it when we were younger.

So should films never show negative behaviours then, just in case someone seeks validation from it? That's Quentin Tarantino out of a job.

BUt surely the main Cameron Diaz film is "Something about Mary" - I thought she was pretty funny in that.

I connected with that film Thumb since I too once had an unfortunate incident with spunk/hair

So should films never show negative behaviours then, just in case someone seeks validation from it? That's Quentin Tarantino out of a job.

Was that in response to my post? If so, I think it's about context - a dark psychological drama about child abuse may be appropriate (art imitating life and all that) but portraying abuse in a lighthearted family comedy, probably not.
It's all down to how the audience perceives the behaviour being portrayed. I'm sure most people who have watched "Stepmom" don't give a second thought to the moms behaviour -whereas if she was violent towards her DCs, slapping/hitting them, for instance, it would create a very different reaction.
My point isn't about the movie so much as about society - "just poisoning DCs minds" isn't immediately considered abuse unless you have first hand experience.

Oh Flossy! Really?! Excellent, do tell more!

I didn't find Step Moms lighthearted it all. I found is sad and upsetting.

There will be some who watched that film and could see no harm in the moms behavior just as there will be some who thought Jodie Foster was asking for it in The Accused for example. Any movie is open to the person's watching it interpretation. I would think the majority of watchers would see how wrong moms actions were.

I agree with Today the horse your flogging is dead and buried.

I will take it to that hatters thread as I do not wish to derail this one with my story of spunk hair Thumb

Stepmom isn't a lighthearted comedy though, it's a family based drama showing the sometimes difficult relationships within a blended family. Mum struggling to accept the new woman in her DC's lives and behavng badly, stepmum trying to befriend the children and sometimes messing up and the children having divided loyalties. I can't quite remember what the Dad did!

All films are open to interpretation. Take something like Kramer versus Kramer. I remember watching it as a child and thinking Meryl Streep's character was the 'baddie'. Watching it as an adult I felt sorry for her as a woman who did all the drudge work whilst her husband was a workaholic and she basically had a breakdown.

And besides, Susan Sarandon's character wasn't portrayed sympathetically, she saw the error of her ways and then died. What more should have happened to her?

Stepmom isn't a lighthearted comedy though

IMDb lists it's genres as "comedy" & "drama". The parental advisory guidance makes no mention of emotional child abuse.
Interestingly, the death of "mom" isn't identified as an intense aspect of the plot line in the advisory - although the sound of her vomiting due to her cancer is.

I'm not convinced the death of the mom was intended to be linked to the abuse she inflicted, though.

Interestingly, the death of "mom" isn't identified as an intense aspect of the plot line in the advisory

That is interesting because for me it is the aspect of the film that I was most affected by, due to my own history of having a Mum who knew she was dying and leaving behind 3 children. So I do think people interpret films based on their own views and experiences.

Comedy & Drama Wakey So it is not billed as light hearted.

Had they mentioned the death of the mom in the advisory then it would have given away the ending

Nobody said her death was linked to the abuse??

Or is that something you think?

I'm not convinced the death of the mom was intended to be linked to the abuse she inflicted, though.

No one has said that. I just meant I'm not sure what else the character could have done given that she saw the error of her ways did her best to include the stepmum in her children's lives before dying so I'm not sure what more those who are criticising the film about wanted from her character.

If she had been lovely and welcoming to the stepmum from the start and did everything to put her DCs first you would probably be complaining that it was an inaccurate portrayal because your own DSC's mother doesn't do that.

"I'm not convinced the death of the Mom was intended to be linked to the abuse she inflicted though."

Where has anyone tried to make that link?

Nobody said her death was linked to the abuse?? Or is that something you think?

Goodness, there's an echo in here - didn't nicki ask me that up thread?

No, I do to think the death is linked to the abuse.

I don't think it is Karma, either.

It has been mentioned by yourself and basgetti as a mitigating factor in the choice of the producers to portray a woman abusing her DCs -

"the character was not portrayed sympathetically, she saw the error of her ways and then died"

And

"In fact to a child it shows the consequences of her actions to be death by cancer."

Just to be clear, I don't think the two are linked, either in the plot line or as mitigation for the portrayal of abuse in a movie designed to be a comedy.

Yes I asked the question again because you brought it up again indicating that others were trying to make that link, disingenuous as ever

If she had been lovely and welcoming to the stepmum from the start and did everything to put her DCs first you would probably be complaining that it was an inaccurate portrayal because your own DSC's mother doesn't do that.

Um, just like my own DDs stepmum, you mean?

I'm not complaining, I'm joining in a discussion on a discussion forum, expressing my pov, which is that I am uncomfortable with the portrayal of child abuse in a movie that someone else started a thread about.

I was quite happy to agree to disagree, and the conversation had moved on, then I was invited back into the discussion this afternoon by todayisnottheday.

Clearly my mere existence irritates some people, especially if I express my own opinions, but hey, I'm not going anywhere!

I didn't say it was a mitigating factor, I just wondered what more was wanted from the character, and what would have satisfied you. It took her diagnosis for her to clearly see the reality of her damaging attitude. Real humans were being portrayed, not robots. It is Hollywood, not the video of Cafcass' guide for separated parents.

At least no one swears at you, calls you a troll and/or orders you off the thread wakey. Looks like the SP board has made a real change for the better recently