Oh for goodness' sake. School uniform

[InFlagranteDelicto]

We have 50:50. Dss wants to keep the routine the same, wed- fri one week, wed- Mon second week, despite the change of school. This is the first time he's come to us straight from his secondary school, and is really chuffed with the journey.

However.... School Uniform. Every other year I've sorted it all, so he has 5 sets 2 at each house, and one set floating so he has a change of uniform for each day. This year, because it's shiny new secondary uniform his mum has sorted all the uniform. She's spent a fortune, and took the account overdrawn (Old joint account, only has dss' CB paid into it to cover his expenses, ie clubs, uniform). I have no uniform for him to wear tomorrow. Apparently he only has a couple of pairs of trousers, a couple of shirts, one stank top and one blazer. What chuffing good is that? Dss is a sweaty child, there's no way he can wear the stuff he arrived in today for the next two days. Dp has texted her- so hopefully we will get something, but I am cross. This is not fair for Dss.

right, is it that there's more stuff in secondary? Because I remember my school I needed a full school uniform, a gym PE kit, and outdoors kit, trainers for indoors (white soles), trainers for outdoors (black), hockey boots, 3 different types of sports socks, shin guards etc.

Could it be she's bought "a lot" because even just buying 2 sets of non-logoed stuff, it's a long list?

Plus just because they keep the amount of logoed stuff to a minimum, doesnt mean the official outfitters won't sell the other stuff (the plain trousers, shirts etc), at about 10X the price of buying the same thing in the supermarket. Even just going to say John Lewis rather than Sainsburys/tescos would be a lot more expensive.

Really, if you had him over the summer, you should have raised the lack of uniform at the last visit before this if she was 'sorting it' - if she'd not bought it at that stage, you at least could get it.

Too late now to get in to a 'he said, she said' about it. It sounds like you've just made decisions in the past about what he needed and handed her the finished decision, fine, but she's done the same to you and made different choices. Ask how she sees this working for the next 6-12 months until he needs the next set if there's not going to be sets kept at each house but him going backwards and forwards himself with the clothes.

It depends on the secondary school.

My local comp is quite cheap but the secondary my dd1 went to was very expensive - over £200! I'm not kidding.

Tbh I don't see what the fuss is.

Maybe she spent the money on a new hair do or fancy nails??

Christ you lot are mean!!!

You are coming across a bit 'perfect parent' OP and of none of us are that.

All my dsc are now grown up and in charge of themselves thank goodness but I do remember these frustrations if I think hard enough!

In the longer term all this is meaningless and most of it you will forget. My advice re the uniform would be to do what will make life easier for you and your dss and try to let go of the bad feeling. In the bigger picture this really isn't that important

Maybe you don't "see what the fuss is", maybe the op has done the uniform buying every year with consideration for the ex and is just ranting because the ex hasn't don't the same for her? Could that be it? I wouldn't sent my son to his dads knowing he didn't have clean clothes!

And what's with the "been at the wine" comment! How bloody rude!

so can't afford the required amount?

what exactly is 'the required amount' of school uniform?!

Is it possible that DSS was supposed to bring his spare shirt and trousers himself and forgot?

Do you think maybe she's bought it all but just not got round to getting some of it to yours yet? Or expects your DP to collect his share from hers? I wouldn't rush to buy more until you've found out what she means by having "sorted it"

For tonight, wash the shirt, dry overnight and just wipe down trousers, etc as needed. Lack of communication yes, and not your fault at all, though possibly your DP as much as his ex failing to get the uniform he needs to his house. DSS's hardly going to carry it all with him is he?

Seriously unkind posters on here. Op, I think I understand. It's what TheMumsRush said, isn't it?

Very, very irritating to have only one set of uniform for 3 days at school. Unless you happen to run a 24/7 laundry service... Lack of communication and consideration.

Sorry just re read my comment and yes it does come across as rude, i didn't mean it to .. apologies op, it sounded right when i was typing it with the previous comments of you not making sense in mind.

Secondary school stuff, while unlogo'd, can still be expensive due to the shirts being colours other than white etc, for instance, DS' are grey shirts for boys and lilac for girls, so they're not cheap, SS and SD only have one set of uniform each, it has (had) to be washed and dried every day for SS as he was 'sweaty' - its a teen thing sometimes and his personal hygiene was a bit lax .. I think you're going to have to bit the bullet and get a spare set, i'd maybe ask exactly what she brought and how much it came to, "so you know how much a spare set will be" and then you'll know why he only has the one set.

It can be expensive with the different shirt for each sport etc and she may have been caught unawares after years of buying the cheaper primary school uniform

There are seriously more things in this world to get het up over.

True but coming on mn to rant still helps :)
Minor things can still be annoying as part of the bigger picture :)

I wouldn't have worn supermarket clothes at secondary school, neither would any of my friends. Maybe ss objected and she had to go elsewhere which is why it was more expensive? (I'm now no longer a bratty teen and would happily wear supermarket clothes now!)

You know most children, even at primary level don't have 5 complete changes of uniform? 3 maybe. I can understand being in a bit of a strop that you dont have so much as a spare pair of trousers or a clean shirt, but if you didnt already have them in hand before today, did you think he was bringing them along to school and out to yours in his bookbag ?

Bookbag

Am I the only one that finds it a bit odd that you know the CB account is overdrawn?
Hell would freeze over before I'd share an account with my ex!

Is there any chance she only meant she'd sort out her 2 sets?

Sympathy though - not what you need, a panic! Send his dad down to the supermarket?

Going up a year in the same school is cheap uniform wise.

Going to a different school is expensive. We got two shirts, two skirts, two jumpers, one pair of shoes, PE kit, lunch bag, bag, pencil case stuff (calculator, compass etc), socks and it was a fortune!! Almost 160