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What are your non-negotiables for your child’s phone use? Win The Other Phone worth £279!

85 replies

LibbyMumsnet · 04/11/2025 09:42

As you may have seen by now, we have launched The Other Phone, a safety-first smartphone for children, created with Mumsnet users and built with Nothing and SafetyMode.

First phones can be brilliant for independence but access to the internet on a personal device brings its own safety concerns.

That’s why we have designed a phone that brings you peace of mind: tailored safety settings that suit your family, with the design and performance of a modern smartphone that your DCs will actually want to use.

With a first phone comes new boundaries to set and everyone has a slightly different approach. We’d want to hear what has worked for your family:

What are your house rules for phones and your DC, and which have genuinely stuck?
Have any softened as your child has grown?

Share your thoughts below for a chance to win The Other Phone worth £279. One lucky winner will be chosen at random. Enter by 30 November. (T&C's)

OP posts:

MNHQ

BeckyAMumsnet · 02/12/2025 11:39

Hoolahoophop · 11/11/2025 13:28

Just starting to think about it as we would like our child to have a phone for the transition to secondary, more freedom, and walking to and from school alone. In all honesty, we would like a nationwide ban on smart phones in school forcing all Children down the brick phone rout. We would choose a brick phone, but the social pressure for a smart phone is huge. It has to be all. The evidence is huge that smart phones are bad for kids. Just ban them.

Hey @Hoolahoophop you're not alone on wishing for brick phones only. If the school brought in a firm rule, would that take the pressure off enough for you to go basic for the first year, then review once the friendship groups settle?

benjaminjamesandgraham · 02/12/2025 11:39

benjaminjamesandgraham · 02/12/2025 11:36

I really need help on how to do this - how to restrict chats, and settings to they cannot be added to any inappropriate chats - I want them to enjoy social media with their close friends - but be safe. Peer pressure about being part of a group is something they need to deal with .

Show quote history

The phone to win has parental controls - So I would have more control over their useage.

MNHQ

LibbyMumsnet · 02/12/2025 13:20

Thanks so much to everyone who joined the discussion and shared your thoughts!

Huge congratulations to @lovemyflipflops, who has won the prize draw and will be receiving The Other Phone. 🎉

If you’re interested in getting one yourself, you can find it here.

OP posts:

lovemyflipflops · 02/12/2025 13:26

LibbyMumsnet · 02/12/2025 13:20

Thanks so much to everyone who joined the discussion and shared your thoughts!

Huge congratulations to @lovemyflipflops, who has won the prize draw and will be receiving The Other Phone. 🎉

If you’re interested in getting one yourself, you can find it here.

Thank you SO much - my DC would be so happy with this !!

MNHQ

BeckyAMumsnet · 03/12/2025 12:23

Fancyquickthinker · 11/11/2025 15:12

They will get one when they go to secondary school, as it will be a long way away, and for emergencies. They will have certain rules - no phones at the table, no phones in the bedroom, and certain apps will be out of bounds.
The penalty would be giving them by old samsung basic phone - so they can ring but no smart capabilities until they can show they can be responsible.

Love the natural consequence of swapping to the basic phone. That feels fair. Do you think you will write the rules down together before term starts so there is no confusion when you need to enforce them?

MNHQ

BeckyAMumsnet · 03/12/2025 12:23

SE13Mummy · 11/11/2025 17:47

When DCs were first given phones, I locked them down so there was no internet access at all, only saved contacts could call/message them and downloads had to be approved. As they've got older and demonstrated they could be discerning about what to engage with/not, they have had freer reign e.g. Snapchat wasn't allowed until closer to 15 because of the disappearing posts but they had Instagram sooner than that, along with chats about algorithms and how clicking on #whatever may send them down a rabbit hole they'd rather not explore.

One of the main rules was no access overnight. Even aged 16 and doing GCSEs, phones were off and out of the bedrooms mainly so they had a bit of headspace. For DC1 in particular that was useful (albeit not appreciated at the time) and they simply told friends they switched off their phone to sleep/work at 9pm. I wish I'd not relaxed that rule post GCSE because being available all night is something that has put pressure on DC1 and they're out of the habit of switching off their phone at night. DC2 won't be having that rule relaxed after GCSEs! The rule DC1 hated most was no phones in rooms from midnight if there was a sleepover. Everyone's phones went on the landing to charge. It meant they could access their phone if they needed to (it was less than 1m from DC1's door to the plug) but that they could all sleep without the risk of someone thinking it would be funny to secretly film them or similar. I know they could have got their phones to do it if they'd really wanted to but they never did. I felt strongly that when people are asleep, they are vulnerable and so need to be able to trust the others they are sharing a room with. Having a bunch of phones present and in use just felt risky. None of DC1's friends minded the rule (and yes, their parents were aware of it in advance).

Youngest DC is a teen and has screentime limits on but we're flexible about them and they are changed during holidays etc.

This is such a thoughtful progression. Interesting about not relaxing the overnight rule after GCSEs. If you could rewind, would you keep phones out of bedrooms right through sixth form for both DCs?

MNHQ

BeckyAMumsnet · 03/12/2025 12:25

Theimpossiblegirl · 11/11/2025 21:23

We live in a rural area and children get the bus from age 9 (year 5) so that's the age a lot of them get their first phones, my two dds included.

The school is very strict on phone use at school but it's good to know they are contactable when the buses go wrong.

My main rule is phones stay in the kitchen at night for charging. Fire safety but also I know they can't be on them.

Same here on buses going wrong. Do your two mind the kitchen rule or has it just become part of the bedtime routine now?

MNHQ

BeckyAMumsnet · 03/12/2025 12:26

Minimalist UI just means a very simple, uncluttered screen with fewer icons and options - less to tap by accident. You can get pretty close on an iPhone with Screen Time, app limits and a tidy home screen. Is there anything you feel you cannot lock down?

Theimpossiblegirl · 03/12/2025 16:34

BeckyAMumsnet · 03/12/2025 12:25

Same here on buses going wrong. Do your two mind the kitchen rule or has it just become part of the bedtime routine now?

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They accept the rule about leaving phones in the kitchen as I do it too. Modelling healthy screen behaviour is vital.

Fancyquickthinker · 05/12/2025 07:41

BeckyAMumsnet · 03/12/2025 12:23

Show quote history

No I would not write this down - I have an old samsung in my desk - and IF they loose, damage, or use the phone for something they know I would not approve - they will be given this- I think the threat of this and the embarrassment in front of their friends would really be an incentive to use and look after their phone appropriately.

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