How do you parent the internet? Share your tips for a chance to win a £200 voucher

[BellaMumsnet]

Created for NetHabit

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Are you worried about your children’s use of the internet, or how much independence to give them? Do you feel equipped to keep them safe on social media? However you manage your children's time and safety on the internet, share your thoughts below.

How to take part:

· Post your tips on the thread below to be entered into a prize draw
· One lucky MNer will win a £200 voucher for a store of their choice

Here’s what NetHabit has to say:

“We created the NetHabit app to simplify the support and guidance parents need to improve their children’s safety online. Finding a balance between enabling the benefits of the online world and keeping children safe can be tough. From securing device settings, to opening up a dialogue and keeping informed of new threats, we create a tailored list of to-do’s to help make the world of online safety simple for your family.”

Thanks and good luck with the prize draw!

MNHQ

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We use timers on tablets to limit screen time. Luckily our school are supportive of online safety, had lots of good videos and info from them- it's a minefield with the eldest. He's already aware about not sharing info (and that people might it be who they seem online), ensuring chats are off on online games and he's only allowed to be online downstairs with us.

We have regular chats with the kids about privacy and the importance of keeping location private, sharing photos and information with a small group of people not all their friends. Practising the privacy settings on their social platforms, the block and report functions so they are comfortable with it! . Encourage them to report anything to us that worry them.

My main concern is about inadvertent access to the internet. Sometimes DD5 plays with my phone, taking photos or playing in the CBeebies app. I have to keep a close eye because if she presses something by accident she could access the internet. It would be nice if we could lock the phone to use that app only until you put in the passcode.

We've had a lot of support from school with online safety - in primary school here they do assemblies and show video clips and talk about different scenarios with the children eg. if someone new starts talking to them online, or if they see something upsetting. At home we have screen time downstairs so it can be monitored, and we talk about what she's been on and get involved together so she knows she can come to me with any worries

Although they do use our devices occasionally, at the moment their main device is kindle fire for kids, so we know they can’t access anything inappropriate through it.

As yet the children do not have unsupervised access to the internet. This will change when the eldest goes to High School this year and will need to have a smart phone. I'm planning on installing google home on it to have some oversight/control over what he can do. Also, trying to teach some common sense about online safety and appropriate behaviour. Scares the shit out of me to be honest.

Doing a online safety course was the easiest way to get the kids to understand the risks of being too trusting on the internet.
If your kids are younger, use a Xbox and regularly go online using it, download the Xbox app to your phone and connect it to their console, that way you can monitor who is talking to your child when they are playing their games.
If your kids are older and into making videos for their social media, make sure they are aware to not film in school uniform, or in front of their homes, and to never say their full names. Also, check what videos they are uploading and go through the comments to make sure they aren't being bullied.
And if your kids are old enough, watching the Breck Bednar documentary really drives the message home

As children become older teenagers you have to keep talking to them and realise they are likely to have lots of technical knowledge that you don't. I let/encourage my son to tell me about internet safety - he knows a lot from school, he likes to feel that he's giving me advice and actually I'm hugely reassured by what he says. If I were to start a conversation along the lines of " not everyone is who they say they are online" he'd do a massive eye roll but if he's telling me about internet safety he's much more interested\engaged

I have various parental settings enabled, and DD knows I can check her phone at any point (she's 12 so I'm not sure how much longer that will last). We talk too - but I do feel out of my depth and like I am just winging it!!

We have a rule of no internet without an adult in the same room. We also have a rule of no videos programs on laptops /tablets with out adults around. Hopefully this way we will spot anything they shouldn't be seeing.

I heavily supervise my 5 year old son's internet use. The restricted modes are a waste of time on YouTube and Tiktok. I allow him to look at certain channels on TikTok with me on my phone but I would never let him have it on his own to go into anything else. When I look at TikTok myself there's some very disturbing posts and lives on the restricted setting.

I found Alexa played inappropriate songs so we don't use it. YouTube settings need to be changed on each device which was a surprise to me. He gets cranky when we look at too much online so we watch videos and play online games for half an hour after dinner each day.

Setting filters on my modem admin settings to the tablet used by my DS, and supervision and screen times set for weekend and weekdays.

I don't feel educated enough to have full satisfaction over my child's internet use, especially when they want a facebook or instagram account, and how to set up and monitor and prevent unwanted messages and contact, I wish my DD did not keep asking for facebook - 'because everyone else does' I'd love to be in control over who would be able to see her account if I allowed one - the thought of online bullying and grooming fills me with dread. The internet is amazing for streaming - but not social media.

You can use many apps like Kidslox to control you're childs usage, which require you to download the app on your phone and their device, so you can remotely control their device, including turning it off. Some apps can let you see what they're messaging, and track where your child is if they're carrying a phone. These can cost money so the best solution I have found is the app that comes with your broadband router, so if you're with Vodafone you can use Vodafone Broadband app, each provider will have their own app. From here you can make a schedule for when the router is on and when it goes off. Once it's off you cannot connect to the Internet until its scheduled to come back on, unless you reset it with the reset button on the router, so best to not let the kids know how to reset the router, this will put it back to default settings.You can also block individual devices in the app, so if you want the broadband on for yourself or older kids but want your younger child off the Internet at bedtime for instance, you can block just their device. You can also set up a guest connection for the router say for one childs device that gives you more control over that device, including time limits for when the guest connection is on. As long as they don't know the password to the main connection they are only able to use the guest connection (via password) which you can control easier. You can just turn the guest one off when their time is up leaving the main connection on. You can also change the router password within the app to stop a child connecting altogether. If you cannot download the app for your router you can also make sure your router is on, then type in your phone or tablets Web browser address bar 192.168.1.254 which is your routers IP address (there are other IP addresses ) and login with your default password (admin) and you can gain access to all these controls for your router like schedules etc. All these tips I have learned from many battles over the Internet over many years 😉

My child is preschool aged, so it hasn't become too much of an issue yet. For me, putting a parental filter on the internet so she can't stumble across pornography when she gets bigger, is good for peace of mind. Until she's old enough to understand internet safety, all her little toddler games are loaded on to an old laptop that doesn't connect to the internet

We have parental settings on devices, he knows to tell us if anyone on his online gaming asks to meet up in person and never to give out any personal details and we make sure he knows the reasons why, without scaring him about it.

It seems super complicated to set appropriately restrictive settings on all the various apps and devices we have. My children are still very young so don’t watch stuff/access the internet without us. It’s a minefield!

I’ve done all the filters but I still worry, so I try to be open about the internet and encourage conversation so that they feel like my Dc can discuss with me anything they see or interact with while on the internet just like they talk to me about their day at school.

I set time limits and have parental settings and blocks on yet I am still worried about what comes up especially on apps such as TIKTOK and youtube. I can have all the settings and parental blocks on yet i still see and hear innapropriate content that comes up when I monitor him which is a worry

I use a parental control app so that I can limit their time and see what websites they are using. I also have conversations with my child about the risks. Trust is pretty key so I have to hope they are being sensible.

The biggest heartbreak of my life reached out to me and I went numb - I accepted his friends request and responded to his messages 🤡 but I felt like I’m gonna throw up and my hands were shaking 🤧

Not sure if I did the right thing but I want him to see how well I am doing without him- is that wrong 😑

I find this a real minefield, trying to navigate the balance between trusting DC to use the internet appropriately but also making sure their usage is safe and moderated

So sorry though I have created a new thread - not relevant to the discussion

Be honest with them and show trust - and lead by example! Banning phones and then using yours all the time is not the way to go.
And make their time not on the internet more entertaining than being on their phone/the computer - then they won't miss it!

School have done a lot around Internet safety and sometimes it feels like the DC know more about it than I do!
At the moment we limit their screen time and are quite strict about what they can and can't do.
They generally just play games on their devices but we've had the occasional pop up / ads which we just tell them to ignore / 'press the X' / come out of.
I'm dreading when they're on social media I must say.