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MNHQ

Find out how Mumsnetters got help from their parents to get on the property ladder

457 replies

LucyBMumsnet · 17/12/2019 09:52

This sponsored discussion is now closed

Getting on the property ladder can be an uphill battle for first-time buyers - from the financial challenges to the legal paperwork it throws at home seekers, many rely on help from parents to make it happen. That’s why we want to find out if you’re considering or currently purchasing or have already purchased your first home and how you went about it.

So we are asking you what help you received or are receiving from your parents, if at all, and roughly, when this was? Who started the conversation, you or your parents? Did you tap into the Bank of Mum and Dad and how did you do that - through their savings, using their existing assets or property, them getting a loan, accessing their pensions or another way? Was it in the form of gift, loan or early inheritance? Did you seek legal advice and formalise the process with your parents? If so, how easy was it to sort out the legal side?

If you could, how would you change the process of receiving your parents’ financial support when buying your first home? If you’re considering saving for your own children’s futures - perhaps so they can buy a home - what’s important to you?

Whether you have considered, currently getting on the property ladder or already have your first dream home, post your thoughts on the topic on the thread below. All MN users who leave their opinion will be entered into a prize draw where 1 lucky winner will get a £150 voucher for a store of their choice (from a list).

Thanks and good luck,
MNHQ

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Find out how Mumsnetters got help from their parents to get on the property ladder
OP posts:
pushchairprincess · 31/12/2019 10:56

My dad bought me a plot of land for my 21st birthday, and when I was 25 I had enough savings to build my own detached house, which I helped design, my dad paid for solar panels, my energy bills are really low. I love my home and have had my family there. I have opened a help to buy ISA for DD1 and DS1 and eventually this will get them on the property ladder eventually.

lovemyflipflops · 31/12/2019 11:00

I bought a little flat in 2002 for £40, and when my parents retired, we did a swap - they downsized to my flat, and I moved back into the family home, which is amazing for them to do this - but it suits us both, they have the space they need, and i have a family home. As the flat will be left to me in their will, I will let this out or give it to my children when they are old enough - perhaps I will move back there one day, and both properties will remain with the family.

ohdannyboy · 31/12/2019 11:06

My parents took early retirement, and bought a home in Portugal in 2010, they let me rent their home for several years giving me time to save for my own home, they eventually let me buy the home for £45 k - its worth £200K - so I am really happy, and there is a converted garage in the garden which I have converted into a living accommodation, so they can stay, and I rent it out to students for the rest of the year. The income I receive means I don't need to work and can be a SAHM which I love.

lillypopdaisyduke · 31/12/2019 11:11

No financial help, but guidance, help with the house renovations (rewiring, getting the garden from a wilderness to a haven, and plumbing in a new bathroom and wet room). I lived rent free and was encouraged to save via an ISA to buy my first home. I was able to put 50% deposit down when I moved in with my OH, and when I went part time after DS1 and 2 the mortgage payments were low enough for us to afford comfortably. I have opened a help to buy ISA for DS1 and 2 and pay in every birthday for them.

Strugglingtodomybest · 31/12/2019 11:13

I asked my parents if they could lend me £5000 for the deposit on my first house. They did, and I paid them back when I sold it 5 years later. I don't know where they got the money from, asking that would have been a step too far!

chris8888 · 31/12/2019 13:46

No parents couldnt they didnt have the spare money, or the means to get it. We saved, bought a council house in a rundown area. Moved up the ladder, divorced and fell off the ladder completely. Life!

dwerry · 31/12/2019 18:51

They couldn't afford to help me when I initially purchased a property but over the years, as they've become better off, they've helped me with my mortgage.

badamsgirl · 01/01/2020 11:35

We were very fortunate that my parents were in a position to help us out with our deposit as it made us alot more able to get the property that we wanted at the time with a larger deposit to put down.

foxessocks · 01/01/2020 13:45

My parents told me I didn't have to pay back the second half of what I owed them from going travelling which was amazing and gave me the chance to start saving much sooner.

bevmichelle47 · 01/01/2020 14:58

Definitely no help from my parents at all. Myself and hubby had to pay everything for it. We worked all hours we could so we could afford to buy a house. They never had to worry about a mortgage as they lived with my nan (mums mother) and when she passed they had the house.
The hardest part i think is saving for that lumpsum for the deposit, especially when you have rent and bills to pay ontop. But anyway we did it and so glad it was all worth it.

Cashy17 · 01/01/2020 15:34

I had no help at all as my parents were running their own business and struggled all the time. I worked hard, saved hard and eventually it paid off.
Im proud to say everything we now have we did it ourselves.

cuppawithbiccies · 01/01/2020 16:46

neither set of parents could afford to provide any financial support when we bought our house. It was our responsibility to work hard, save for a deposit and figure out all the logistics. We did get some second hand household goods from both sets of parents when we move in!

womblelancs · 01/01/2020 17:12

I didn't get any financial assistance from my parents when I bought my first home, but 15 years later, they did buy new double glazed windows and doors for me, for which I was very grateful.

sarahm1234 · 01/01/2020 20:00

They gave me the money for a deposit, without them we would never have been able to buy a house.

lynsmagoo · 01/01/2020 21:20

We used money given from guests at our wedding to put the deposit down on a house, alongside the governments help to buy isa which we both opened an account each. However my parents gave us so much money towards our wedding which paid for the venue, without that we would have had to take a loan and use the wedding money to pay it back. We were very fortunate to have that were financially able to help us and will be eternally grateful to them.

KittyKat88 · 01/01/2020 23:06

My mum came through for me - she gave my sister and I £40k each to put towards a property. We just made sure we found a house well within our budget and could afford the repayments. She really was our lifesaver!

MillyVanilli222 · 02/01/2020 21:15

My parents have helped us out with some deposit money, we're still in the process of buying, which I feel incredibly grateful for - not everyone has this privelege. They've also been great at helping talk through options and advising on legal/procedure.

katieskatie82 · 02/01/2020 23:09

no neither sets of parents contributed. My husband and i saved up for a deposit on a property ourselves

AlliKaneErikson · 03/01/2020 02:39

Short of coming to the bank for the initial meeting, accompanying me on house viewings and helping me move furniture in, my parents pretty much left it all to me (my choice!) in terms of actually ‘buying’ the house. I was lucky to buy at just the right time (1999) and I was only 23, but in a steady job. Houses were very affordable in our area.
I worry that I won’t be able to help financially when my children are old enough, although we have been realistic and have told them not to ‘expect’ hand outs, but that we’ll help as much as possible.
(NB I was lucky to but when I did and to have paid quite a bit of mortgage off before I had an accident that cut my wages) massively.

pinkjjf27 · 03/01/2020 13:18

No help form my parents, my mum was of the mine set you made your bed go lie on it. My mum believed that a women’s role was to look after her kids and no more than that, My first husband was violent and abusive but she said it was my duty to stay with him . She believed social housing was for life and was horrified when I went back to university after my husband left us. She accused me of being a bad mother for going on to get a degree and then a job she called social services on me. I made it out of social housing and I bring my kids up differently I encourage them rather than put them down. But no there was no help or support from my parents who think I am odd for wanting to be more than they were.

HelenSw4les · 03/01/2020 21:30

Unfortunately my parents were unable to help us get on the property ladder; however luckily I did follow their lifestyle of saving for a rainy day which helped me save for a mortgage on my first home so there advice has helped, even though it wasn't in monetary terms.

suewilly · 03/01/2020 22:25

My parents didn't have anything to be able to help me to get on the property ladder, but they one thing they did show me was how important it was to own your own property. All of my aunts and uncles were in rented homes, so I always knew I wanted to buy my own because that's what my parents did.

Sleepybumble · 04/01/2020 08:10

My mum gave us 10k as a deposit, and lent us 30k for a extension. We are very grateful that she's done this.

emmav6 · 04/01/2020 20:18

no help from my mum(single parent) and would never expect family to help out. i was a student and worked when i got my first mortgage back in 2001 after saving for the deposit

Mariobug25 · 04/01/2020 20:56

They didn’t.
I live in London so it’s pretty impossible if I’m honest. We are on our 7th year of renting now. Can’t find the tens of thousands for a deposit while paying huge rent. I live in hope I’ll win a few bob on the lottery one day though!! Maybe once the children are older we can start to save seriously. I’m desperate for a home I can call my own.