Would you and your partner take time off work if companies offered 6 months paid parental leave for all?

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Having a new baby is an exciting time regardless of whether you’re a mum or a dad, and spending time with them in those first few months is a precious experience. A year ago Aviva introduced its equal paid parental leave policy, where all employees can take up to 12 months off, with no need for mums to share their maternity allowance. With this in mind, Aviva would like to hear your thoughts on giving all parents the same amount of time off.

Here’s what Caroline Prendergast, Interim Chief People Officer at Aviva has to say: “We decided to make all parents at Aviva eligible for the same amount of paid and unpaid time off, regardless of gender, sexual orientation or how they became a parent. We thought that dads would want to spend time with their new arrivals, just as mums do. One year on, our experience shows that with financial barriers removed, they do just that.”

You can find out more about Aviva as an employer here.

If all companies offered 6 months paid parental leave, do you think your spouse or partner would be prepared take the time off work to share childcare duties? If not, why not?

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I think it would be a wonderful thing. 6 months with my husband and baby would have been amazing. Unfortunately my husband is self employed so this was never an option for us. With our baby also arriving at 29 weeks the stresses of those early days would have been eased if my husband could have been around more; however we would have spent the first 2 months of leave in hospital, leaving just 4 short months at home and regularly attending appointments. I would therefore encourage a review for self employed people and premature births.

I understand people's concern about breastfeeding - because we're doing shared leave rather than me having it all we've introduced bottles of expressed milk from early on, which has been a hassle - but given that only 17% of three month olds in the UK currently are exclusively breastfed realistically that's not the reason why the majority of families don't use shared parental leave - it's money, and a sense that only mums can do babycare.

(and I know the Aviva policy isn't shared parental leave, and is much more generous than it, but that's what people have started talking about)

Very progressive and egalitarian policy. Would make AVIVA an especially attractive employer. Managed to do a bit of SPL with my husband for DC 2 was invaluable. It really helped the bond with father and child, it increased DH confidence and helped our relationship as understanding both roles working outside the home and working at home with a baby. However from my understanding this policy is even more generous. You can still breast feed by expressing and once they are weaned less reliant on the breast anyway. Well done AVIVA 👏

I think this is an excellent policy, I knew a couple that worked for Aviva where the dad took his leave after the mum, 6 months paid leave one after the other. Compared to my partner’s measly two weeks, he would definitely have liked to have liked this shared leave. However, the only problem for me is the breastfeeding issue, and I would have found expressing at work difficult (no where other than loos to do this). But, I think the policy should exist regardless of this, as choice should be available for parents should they wish to take shared leave.

Absolutely right. I say this as someone who is primary earner. DP gave up work to be main carer. If parental leave had been an option, would have definitely taken it

This is a brilliant policy, and more employers should be promoting time off for both parents. We have done two rounds of shared parental leave, because it's important for DH to support my return to work and it's important for me that he gets time to enjoy the DC.

I appreciate that not everyone wants to, and that's fine, but would like to point out that you can still breastfeed when you go back to work. Although our first in particular was a bottle refuser, there is always a way of getting some expressed milk into them (sippy cup in our case). Also someone mentioned it damaging their DH's career, but it's not like they have to disclose parental leave to future employers, so it seems pretty unlikely unless they work for a particularly unfriendly employer and never intend to change jobs.

Husband had two weeks off to support which was just about enough though I still didn't feel ready to be on my own looking after baby when he had to return to work. I definitely wouldn't have wanted husband there for the full six months with me and it wouldn't have made sense for him to have stayed home and me return to work as I wanted to exclusively breastfeed.

My husband and I did 7 months each, crossing over a month to have off together. I thought it was brilliant, he loved his time off and our son is now equally attached to both of us I think.

Wish he'd worked for Aviva, though, he had to take it unpaid!

I think it's a good move from Aviva and a Father should get as much time to 'bond' (and this is coming from a single Mum - partner left us when she was 4 months). HOWEVER, in reality it really depends on circumstance. I've read the article but am still not sure if this affects the Mother's maternity pay..? Factors might include recovery time after the birth, the Mother's body has been through a lot and not all Mother's recover at the same rate. Also, if she is exclusively breast feeding it would make it more difficult, if she went back after six months, therefore, both partners would have to agree they were happy to express or formula feed or a combination. DD's Father saw it as more of a 'holiday' when he was on Paternity and spent his time watching the World Cup or playing computer games. Whilst I appreciate there are a lot of men who would want to spend time with their new arrival, both parents should take on the bonding and household tasks etc. rather than seeing it as a holiday.

I think it's a superb idea in theory, but not sure how practical it is.
My husband works for a car dealership and his industry is still very male dominant and still infected with sexism and misogyny, which is shameful.
I asked him how comfortable he would feel about this and he said that he would definitely get a 'hard time' from his colleagues if he were to take parental leave!

Full marks Aviva for recognising that different families have different needs and allowing dads to support mums and bond with their babies during an extended leave! Does this apply to same sex partners too?

My husband and I talked about shared parental leave but couldn’t make the finances work. I think there was also a little bit of fear. There is an assumption that women will do the early caring because ... well, they had the baby, right?! I think the prospect of caring for a new born is scary and tough for some men - over and above any concerns about the mechanics of feeding etc.

I agree with earlier posts about the pay and leave issues being something that need addressing regardless of whether men are affected (many companies don’t let female staff have 6m paid leaves, let along their partners!). I also hope that normalising family leave will remove some of the barriers and stigma around returning to work post baby.

I'm more impressed with the 6 months paid leave they now provide. I only got 16 weeks when I worked there so slightly jealous that they now offer this haha.

My husband 'took' 4 weeks of my 52 week entitlement
It was fabulous. He added these 4 weeks into the end of his 2 weeks paternity leave when my baby was born.
So we were off together at the same time for the first 6 weeks of my baby's life. It helped so much as I had a c section and an older toddler to entertain.

After his 6 weeks of paternity leave was up I felt confident to look after both my children.

It just means I have to go back after 48 weeks instead of taking the full 52 weeks, which I am more than happy to do.

It's a great idea if you want it. For us it wouldn't have worked practically, I breastfed until over a year and returning to work with breastfeeding would have been harder to do earlier, especially as my job is not hugely compatible with pumping. Luckily my husband works flexibly anyway so was able to spend a lot of time with us throughout both maternity leaves and has earned enough flexi to top up the paternity leave to a month each time.

It's a lovely idea but a financial difficulty for a lot of people.

I asked him how comfortable he would feel about this and he said that he would definitely get a 'hard time' from his colleagues if he were to take parental leave!

Well, clearly that's a deal breaker then - after all, women never suffer any harm to their careers at all from having children, do they?

This policy would be such a game-changer for me and I wish every workplace offered what Aviva offer. My DH would definitely use it if available to him and I'd love to be able to share the leave equally. I do however think policies work at their best when you can start your period of enhanced pay whenever you like within that first year, for better flexibility and financial sense.

We calculated shared parental leave and really wanted it to be an option but financially it just didn't work out for us - DH would have had to start SPL really early after the birth to get an enhanced level of pay and it would have made more sense for us if he could take over after my enhanced maternity pay ended at 6 months. It's also a worry that your job isn't protected in the same way if you move from maternity leave to shared parental leave in my workplace.

I think it sounds amazing. If I'm reading it right, there's a fair amount of flexibility built in as well which is excellent. Those two weeks after ds1 was born were not enough - I really struggled when DH had to go back to work and if he'd been able to stay home for another couple of weeks I think life would have been a lot easier. He did "take" some of my maternity leave after I went back to work, getting SMP from his employer for 6 weeks or so which was fantastic, but the option of being paid full pay would have made this a lot easier and he could have taken more. As it is, he's now a SAHD. If he'd had the option to take six months paid leave, it's very possible we'd both now be working. Instead, he took the statutory period, then subsequently resigned and has never gone back....

Okay, I think I've overstated this as DH didn't really enjoy his job and we were keen for less childcare for DS who was challenging. But if he'd been offered six months pay, I think he would have been happy to go back for a year or so to "pay that back" which might have led to new or different opportunities.

I think it’s a great idea.

DH’s employer only offered the statutory 2 weeks paternity leave at the statutory pay. Even if they’d let him take longer than 2 weeks, it wouldn’t have been financially viable on the statutory paternity pay.

Being able to take longer off work with full pay would have been great, especially with our premature baby and with our c-section baby.

Love it, and I wish it was offered where my dp currently works!
He has already said that he wants to spend as much time at home with me and little one when we have a baby, and we both think it's a shame that we don't have progressive paternity opportunities like those presented at Aviva, or in Scandinavian countries.

Hopefully more companies take on this role of thinking - it gives men more time to be at home with their new family, and women the chance to recover and have some pressure lifted! Also keeps he scope open for women to return to work early, if the father wishes to use his 6 months and the woman to return to work!

Also removes the pressure on the man to return to work as men are usually the main/higher earner and cannot afford to take unpaid paternity leave (which is currently offered by most companies, leaving households running at a deficit)

The choice to take this is good news, and will be a great help to many people.

Having said that, my son’s father would have poked sticks in his eyes rather than spend six months at home with his son.

Discussed this with my husband, he was horrified that I might want him to stay at home after each child was born! He is a great husband and a fantastic father but he made it very clear from the outset that he doesn't want to do the day to day childcare and to be honest when he has had too, when I've had a girls weekend or when I had my second child he did step up but he found it very stressful and the house was a complete tip!!! I'd rather him be at work, it makes my life easier!! Some men are just not cut out for parental leave and they should be able to say so without stigma.

Some men are just not cut out for parental leave and they should be able to say so without stigma.
Fine as long as we’re all happy for mums to get back to work after 2 weeks too with no stigma too.