Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Sponsored threads

This topic is for sponsored discussions. If you'd like to run one with us, please email [email protected].

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

MNHQ

Mumsnet users tell Dove how they introduce a self-care routine to teenagers

257 replies

EllieMumsnet · 19/10/2018 08:59

NOW CLOSED

Before puberty hits, body odour isn't really a thing - ah remember the joy of rarely washing hair, not thinking about the comparative benefits of soap and bodywash, and being utterly ignorant of the verb 'to exfoliate'? - but all too soon that comes to an end. Trying to introduce a self-care routine for the first time to your children can be a tricky subject to navigate, which is why Dove would love to know your experiences and tips for how to have the conversation with your teenagers and how you went about picking products for them e.g. deodorant.

Here’s what Dove has to say: “At Dove we know that you want to give the best support to your teenagers as they go through the emotional, physical and hormonal changes of puberty. It can be a sensitive time and your relationship with them goes through changes too. They still need their parents’ care – just a different kind of care to when they were younger, one that spans both practical help and emotional support. We are interested in hearing how you approach conversations about introducing a self-care routine with your teenagers, especially when it comes to deodorants and body odour.”

Did you have conversations with your DC as and when body and hormonal changes were occuring? Perhaps you did a lot of research into trying to find the right products for your child to use? If you found any great products, such as the perfect deodorant, please do share them! What age was your child when you first started to have conversations about self-care with them? How did you bring it up?

However you introduced a self-care routine to your DC and whatever products you bought/used, share them on the thread below and you’ll be entered into a prize draw where one winner will win a £300 voucher of their choice (from a list).

Thanks and good luck!
MNHQ

Standard Insight T&Cs Apply

Mumsnet users tell Dove how they introduce a self-care routine to teenagers
OP posts:
Byrdie · 20/10/2018 16:24

My eldest isn't a teenager quite yet but she is at that age where she needs a bra, gets the odd spot and needs to put on deodorant. We've been bra shopping, bought deodorants and I've bought her some mild facial products. I try and make her aware that she can ask me anything and am very honest if she asks me anything also. She's a bit hairy and asked me about shaving jer legs and we talked about the pros and cons about that and other options. She decided it didn't bother her enough yet. We'll see how she does but she is now washing when she realised she is smelly rather than me dragging her to a bath or chucking her in a shower.

Srathore · 20/10/2018 18:56

Always have a good understanding of what products to use for individual skincare needs.

OnlyToWin · 20/10/2018 19:53

One dd is in the shower for hours. One dd needs a few gentle reminders. I have found a way to encourage her is to provide products that appeal to her such as foaming shower gel and exciting bath bombs! I am really strict about tooth brushing, particularly as she has braces now so I do remind about this lots. I have on occasion also been quite direct about hair being in need of a wash as I would rather she heard it from me than her peers. It’s not that she does not want to be clean - she would just rather be doing other stuff than be in the shower!!!

Beeziekn33ze · 20/10/2018 21:30

I agree with asuwere. The process is gradual starting with toilet training, then learning to clean themselves afterwards and wash hands properly. You move on from giving them a bath or shower to just being around to make sure they are doing everything necessary.
Hairwashing for short haired children can be fairly straightforward but for long hair most likely needs adult input for much longer.
As for teeth, many dentists advise either doing or supervising teeth cleaning until they are 10.
As puberty approaches sensible and sensitive discussion in needed. Sometimes it comes better from an older sibling or an aunt or uncle (as appropriate) than a parent. Make sure that all the toiletries the child needs are always in the house and that they start to take responsibility for putting them on the shopping list as they need more.

magentastardust · 21/10/2018 00:24

It has been slightly different with my children, with my son, I have had to sort of hint or start up conversations just about making sure he had deodorant with him for PE at school or leaving face washes suitable for teenage skin in the shower and just subtly advising or reminding about showers and washing clothes etc. With my daughter it has been much more at her lead, she has been much more self aware or I guess maybe aware of what others are doing around her so happily comes shopping with me for necessary products and is more aware of 'smelling nice' or having 'nice clean hair' .

Pastychef · 21/10/2018 04:57

We take the DC shopping and let them choose their own products, gives them ownership

TracyKNixon · 21/10/2018 06:41

Talk about puberty and hygiene eg how to stay clean and healthy by washing your body and hair regularly, changing underwear and clothes etc

renas · 21/10/2018 07:00

Buy them good quality products tell them what they’re for and leave them to it that’s what I did.

MouseRatFan · 21/10/2018 07:10

I think it's important to get them involved in purchasing the products that appeal to them. Take them on a quick shipping trip and let them pick new products to try.
It's a fine line of being supportive but not embarrassing them though!

Ratbagcatbag · 21/10/2018 07:14

I found with my DSS (now 20) it was sometimes being blunt and forcing the issue. They seem to be nose blind, and my DSS hates showering everyday. We just were firm with him that he needed to do it, and made him strip his bedding every week too. Through being consistent it just became routinefor him.
Deodorant wise, he had two types. And antiperspirant and a spray so he tended to use both. Typical teenage boy favourites of Lynx, superdry and FCUK. He didn’t really have a preference.

Self care for his skin was much harder. He suffered from acne, but was not bothered by it, it looked horrific though so it took some time to get through to him he needed to see the Drs and get it sorted. He still suffers now but it’s better than it was.

janney3 · 21/10/2018 07:34

I think the talks and more frequent washing builds up naturally as the process of puberty is not overnight.
I try to buy them unscented 'natural' products that are better for sensitive skin. I also encourage washing properly rather than a heavy scent to mask smells!

samcornfield · 21/10/2018 07:51

Lots of nagging! My son still thinks it's ok to walk around smelly!

Montydoo · 21/10/2018 08:21

I think children learn from example, they see their parents with a healthy self care routine, and will copy and in my case as grandma would always buy shower gels, bath lotions and potions and deodorants for Christmas, it was no effort at all to see my two DS shower daily, and bathe regularly too. Deodorant is used sparingly, with an emphasis on when sport was on the agenda that day, or the weather is particularity hot.

DJASKEW · 21/10/2018 08:21

Present it as an option for something they may want to consider, in an effort to be helpful.

SSCRASE123 · 21/10/2018 08:22

Leaving it till teens is far too late. Explain to them as they are younger how you keep yourself neat, tidy and clean and encourage them to do the same. My lad loves to pick out his own smellies, usually football related, so it's fairly straightforward. We do, like most parents, have to check up that they are using them correctly some nights.

hmariez · 21/10/2018 08:24

Talking to them directly. Help them understand and be a positive role model

Jeffingandeffing · 21/10/2018 08:30

My daughter’s school blazer would start to smell after only a couple of wears so a good deodorant, changing her school shirts daily, teaching her how to use the washing machine and daily showers were a must! She suffers from acne too but spending all the money in the world on face washes, creams etc make no difference. Unfortunately only antibiotics and roaccutane have helped.

glenka · 21/10/2018 08:31

We went shopping together and let them choose some nice and effective products for themselves to get them started on self care.

Spices001 · 21/10/2018 08:32

It’s been a slow process but we are now getting there ! Simple products & a good deodorant..... hair washing has taken the longest but arguments are now at a minimum ;-)

KAKADU2001 · 21/10/2018 09:12

In still the right values from an early age and then there should be no need at a later date to deal with the issue of self care.

AR2012 · 21/10/2018 09:17

Basic instructions on personal hygiene. If there's a skin condition like eczema or acne that doesn't go away with off the shelf products. Then we'll get a dermatologist appointment.

cp0649 · 21/10/2018 09:19

Lead by example but don't clean up after them

janeyf1 · 21/10/2018 09:26

It is an ongoing process, my dc needs nudging because she doesn't think of self-care as a priority and is unaware of the impact the changes she is going through have on her. If I don't regularly hint and get nice toiletries for her, I fear other people will embarrass her with nasty comments

Ganne1 · 21/10/2018 09:37

I feel it's the same as with education. You have to instil a sense of the importance of their doing it themselves for their own future. Without embarrassment, just go through the basics and leave it to them.

maryandbuzz1 · 21/10/2018 09:38

I don’t think we really needed to discuss this with our son. We were entirely led by him asking for the products he needed. There was obviously discussion going on at school whether it was curriculum based ortalk in the playground. The only conversation I remember having with him was about oral hygiene which he took onboard.