Share the secret lives you’ve imagined for your neighbours with Sky Cinema - £300 voucher to be won NOW CLOSED

[JustineBMumsnet]

Though you live closely to each other, it’s possible that you know very little about your neighbours other than how terrible their parking is. But, that doesn’t stop you imagining what might be going on inside their walls. Inspired by their premiering of Keeping Up With the Joneses, starring Isla Fisher, John Hamm and Gal Gadot Sky Cinema would like to hear about the funny rumours you’ve heard about or the secret lives you’ve imagined for your neighbours (past or present).

Here’s what Sky Cinema has to say: “Sky Cinema makes it easy to find something you want to watch by showing a New movie Premiere every single day of the year. This summer there is a fantastic range of movies perfect for movie date night in from Keeping Up with the Joneses, to Allied to Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find them.

So, whether you’re convinced that the woman at the end of the road is MI5, you have some inventive theories about why the neighbours leave the house so early on a Sunday, or you’re a curtain twitcher who treats the neighbour’s lives like entertainment, share your stories below to be entered into a prize draw where one MNer will win a £300 John Lewis voucher.

Thanks and good luck!

MNHQ

Standard Insight T&Cs apply

That the next door neighbours are secretly spys to trying to get secret information.

My neighbour has about five cars on their drive, so I'm convinced he's part of an international vehicle theft ring!

I have my suspcions that one of my neighbours might be the missing Lord Lucan.

My new neighbour is an international spy
He moved in 8 weeks ago and I've only seen him twice

We think our neighbour is an international hacker. That's because she presents as so utterly terrified and unknowing about technology that we wonder how she's got through life so far, and think she must be up to something! She's intelligent, not old, must have used IT in her job yet when it comes to mobile phones, cash lines, the internet, even TV packages, she's like a rabbit in the headlights. She's lovely though!

Pretty sure my new neighbour is a ghost. I often hear all sorts of unsettling strange noises and moans and groans late into the night, not to mention her gentleman visitors often shoot out the door at lightning speed as though they have seen something truly startling (my son says it is probably because she hasn't shaved in 10 years)

An apparition for sure

The guy over the road is always having work done to his house and has a ridiculous amount of CCTV - we think he must have a luxury pad with pool and a vault with gems in it - we know he has a lift in his house

I live in an area of high deprivation and poverty I am one of a few employed people I commute to work so get up and leave before any one is awake and get I home when everyone is inside and watching TV. I am a lecture so have a long summer working from home, last week one of neighbour stopped me and said " oh I thought you were dead I never see you or your family " The lady across the road has a beautiful garden but I have never ever seen her or anyone else tending it so I wonder if she has magical powers and waves a wand on her. garden. The lady next door must have kids because I hear her shouting at them when I am at home 24/7 but when I took a bag of fruit over for them once she said there are no kids here so maybe she watches loud tv where someone shouts at kids with the same name all day?

My lovely neighbour must have been in the witness protection programme since he never responded when I called his name! At weekends, he reproduced scenes from the Great Escape by the various thumping and wheezing noises coming from his garden shed - I half expected to fall into Tom, Dick or Harry any day soon. By day he was wont to regularly point out - with a wry grin - that the facsia and guttering on my guard hut required a bit of spit and polish. Dead
now but not forgotten - I still miss him a year on.

One of my neighbours retired and overnight he changed from a suave salesman into a Chuckle Brother! I imagine him exchanging "To me! To you!" with his missus as they watch TV.

I have a neighbour who is a avid on-line shopper, always having parcels, packets and boxes delivered, I had to sign for a hot tub a couple of months ago as they were out. We think that she is a secret millionaire who has had to downsize but still wants the designer lifestyle. If she catches the bus to town she always looks 'a million dollars' with her designer wear and layers of make up and heavy fragrance. In reality she is probably a insecure individual and heavily in debt - but you never know, she could be related to Bill Gates after all.

We know all our neighbours quite well except for one house at the end as we do not see them much... I imagine that they go out at weird hours because they are spies, they have normal cars, make no noise coming and going yet because of the hours they keep they don't have many friends!

i like the entertainment of watching neighbours and even better that i keep myself to myself

The flat myself and my husband lived in when we were first married was on the top floor of three floors. The man who lived below us was very strange, kept odd hours and seemed to spend a long time sitting in his car when he arrived back from anywhere. As the post wasn't put in individual mail boxed - all just put through one to be distributed ourselves - I noticed he received a lot of offical envelopes with On Her Majesty's Service printed on them. I used to imagine that he worked for MI5 or similar!

I'm convinced my neighbours are involved in some dodgy business - too many people arriving at odd hours.

My neighbours are lovely when ever I see them! Which is not much... they always off on holidays. I'm sure they live somewhere else and just pop by when they feel like it

One of ours "doesn't believe" in caffeine, alcohol, sugary foods etc - but she looks about 15 years older than she is, so we think secretly in her home there is a dungeon where she smokes 60 a day and drinks tea and coffee, stuffing her face. No one can possibly watch Bake Off without eating!! This idea was reinforced by them getting a bigger ventilation pipe installed through the roof - to me that is proof she is down there with an extractor fan puffing away. She has a small husband who's hair grows like one of those troll dolls - we think she lets him grow it long so she can sit him on the mantle piece and ruffle up his hair for good luck. He would probably let her do it to as she is a bit of a control freak. My other half reckons he takes 2 hours power washing the car so he doesn't have to go back inside (he said if she was his wife he would probably do the same).

I think one of the neighbours down the road is some kind of secret agent or something - he never takes his sunglasses off. Conclusive proof!

Mine have callers all through the night & can be seen passing small packages through the living room window?! Definitely drug barons or spies

The woman next door lives alone and she is the most nosey person ever, but she's rubbish at snooping so we always catch her at it ! Anyway she has a regular stream of weedy, little old men visiting her house and she is quite a large lady so we have decided she is offering dominatrix services to these men who seem to call round regularly. We have decided this for no other reason than she is bossy and rattles around in a very large house on her own, so we think she has probably kitted out a couple of rooms with her equipment.

Our neighbours are secretly aliens and their poor dog who has skin issues is often seen at the window (wearing a cone of shame) waiting for instructions from the mother ship. The lady has purple hair and the man has a very shiny head and big ears. I rest my case.

We are the black sheep of our street no one speaks to us, apart from the occasional note stuck on our car.
We have the '50 year old virgin' who lives in next door who does nothing but get drunk and then complains he's skint (walls are thin), and 'Mrs Bucket' who always looks immaculate and amazing for having 3 kids. However we are convinced she's having an affair, as we've seen her smooching with another fella!

i would imagine my neighbour to be trading in something as there`s vans parked up their drives frequently so they are obvious drug dealers

There was once a house in our street where lots of strange men called. We nicknamed it 'the house of ill repute'. Fortunately the landlord heard about the goings on and the occupants left.

recently someone in my local community won the lottery ( a lot) and I have convinced myself it is the neighbour opposite, they are always on holiday and have loads of parcels delivered, i'm sure they are drinking champagne and digging swimming pools secretly!!!