Tell Mumsnet Flendr about the outrageous experiences you’ve had when people have been brass-necked with money – £300 Love2Shop voucher to be won! NOW CLOSED

[EmmaMumsnet]

Collecting money for shared presents, holidays, dinners etc. can be a pretty stressful experience and take a lot of organising. It can also be a massive hit to the bank account when someone doesn’t pay on time. On top of this, it can lead to strained relations between friends and family – people say they’ve paid when they haven’t, they forget to pay or they think they are no longer liable when they pull out of that concert last minute because they had something better to do.

Have you ever found yourself in a difficult situation when chasing people to pay you back for something? Did it lead to awkwardness or an argument? Did people make up ridiculous excuses to get out of paying their share? Whatever the story, Mumsnet Flendr would like to hear it!

Here’s what Mumsnet Flendr says: “We are excited to introduce Mumsnet Flendr, our official online platform for organising cash collections and fundraising activities. If you find yourself paying on behalf of others – whether it is a night out, tickets to a concert, hen party or collective birthday gift - use our platform and make your life that little bit easier.”

Please share your story with Mumsnet Flendr below and you will be entered into a prize draw where one MNer will win a £300 Love2Shop voucher.

If you would like to sign up to trial Mumsnet Flendr, please click here

Thanks & good luck!

MNHQ

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I have a similar one....
My beloved grandma died last year in her 90's and there are four of us grandchild. My dad is an only child..
We were super close and I wanted a small do at her church..... oh no says my sister (who is in a ltr with a celeb) and books a posh hotel..
At the wake she presents my dad with the bill.... doesn't put her hand in her pocket once. For flowers or anything.... meh..

wannabestressfree sorry for your loss

alwaysontheoutside you can only hope that Karma takes a hand - and I thought my sister was bad!

My rich bitch sister in law is great at deciding to buy expensive gifts for people without consultung us and then asking for "our share"

My brother in law is a pain in the arse when it comes to money.
He owes my husband thousands of pounds - well over 10,000 - and has done for 10 years.
Despite crying poverty and insisting he could not pay any money back, 3 years ago he had the most ridiculous, over the top wedding and honeymoon (around £20k in total) He says it was all on credit cards (fools) so still didn't mean he had the money to pay anything back. But seriously? Couldn't he pay those repayments to my husband? He still says no, it's but the same.
When the marriage broke down, he came to live with us, completely rent and bill free for 8 MONTHS because we are nice people and he was in need.
Fast forward to new girlfriend, still crying poverty yet managed to have 3 holidays and a new car.
I am completely fed up but he has rhino skin and when the subject is raised he gives a sort of pathetic half smile and says "what can I do?"
That is the essence of brass necked to me.

My brother has a massive brass neck when it comes to money. I remember being in the pub with him when we were skint students. He hadn't bought a round (but had taken plenty of drinks). When pressure was applied he protested "I've only got a fifty and I don't want to fritter it away in the pub"!

I had a friend come to stay with her son. We had plenty of food in but he is going through a fussy stage and only eats certain pasta shapes which is fair enough. I had to take my daughter for her jabs while she was here so I suggested that she popped to co-op while we're at the surgery to get the pasta. When we got out the surgery she told me I owe her 79p for the pasta.

She stayed 3 days and drunk our wine and ate our food (fair enough) but couldn't stump up for a bag over pasta to feed her so .

I used to work with a man who collected coppers in his desk drawer specifically to give to collections. 32p in for a liked and respected colleague's retirement collection. It would have been better to not put anything in that treat colleagues/collections with such disdain.

Collections in work are a nightmare - one staff member is notorious for not giving to collections but expecting to get when it is their birthday - at xmas they refused to give £1 to take part in the xmas party games or to bring any food for the bring a plate as they were far too broke....so they didnt get to take part and then bitched about it - a couple of days later they spent £10 on glitter and tinsel tassles to decorate an item for a club event they were attending! Not only that they decorated the items in the staff area and left a massive mess meaning the poor cleaners had to come clean it up.

Just now at the hairdressers- took ds1 for a quick tidy up and got to the till where she says "that's £5.50 for the cut, so £15.50 with tip"
I was taken aback so just paid, only now I'm wondering if she really just stipulate a tenner as a compulsary tip!

One of my colleagues never pays towards the tea and coffee kitty but still helps herself. It is really annoying. They are also the first to eat any cakes/biscuits bought in but they never buy any.

I suggested a holiday destination (had already been to the town), and helped organize it. Friend of a friend booked accommodation. I paid promptly.

During the holiday she said she couldn't remember me paying and, since I didn't have a receipt (!), I would have to pay again. Despite everyone else supporting me, she simply wouldn't back down, and I wasn't up to arguing (had already sat out the day's activities as I was sick) so I paid again. This wiped out all my spending money - had to borrow cash to pay for food.

So, I paid twice for a holiday I'd already been on, during which I was sick. Sigh.

Years ago I went on a work Christmas dinner. It was subsidised so we all only had to pay £10.
At the end of the meal the supervisor asked everyone to put in their £10. There were 12 of us and only 11 tenners appeared. No one would admit to not having paid. It was very awkward.
In the end the supervisor paid the extra £10.
I've always wondered who didn't pay. I really have no idea.

Office collections when people were leaving were the worst part of my job. Who is it that puts in the 2P - happened every time!

I've organised Secret Santa at work before. You can guarantee that at least a couple of people won't purchase and wrap a present like they should, meaning that I end up buying them so no one is disappointed. Grr.

I hate anything to do with sponsoring- I usually avoid it with my dcs and put a lump sum in myself.
But on the one occasion I did ask colleagues, I gave up asking one person (who had been particularly generous, on paper). She always had an excuse. I gave up in the end, and paid for her (which was a stretch). She was definitely not short of money- and another time a group of us went for lunch. Most of us paid cash, including enough to cover a tip. She took the cash, and paid by card. Clearly just the 'bill' amount, as she was then scrabbling for change for a tip the rest of us had already put in for.. Most people were leaving by then, so didn't notice. She made about £20 profit.. She is a lovely woman- but this made me see her very differently.

My sons preschool always does a charity "stick things on this picture and collect sponsorship money" thing but the first time we did it, we ended up paying nearly the whole lot ourselves as no one paid up!!!

My sister is the queen, she never, ever carries cash and often forgets her purse so she has no cards. Her salary is double mine, and I make a good salary, but I always pay for her. Over the course of a year I think I spot her a couple of hundred pounds of goods!

These are all awful, why are some people so entitled?
My ex-DS was one of these. Her favourite phrase was to criticise others for "champagne lifestyle on lemonade money", she never did see the irony of that statement.
When I was in my first job aged 16 and got a Christmas bonus she guilt tripped me out of it because she couldn't pay off her credit card.
Day trips out and take aways were expected - as were someone else's payments.
Christmas requests would be met with £50 Playstation games for her then DH and kids, my DH got a shirt which he took back as it was the wrong size, and was told it was £3 in the sale.
No more. Ex-DS now.

DBIL and his wife came to us just before their fancy wedding asking to borrow a good few thousand pounds. It ended up coming out of my account with my hard earned cash in as DH was away. I CLEARLY discussed with them the fact it was a loan and not a gift. They never payed it back despite me asking a few times. They went on holiday and did a lift conversion instead.

We tried suggesting a payment plan it it only lasted a month.

It's totally their fault but it makes me pissed off with my lovely DH too as he wont really ask for the money.

It was years ago but it still annoys me.

We are well off and had previously paid for several holidays etc for them. We did this quietly iyswim. Those were gifts and happily given. We never mention them. Since 'stealing' the wedding money from us we have stopped helping them in other ways.

I'd never ever borrow money and not pay it back or at least try to pay it back and keep the person who leant it to me informed.

DP's 'friend' borrowed £3,000 from us about eight or nine yrs ago as an emergency, he was in trouble with HMRC. His wife doesn't know, and he didn't want me to know, but I do, as DP said he wasn't going to keep it a secret from me. Friend paid back £2,000 within the first two years, but appears to have 'forgotten' the remaining £1,000, even though DP has mentioned it to him several times, and this friend has been on several family holidays, obtained a dog, bought lots of new gadgets for his house, bought cars for his sons, etc etc. I can't say anything, as I have been sworn to secrecy, and his wife still has absolutely no idea.

Sister-in-law regularly 'tucks us up' over money. We've gone out for meals where she has five members of her family, BiL has six members of his family and our children haven't come along so there are only two of us, but the entire bill is split three ways, so we end up paying about £100+ more than we need to for each shared meal. She says it is our fault that our children weren't there, rather than doing the fair headcount. She suggests buying joint presents for In-Law's presents (large presents, like televisions) DP pays, with the promise from her that she will pay him back. Of course, she never does. The sum over a couple of years amounted to almost £500 (notwithstanding overpayment on restaurant bills), so when she organised a joint 80th birthday for their parents when we were all expected to contribute £300, she paid in advance, then we suggested to her that as she owes us far more than that, we could offset the amount. Needless to say, the suggestion didn't go down well!!!

As a result, DP's sister (TINA) and brother (TREVOR) don't speak to us any more, because we dared to ask for our money to be repaid. It is utterly bizarre. I feel as though I would never want to loan money to anyone now, no matter what dire straits they may be in, as all it has done is cause conflict and bad feeling, when all we were doing was trying to help people out when they needed it. And then they get so mean when they are asked to pay it back. Horrible, entitled behaviour.

Arrived late at a posh do for a friend at a London hotel, went straight to the table . We paid in advance for the meal but few days later we got an email asking for our share of the pre dinner bar bill..£70..and we'd had nothing. Needless to say, we just shelled out - I would hate to be that friend that everyone is moaning about here!

Out for a meal with colleagues and at the end we all put money ready for the bill rounding up to allow for a tip (e.g. if your meal came to £31 you put in £35)
Boss swept up all the money and headed to the bar - I happened to want a drink so followed. She paid with our cash using the tip money to cover her own meal.
She also never ever makes any contributions of biscuits/cake etc in work but always always stuffs her face with other peoples' offerings

So many cheeky people.... My worst one was organising a group visit to a caravan park. I paid all the deposits...everyone except one of the group paid me back really quickly.

I sent various reminders to the non-payer, no deposit. When the time came to pay the balance he paid that - but still no deposit.

We actually had the holiday - when he 'had no money' with him - and it was several weeks afterwards before I eventually got the £100 deposit out of him.

I make it a policy not to loan money to friends if at all possible! I learnt this after a planned holiday I was organising with family where we were all supposed to contribute the same amount to the 'pot'. My younger sister asked me if I could put in her share and promised she'd pay me back. The closer it got to the holiday I just thought she'd pay me back but she never did. We went on the hol, and she just blanked any discussion about it and I was too embarassed to make it an issue in front of the family because they didn't know. We've put it behind us now - but she never did pay me back!!

My old boss decided we would welcome a new team member by arranging a meal out and inviting them along. Only boss forgot her purse and I ended up paying for her. I only got my money back when after asking several times I sent her an email stating I was adding it to my expense sheet. Got it that very same day!