How can we make Britain more family-friendly?

[Carriemumsnet]

Mumsnet are launching an initiative to try and make Britain the most family-friendly country in Europe (well...the world actually, but we thought we'd start small ) Ambitious plan? Just a bit, but we think long overdue. We want to challenge companies - and we're talking everyone from travel firms to supermarkets, restaurants to mobile phone merchants - to join our programme and find out - from Mumsnetters - how they could make their industry more family-friendly. We're going to look at every aspect of how a company operates from how they market their goods to the welcome and facilities they provide to families. And then we want to encourage them to do business in a way that makes life easier for families not more difficult, and ultimately give Mumsnet Family-friendly awards to the ones that do it well.

Obviously we'll need lots of help and input from the folks who know most about all this - ie you. So before we really get going, we want to know what you think. What does family-friendly mean to you and what criteria should we use to judge whether a company is family-friendly or not? What do you love about what some companies are already doing and - just as important - what do you think they should stop doing? Is it the way companies try to sell products to you or your children that makes you cross or is it the fact that you can never squeeze your buggy down the aisle at your local coffee shop? Or both, or neither? If you could pick three things you'd change about any industry to make it more family friendly - what would they be?

Lots of questions but we'd love to hear your thoughts so please, post 'em here

Thanks

MNHQ

I too like the MN badge of approval idea.

I would like to see medium and large sized companies being obliged to publish their family friendly policies e.g. maternity leave, paternity leave, parental leave, flexible working etc etc on their websites.

These are important issues to understand when applying for a job, but are not the kind of questions that you can usually ask at the job interview itself...

Have read some of the thread so forgive me if already said. My observations are:

Bluewater shopping centre is very family friendly re toilets and are kept clean and can accommodate double buggies etc. I still dont like letting my 8 year old (I also have a 3 year old) to go into the mens toilet that he now insists on and (maybe) understandly is embarrassed to go the ladies now! However the family rooms accommodate us all.

I hate the fact that most 'family-friendly' restaurants always have chicken nuggets, chips, sausages etc which my children do not eat - there are few exceptions but not many. I tend to now order from the main 'adult' menu and my two share. My children also love Yo sushi which is surprisingly family-friendly and the children love sitting at 'the bar' and the whole experience.

We have a house in Spain and I love the fact that they are generally child friendly and are warm and welcoming in bars and restaurants and let the children sit at the bar and have a juice and have provided warm milk in a cup with a straw and the tapas size portions are perfect for kids. It is noticeable when we come home from Spain where you are looked upon by many as a nuisance because you have children/pushchair and my children are always well-behaved in restaurants.

I also hate places that want your money and purport to be child-friendly when in fact they are not. Wetherspoon is the worst for this. They say they are child-friendly but if you take children in and order a drink then your child MUST eat and you are only allowed two drinks (not that I want to go and get hammered with my children but it is the way that they make you feel immediately uncomfortable with children) - we went once for a late breakfast and would never go again at the way they treated us. Just be upfront and say no children - thats fine by me but dont purport to be something you are not as clearly you do not want children in there just our money.

I agree with smithagain.

It's interesting how uninspiring the responses have been given the broad remit of looking at "every aspect of how a company operates." Perhaps we've come to accept how companies work and don't question their marketing tactics etc...

I think one way we're ahead of many countries is in the number of companies who let you order online and have things delivered - now that is family friendly. Perhaps they could do with improving what happens when you're out though.

Ah, family toilets...for years I just didn't go to the loo when out because getting into a cublicle with a baby and toddler is impossible. And like hell I was going to leave the baby outside the cubicle, no matter how quick my wee.

More men in childcare! This will involve a number of things: Accepting that men and women are equal; That childcare is important to all and as such professional childcare warrants a proper wage (we pay more for car servicing than childcare, hence mechanics are paid more than childminders); acknowledgement that children and the elderly are an integral part of our community; and last but not least, that children are important and not just things that should be controlled in public.

• good quality affordable childcare for all like e.g. France has. Currently many families on modest incomes cannot afford for the 'second parent' to work as the childcare bill is bigger than the amount that the parent would earn. Madness.

• companies have good policies for working parents and can demonstrate that these are implemented.

• more protection for fathers who want to work part time or flexibly. This would involve a change to the current law. At the moment they are limited if an employer refuses, a woman may have an indirect sex discrimination claim a man's position is much trickier. This is unfair on men and it makes the situation more problematic for mothers as it entrenches mothers into part time work. If the situation was more equal mothers would face less discrimination.

SpeedyGonzalez, the British Houses thread sounds really interesting. Have tried to search for it but can't find it.

Pleasse can you or some other kind soul post a link? TIA

better choice on the child's menu, some places think its ok to serve any old crap at extortionate prices-do smaller portions of proper food please

children's departments on the GROUND floor!

I have a great idea for a company if anyone interested, around rewards for children-like our reward cards-mummy endorses at the checkout if child has been good, on 3rd visit with good behaviour, they get a treat!

Our new shopping centre has a family toilet - a huge cubicle way big enough for a big pram plus it has one adult size toilet and one child size toilet.

There should certainly be more of these family toilets around imo.

It is far too difficult to access buses with little ones, surely we can improve on this situation?

I think the UK is more family friendly than most of Europe if you mean putting highchairs, kids menus, crayons etc in to restaurants. Just back from France and all kids food was burger and fries. No child provision re chairs, pencils tc at all. Still welcoming to children but not as geared up for them. Still we do expect a lot to be child-centred. We went out a lot in the 1970s and just ate some of mum and dad's stuff and mucked about under the table. For me the attitude matters much more than the actual equipment etc.

We have brought ours up to be food snobs though. Yes indeed. They are quite discerning now and hate the bready pizzas with a smear of tinny tomato puree and two threads of rubber cheese etc. More imagination and smaller portions.

I think in terms of facilities the UK is very child friendly in comparison to many other countries (although France definitely has the best motorway stops with fab toilets for toddlers and baby changing facilities). However, I agree with many posters on here who have said that what really needs to change is people's unfriendly attitudes to children (and teens) in the UK. Yes, there are some horrible children around (as there are in other countries), but on the whole most children are ok and its funny how in the rest of Europe there are less anti-social problems and children aren't looked down upon as if they're a piece of shat. I don't expect everyone to love my child, but when I walk into a cafe or restaurant with him and evil/miserable crones glare at my DS when he hasn't made a peep is just plain weird.

ps. forgot to add, I agree with WoodyAllen and others who have said they don't want rubbery rubbish nuggets and pizzas for their DCs. I just give my DS some of my food as he is only 2 for goodness sake and wants to eat a small portion of something tasty and healthy!

Funny, I must live in a different part of the country to a lot of you.

Can't remember ever experiencing anti-child attitudes when out and about.
Never been a shortage of somewhere to stop and eat. When they were little, they just shared some of ours or each others food or as others have suggested, a starter. We've also asked for half size meals.

As to the cost of tickets etc, would love there to be a standard age when child prices change to adult - as long as it is higher (16?) rather than lower. Appreciate this can be difficult as these are businesses we're talking about, not charities, and a child of 5 still takes a whole seat or whatever, that an adult could have had at full rate.

Do agree that larger loo cubicles are useful though.

just got back from canada + many restaurants give small children their drinks in lidded cups with straws (like a maccy d takeaway style cup iyswim)

3 y old dd can drink out of an open cup, but filled to the brim as they are in restaurants is tempting fate!

There are some great ideas here - haven't read them all.

What kids need is safe space to play indoors and outdoors, good food and fresh air to breathe.

Macdonalds and department stores will make you pay for any child-friendly policies. That's why they have them, after all, to entice you in. They put their prices up to pay for every new, bigger toilet.

But you pay for them already as a tax payer, so why not get facilities for your children for free?

So - more parks (+ park keeper), soft play areas (brilliant invention!), leisure centres - and libraries and parents and toddler groups open at weekends.

More car-free areas in towns and cities.

Free public transport for kids.

Decent, affordable housing near to good schools and parks.

Rewarding jobs for parents.

I could go on - but am I boring you?

And why not get together with a friend and her kids and colonise a local cafe? If you go often enough, your presence there will encourage other families to join you and as you get to know the owner you will be able to request things that are not on the menu - beans on toast for a quid, for example. Much easier than a trip into town and your child will get used to a variety of food if you try different things from the menu.

For people coming into the country and also leaving make the airports more child friendly, More baby changing ( and well signposted) WITH a chair inside for BF mothers who don't want to sit in a chair with arm rests so they can't fit the baby in there as well. Or who would like a bit or privacy.
A decent even if small playing area for children with a few activities . Not just the money grabbing ride on machines.
If other Worldwide airports can manage it then so should we !

Definitely more areas in towns with no cars. Tree and kids. Tra la la.

Rosa - I NEEDED a chair with arms when I was BF to mimic the huge mound of pillows and scaffolding I had to construct at home. Never got the hang of standing in the street chatting and feeding but big admiration for the friends who did.

This is a really fascinating thread - we have been talking about FF in the office (as you might guess!) and we all agreed that going out to eat was one of the things that springs to mind first. Those chicken nuggets and places that allow 2 inches between tables. I am going to be putting together the Mumsnet FF pledge (charter/challenge - name tbc)so I'm starting to group together some of the Big Issues! I'd love to have some more feedback - like what does FF mean for older children? What happens when your kids hit 8/9/10 and up. What about older children and transport - or teenagers and nights out? It would also be good to get some thoughts on some of the big sectors and how they are doing - supermarkets, theme parks/attractions, airline? Any more thoughts very helpful! Vicki MNHQ

Hi

Really interested to see your post about marketing? This is an area I think is absolutely part of FF. Tell me more! Vicki MNHQ

have skim read thread but agree with many posts.

HATE narrow aisles or displays in middle of aisles so you can't navigate a pram easily (mothercare is the place that does this and annoys me the most!)

HATE baby/toddler trolleys that are secured (£1 coin ones) 200yds from parking so you have to carry kids to trolley on way to shop then on way back, you need to leave your kids in the car to take the trolley back for your £1 back! (Morrisons!!)

LOVE family toilets where you can get pram in and has 2 toilets so you and toddler can pee at same time.

HATE ridiculous pricing for family attractions. Also why do they have to increase the prices during the holidays when they are likely to get more business anyway?! Just seems greedy.

Agree with posts about chicken nuggets etc - kids menus are generally all the same rubbish. Also, they should never have a picture of the desserts on the menu as it makes it even more difficult trying to get a toddler to choose between nuggets and macaroni when they want the ice cream that looks so good! (unless that's just my toddler!)

Have to say though, family friendly is a hard thing to achieve as each family is looking for a different thing. Eg. familys with 3 infants want different facilities to family's with 2 teenagers, or single parent family's want different pricing than 2 parent family's.