"you can't compare your life as a successful businesswoman, married with a child, with excellent written communication skills and a keen brain to someone at the other end of the spectrum. Not at all....I think the problem is that you do class everyone with autism as one voice/ group. You always use 'we', when you are actually talking about you when describing your experiences."
Givemesleep, if I had excellent written communication skills, you wouldn't be complaining about them, would you. Think about it.
If you actually look, I've said time after time that experiences vary. When I'm doing advisory work, I ask them to bring in people from a LFA perspective to make sure we have a representative point of view. Time after time I explain that not all people experience things as I do. You're 'hearing' it in a way I don't ever intend to portray.
Maybe it's because I have a comms disability. Maybe what you're saying is that I need to write in legal-speak every single time I say something on here and end it with a disclaimer of some sort? But what I'm doing is advocating a little for the other people I know and all of their experiences - and I know of so very, very many who have explained their experiences to me in whatever ways they can - from as wide a part of the spectrum as we can possibly manage. I may not do a perfect job, but at least I try. No, it won't be every child's experience but I'm not here as the mumsnet expert and there are tons of parents here who are perfectly capable of saying what it's like in the lives of their low functioning child and who can help me correct things I might get wrong.
I'm trying for you, and for your family, and for all the future you's too. I'm trying to get employers to offer employment, schools to offer proper help, services to offer proper support and money. I'm trying to do that for every single person on the autism spectrum in this job. Poems like the one that were published make that so much harder for your children to get a job, to get respect, to get accepted by people. Because it portrays them as a tragedy and nothing more than that.
And at the same time I've got a husband who's just had a brain haemorrhage and is still getting over it and who so nearly died, and I've just lost my two lovely dogs, one of which was my support-dog. And my advocate's child has just died so I don't even have her help any more. I'm so close to the edge, I really am. But here I am having to be told how lucky I am. I didn't feel that lucky when I tried suicide, or when I survived the sexual assault. It didn't feel that lucky to spend most of my life being bullied. It didn't seem that lucky at all. AAre you saying that because I found a solution after decades of effort that gave me some quality of life, I should be discounted as being nothing like people with Real Problems?
People shouldn't have to walk on eggshells around me, and I've never felt they do. But neither can any of us just say anything we like about autism generally on a UK message board, because it really does infringe the UK disability laws if we put things on here that mean that effectively mumsnet is then promoting a hostile or degrading environment for people with a disability. Plenty of sites in the world where you can do so, but not on the UK ones. That's not me making up a law, that is the law.
There are thousands of messages on here saying how tough autism can be, and I've written some of them too. None of them offend me, Givemesleep. None of those go near to breaking laws. I know how tough it is. I have an ASD child, as you might remember in all of this, and I have looked after a parent who was institutionalised on a regular basis because their behaviour was so extreme and so dangerous. I have arthritis that means I'm in constant pain, I have endometriosis that means I'm facing a major operation soon, I have to have support each day from people to do the things I do. It's interesting that you see my life as lucky. Want to swap? I didn't think so.
What worries me is general published propaganda of any sort about all autism being awful. If it's wrong for me to use the word "we", how come it's ok for that poem to generalise? The OP poem did say that autism causes loathing - another word for disgust. It did also call parents mostly cowards. Is that how you want to see yourself and your fellow board members here? I don't think it was respectful to you, your situation or the courage or anyone on this board.
I'm sorry that you read what I write and see me as someone detached from your situation.
I use my business stuff to give us the money and the resources to help people with autism. I'm used to being mocked for it and told that I get things wrong.
Yes I do get things wrong . You know why? Because I'm on the autism spectrum.
I've been awake since 3 wondering if people are actually asking me to leave mumsnet. I won't know unless you say. I will if it'll make you feel better. Out of respect for you.