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Original poster

sorry to bother you..

55 replies

Evesmama · 20/04/2005 13:36

but i have a question someone might be able to help me with?

i am suffering at the minute with depression gp has diagnosed it as pnd, but i sometimes think otherwise.

something that has been on my mind recently, is how when i was young, i had to do things a certain number of times(touch wood, turn light on/off)7 normally and would also feel the need to 'take' things with me when we went out for day with school etc ie:toilet roll tube etc...dont laugh, im not making this up, just ive started being a bit like this again now..having to do things a certain number of times and re checking everything.

im sorry if this sounds like total tosh, but just wondered if it is symtomatic of anything any of you know about and could it be linked to my depression

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Original poster
Evesmama · 20/04/2005 14:24

habit..i think, but sometimes i feel like i cant stop it?sounds daft i know.
also get feeling like today in town, when walking up high st i suddenly thought..this looks odd, something is going to happen if i walk this way??, but thought no, im always thinking things like this and nothing ever happens, so carried on..and nothing did happen??

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Original poster
Evesmama · 20/04/2005 14:24

god typing this just confirms to me how crazy i am!

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WigWamBam · 20/04/2005 14:25

Basically, if your levels of thyroxine are only OK because the Thyroid Stimulating Hormone is having to work too hard, then you won't find that out unless you have a full screen. The TSH is what stimulates production of Thyroxine, if your thyroxine level is low then your body makes more and more TSH to try and make more Thyroxine. So you can show as having a normal thyroxine level, even though you haven't really.

That's still as clear as mud, isn't it!

mummytosteven · 20/04/2005 14:26

like I said earlier one the thread tho, virtually everyone does a bit of weird stuff/has unpleasant thoughts etc - like avoiding cracks on the pavement type of thing when you are a kid. the key thing is whether you think it's interfering with your life - if you are comfortable with doing the odd weird thing, then you can always just accept that as being a quirk, (obviously keep an eye out for if it gets worse).

WigWamBam · 20/04/2005 14:27

You're not crazy. OCD is more common than you would think. It's unwanted thoughts and compulsions; it's not craziness.

Original poster
Evesmama · 20/04/2005 14:30

no it is clear, just very technical!

i do have the normal obsessions like checking ive locked the door ten times when going out and checking baby gate a million times before i go to bed, but these have just started happening recently and are worrying me a little

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WigWamBam · 20/04/2005 14:33

If they're worrying you then you should do something about them. See your GP, or whoever it is you see for your ads, and tell them. They may be able to adjust or change your medication to help.

Original poster
Evesmama · 20/04/2005 14:35

im due to go to doc for ad's in around a week, so with speak to him about it.

also, i startedd a new pill 2 weeks ago, could this be conflicting??doc said it should be ok as very similar to old one..sorry..you both know so much..i am a total dim wit

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mummytosteven · 20/04/2005 14:37

only know bout it as have done tons of reading on it. don't think that there is likely to be any conflict between the Pill and SSRIs.

Original poster
Evesmama · 20/04/2005 14:44

i think should research it a bit moreas i dont need something else to stress about!, need to get it sorted

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WigWamBam · 20/04/2005 14:44

I haven't heard of there being a problem with the Pill and SSRIs, but you could always check with the GP when you see him.

Original poster
Evesmama · 20/04/2005 14:47

he said not and pharmacist checked, but seemed to be around same time??maybe not, maybe just noticing it more?

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Original poster
Evesmama · 21/04/2005 13:47

anyone around??

i've got my CPN coming round any minute, i forgot she was coming..do you think she might be able to help??

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Original poster
Evesmama · 21/04/2005 13:51

anyone??
dont want to mention it and she think im stupid!

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WigWamBam · 21/04/2005 14:06

She won't think you're stupid at all. It can't hurt to ask her.

Original poster
Evesmama · 22/04/2005 21:25

told her and we just skated over the subject really??
she said it wasnt a problem unless it effected my every day life??
but it is..thats why i mentioned it to her??

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coppertop · 22/04/2005 21:32

Oh no. I don't have any experience or advice but didn't want to leave your thread without posting, EM. Hopefully someone else will have some ideas. xx

Original poster
Evesmama · 22/04/2005 21:35

thankyou coppertop

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TheRealMrsF · 22/04/2005 23:49

OK...I missed this!!!

I have a CPN too...i was diagnosed 8 years ago with PND...and gradually over time more has been diagnosed.

I have depression,anxiety OBSSESSIVE tendancies ....Binge eating compulsions..... and thri=ough my boys being dx'd with asperger's syndrome...i have come to believe and treat myseldf as being AS too...as i had a shit childhood- and realise now that like you- i was the way i am now ...long b4 kids!!!

i was told that having a baby (is this your 1st)...can trigger supressed mental health such as OCD etc.

MUMMY2STEVEN.....please bear with me- i have loads to tell you...please don't think i am ignoring you!!!

mummytosteven · 23/04/2005 21:48

evesmama - did you then tell the CPN that you were telling her because it was starting to affect your everyday life, or did you just feel a bit put off by that and not say any more? just trying to get a feel for whether you feel your CPN was stonewalling you, or whether it's more a comminucations glitch?

whatever, I think it would help if you read some more about OCD as 1)there is good self help books out there, which, if you are only mildly affected, you might be able to work things through yourself anyway - sometimes just understanding what the problem is can help you feel a bit better, rather than just thinking you are "mad"/"the only one" going thru this and 2)at the very least it will help you get a feel for what sort of treatment might be appropriate - i.e. so you can say you want CBT rather than inner child counselling for example.

I've drastically cut down on my mnetting - my msn is [email protected] if you want to contact me.

mummytosteven · 23/04/2005 21:49

no problem the realmrsF - sometimes it takes me a while to do a proper reply to e-mails etc :-)

WigWamBam · 23/04/2005 21:59

I think you need to make it clear that it is affecting your life, and you want to do something about it before it gets any worse. Is your GP sympathetic, can you see him about it?

Original poster
Evesmama · 24/04/2005 21:33

hi girls, thankyou for the replys

yes therealMrsF, i do only have one and dont think id be able to do it again!
i do think 'a lot' about the abuse as a child more so since having dd, so that may be the major contribution to the way i am..i took a bunch of tablets when i was 16, but the truth still didnt come out till i was almost 18 and have been feeling like that 16 year old kid again recently

MTS i 'did' say to her one of my big concerns at the minute was this, but weither i didnt put this across strongly enough, i couldnt say..i think i did?

wigwambam i am gunna speak to my doc at the end of this week when my ad's run out and ask him about the full thyroid test.
my cpn is great about other things and is really good??, maybe she was just trying to stop me from worrying about anything extra at the moment??

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TheRealMrsF · 25/04/2005 11:24

evesmama...CAT me if you want to... i had 'issues' in my childhood and believe that led me to be very 'casual' in my early adult relationships...leading to a very frightening night with 2 men.

thia in turn lead to me having many difficuilties which i 'mask' by being very chatty etc and obsessions about many things....but the biggest 'shock' to me was the strong emotions following the birth of my first child.

basically- i vowed to him when he was only hours old...whilst i was alone in hospital that i would do my best to make sure he never feels like i do -BECAUSE of ME.....as for years i blamed my parents wholey for everything...and it turns out now that they weren't as much to blame as i thought- but because they didn't understand me i reacted by blaming them-
For my boys however I strive to make them secure and as confident as they can be...and so far even my 11 yr old son wants hugs and cuddles....which by 9 i chose to not ask for to my parents...as there was too much expected in return for affection.
I must state here that i was not ever 'sexually abused' in the sense that my body was not abused- but i was exposed to things that a child should not- and that lead to my 'misunderstanding' what was appropriate for me as a young adult.

I am willing to talk freely about this on MN- if it is helpful to others to raed my thoughts- however- i also believe that to some this may not be the appropriate place to discuss it??

My 'recovery' has been via 10 years of various counsellin/mental health support- and by telling people what happened-and gradually getting to where i am now which is that "I had the right to say NO"

Original poster
Evesmama · 25/04/2005 21:37

TheRealMrsF, thanks for that
you sound as though youve been through the mill yourself..its so scary that almost everyone to speak to has gone though something similar..just wish i could hold certain people accountable for their actions which have lead to shocking reprucutions in our own adult lives

had driving test today and found myself sitting in car before leaving test centre touching all my finger tips with my thumb and couldnt start till id completed my 'set'

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