Mail on Sunday Magazine

[lottiejenkins]

I found this article today..........I thought it was very moving,,,, what a decision that lady made... dont think i could do it though!
www.mailonsunday.co.uk/pages/you/article.html?in_article_id=522925&in_page_id=1908

I did think that Tinadawns post was very nice. And she made some interesting points. But I still can't change the way I fel about JH. The more I see her, and the R&J programme only confirmed , the more I find her chilling.

Now just lets hang on Mamazon,

I am not at all sure that JH says that how she felt is general.

To me she made it pretty clear that this was how she felt and how she reacted, I am not sure she generalised at all.

Your statement that she was "dishonest" needs some evidence to back it up.

Would you get up off your bum and tell M'lord that JH is dishonest?

Her alleged views about Imi being an "animal" would be grounds for a sec 47 at the least, or not?

Foster care should be a last resort.

Not some happy alternative.

With the greatest respect foster carers talk about 'their' chidren.

My disabled son is and always will be my son.

Foster care is not some lovey dovey alternative to me.

So it worked for JH- sow what?

Giving up my son (Which is what she has done with her daiughter) is not. nor ever will be an option for me.

I'd rather walk repeatedly over hot coals than have someone else describe my son as 'theirs'.

Good on you yurt

It works for you

As it does for most people.

Fine JH couldn't cope. Finer she was happy to have someone else call her daughter theirs.

For most people that is a last resort.

And it shouldn't be presented in any other way.

Just a question?

Have you had Jonkat banned for not agreeing with you??

How could we/I have jonkat banned?

You tell me?

I have a big day tomorrow so i am off to kip now.

Catch you all tomorrow

Yours in parenthood

Hairy handed TT

She never said Immie was an animal, she said she FELT like she was looking after and animal, that is very different. The dr said her brain was keeping her alive and that she had no intelligence. How was she supposed to know any different?? She believed what she was told

It was her last resort, she couldn't cope, she was thinking irrationally, how far do you all want to have gone??

If we had heard in the news, mother kills disabled daughter, then it explained for 5 months her child had screamed and fitted and the mother had no support, was exhausted......would the reactions here be any different??

PLease don't.

Can't you stick to your dating website?

This is real life (rather than an oh so interesting discussion) for most of us.

And no-none of us can ban anyone. And Mnet HQ seem to enjoy these robust discussions. God knows why they give me a headache.

Was that to me?

I wish this was all in one thread

No reffering to your child as an animal or implying you think of them as such would not be grounds for a section 47 assesment.

whilst being morally questionable it would not suggest significant harm or distress being casued.

If you were find to treat your child as an animal then yes this would result in an assesment.

As for these views being alleged, i am sure if i had the time or inclination to go searching i could find the quote, but i can't. i do however have a feeling it has been copied onto on of these threads already.

i didn;'t state she was dishonest. My post said that she has inferred that she is speaking on behalf of n parents.
I say so because of her constant comments about most parents feeling the same way.

yurt?

Are you talking to me?

I don't think I have a dating website.

I need to know

a: if I have one - news to me

B: how do you know......

Please help me.

LOL

i fear this has become less of a debate and more of a baiting session to you Talies, which is a shame.
although i have found some of your posts frustrating i enjoy having my view challenged.

Anyway, i am off to court tomorrow (yeap back there again) so i am going to leave you all to it.
I will catch up with the thread tomorrow.

night

Nope MR it was to Talies Steady on girls.

The person posting on radical social worker about residential care vs fostering was called Rhys as well.

Nice video of an engine in the snow too btw. Although I prefer the ice road or whatever its called. Real hairy handed truckers there.

• again I give you Talies

2shoes

I'm here to give JH some support, on the support site, by counterbalancing some of the bigotry I've read here.

Supporting her by telling the truth about her from my personal knowledge of the situation and the people involved.

I don't find anything supportive for JH in the ill informed critisism she's had on this 'support' site.

JH has taken a profoundly brave decision, it's a shame all our minds can't reach as far as hers.

Immie is gorgeous, Tania has no wings and Julia has not abandoned her daughter.

The result is two happy families.

Well done Julia.
Well done Tania.

jonkat

Tania has updated her blog, is good reading (for me as she is saying what I have been saying)

mamazon,

I see your off to court, again, tomorrow.

Perhaps it might help you if I remind you that the phrase in the CA is "At risk of significant harm" not "significant harm or distress being casued"

The words "at risk" acuratley reflect Immie's situation in Julia's own words to her GP.

S47 would then apply.

I'm off for 2 days now so I'll catch up on Friday.

Have fun, Oh and remember to weight Julia carefully before you cook her, you wouldn't want your meat too rare I'm sure.

jonkat

I am in court on a personal matter Jonkat.

i was not quoting teh childrens act, i was answering a question. Im afraid i do not feel the need to read it each time i am asked if it applies.

as for the meat - im afraid you lost me love.

I have judged Jh on the information she has provided us with.
Im afraid i have found some of her statements upsetting, obviously you know this woman personally and she must clealry be misrepresneted by her ghost writer?
because you paint a picture of a wonderful caring and compassionate woman, her articles and exceprts from teh book describe a shallow and selfish woman who considered her child to be less worthy than her pfb.

And it is not her decision to place her daughter into care that has guided me to that conclusion

oh and if you read the post correctly i was asked if Jh saying that she thought of Imogen as an animal was cause for an assesment under sec 47 of the CA.

What JH is alleged to have said to her GP was that she had had thoughts of killing Imogen.

This would indeed be enough to reffer her to SS for assesment and to get her the help and support she needed.
Instead the GP described her some anti D's and told her that most parents feel like this

Mamazon

So, you have such a clear understanding of the law that, if you work in Children's Services, you need to read the CA before offering comment on it's most basic tenets.

You feel no need to get it right when offering your advice..........how very professional !!

I'm glad that at last you have admitted that you have "judged" Julia and that on nothing more that newspaper articles, heavily edited. Frankly in your profession you really should know better.

Unless that is you believe everything you read in the papers, including the Daily Mail, about your profession ?

You don't work in Nottingham do you ?

jonkat

jonkat will you stop baiting mamazon.

Actually in this case I don't agree with Tania. She is also presenting it as an 'alternative' when I think their arrangement - which does work for them- is very unusual.

The foster carers I've met who have disabled children have them for short periods before the children pass for adoption (and that has included a child as disabled as Immie). Or they haven't been as dedicated as Tania.

Foster care means that the family unit is split. Julia herself has said that she is not Immie's mother.

That's not a 'solution' that many parents can stomach.

It might be Julia's but I think presenting it as an easy to access alternative arrangement is very misleading.

Foster care should always be a last resort.

And to use an example here. Whilst I find the way that Tania writes about Immie and the other disabled children she looks after (or is that' her' disabled children- see it gets murky- although I know she has adopted one child) I for example do not like the way a certain foster carer has written about disabled children on this site.

I wouldn't want my child anywhere near someone who thinks that parents are revolted by their disabled children. NOt for an afternoon - let alone for long term care.

But if my child was up for fostering- well I wouldn't have a choice as to who they ended up with would I?

Hello yurt and good morning all,

Now we see the real level of debate, here.

Trawling the web finding a page I had set up to pull my god daughters leg.

My, you must feel good about yourself.

I think anyone could now understand my reluctance to let some people on here know anything about me.

Parents support site?

Are you having a laugh or what?

Belated best wishes to Mamazon, have a good day in court, if such a thing is possible.