Primary School Auties 10: Summer and beyond 2022

[LightTripper]

Thread 10.

Ooops, sorry, filled up the last thread without noticing - here we are at THREAD 10!! (How did that happen?)

This is a thread for the parents & carers of children with additional needs. Most of us have autistic/ADHD children in primary school, but anybody is welcome to join us to chat x

Links to previous threads below.

Thread 1
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3080753-DS-with-ASD-starting-school-Sept-2018-I-am-feeling-overwhelmed
Thread 2
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3451020-Reception-auties-2018-19-thread-2
Thread 3
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3628263-Auties-transition-to-Year-1-thread-3
Thread 4
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3748449-Primary-school-Auties-into-2020-thread-4
Thread 5
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3953023-Primary-school-auties-summer-and-beyond-thread-5?pg=1
Thread 6
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/4166833-Primary-school-auties-spring-2021-and-beyond-thread-6?pg=1
Thread 7
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/4303826-Primary-school-auties-summer-and-the-new-academic-year-thread-7
Thread 8
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/4422100-Primary-school-auties-step-into-Christmas-and-the-New-Year-thread-8
Thread 9
www.mumsnet.com/talk/special_needs/4502988-Primary-school-auties-thread-9-spring-summer-2022

Orchard games - shopping list etc - can be good.

Urgh awful weekend here.

DS has a bit of a sniffle. Looking pale and sorry for himself with a crusty nose but, you know, hardly deaths door. No temp etc. a few sneezes here and there.

so from Thursday non stop meltdowns, throwing himself on the floor , kicking, wailing etc. last night DH actually said do we need to take him to a and e? Anyone else’s DC like this when even a bit unwell? Obviously he can’t tell us what’s wrong but it seems such an overreaction. Generally when you feel rubbish you just want to sit and chill, don’t you? On Friday eve I actually had to call DH to chivvy him home from work because by 7 pm he was absolutely breaking me and DD was also getting distraught. I couldn’t console him or even get him off the kitchen floor!

generally he doesn’t have meltdowns but god almighty after this weekend my absolute respect goes to any parents who have this frequently.

And I’m hoping this is down to his cold and not just some new behaviour which has crossed my mind!!!

Oh sorry Carrie that sounds tough. I am lucky DS becomes rather angelic when he is ill.

DS's behaviour is rather erratic at the moment. The mood swings keep taking me by surprise.

No man flu Dimples, you lucky sod!! 🤣. Ha, he can join forces with DS. Any reason why??

If ds is properly poorly then he lies quietly on the sofa or me. Sounds rough carrie, I hope he perks up soon.

Likewise, dimples, I hope ds settles down.

Up and down morning at school here. Hopefully better tomorrow.

Nightmare Carrie! Hope he calms soon. If ds is really unwell he gets very calm, but milder illness (like a cold) he would definitely have a shorter temper and find self soothing activities more difficult.

Sorry about the mood swings open. Has anything triggered it?

We ok here. Ds is going on a school trip tomorrow and needs a packed lunch. I literally have no idea what to put in it apart from some cheese and onion hula hoops and a bit of fruit!

Food of the Gods Liv!! Whatever he will enjoy 🙂. I’ve seen far worse!

That’s a more exotic selection than ours would be liv

Hi all, got locked out of account, back again now!

thanks for the advice and links re differences with DH. Definitely helpful to think about it from other perspectives but probably something we will also just have to learn to live with a bit. Think I need to be better at saying when I appreciate something he does etc too (eg especially a lot of the pick ups and drop offs and practical admin that’s not in English).

had a first visit from the portage equivalent, she was nice although I get the sense she didn’t have a huge depth of knowledge. Had not heard of ABA (whcih we are no longer doing, but mentioned) or Hanen, and did not immediately have any suggestions for eating or sleeping. She will come back at a dinner time soon to observe more and we will see how it goes. I don’t love having an outsider around so need to get used to that.

@carriebradshawwithlessshoes yep we have the same with illness. I think partly bc DD tends to spike a fever at the drop of a hat so I guess that leaves her feeling really rubbish, but the meltdowns are off the charts and coupled with the fever (39-40) we have found ourselves in A&e a few times for reassurance that it’s just another virus. They are usually patient though, also A&e different here, there’s a separate sort of out of hours Gp type thing so threshold feels lower.

weekend was cold and wet but DD was keen to go outside. She has started running to her nursery (the mainstream one she is finishing soon), it’s about 5 min away (obviously we go with her not alone in case that wasn’t clear!). she’s done this 2 weekends in a row - really strange as we didn’t think she really liked it there atm. She’s a mystery as ever!!

Hope that your DS enjoys the trip Liv.

Ahna it will probably take a little while to feel comfortable with them. It's a bit disappointing that they weren't able to advise yet but perhaps they're trying to get a better understanding of her first.

Carrie hope that the illness has passed

Well I’ve had a monumentally shit afternoon. Done everything I shouldn’t have done in response to ds. Disappointed in myself and still furious with him. Looking forward to bedtime tbh

I volunteered to help on a school drip with DS last week, and for all that the school always want you to send "healthy snacks" if they ask for a snack to be sent in (no crisps, no chocolate), the lunch was a white bread cheese sandwich, a carton of juice, a packet of crisps, a penguin bar and an apple (where most of the kids ignored the apple). Which I thought was quite funny given we'd never be encouraged to send any of that in with them!

So Hula-Hoops and some fruit sounds quite good really if he'd actually eat the fruit!

Really hope DS is feeling better @carriebradshawwithlessshoes ... if he is still upset is it worth getting him distressed just in case it's an ear infection or he's got sinus pressure or something else uncomfortable that he can't communicate? Of course a sore throat and crusty nose is already not sensory fun, so maybe it's "just" that. Hope he's feeling much better soon and things calm down for you all in any case!

On the plus side, he ate a whole bag of crisps this afternoon. I don’t think he’s ever eaten them before. Not sure what’s going on, wish it was healthier food but grateful that he’s branching out for now.

Just saw your message @openupmyeagereyes - try not to beat yourself up - we all have days like that. Even NT adults need help with regulation sometimes - or just a good night's sleep! Hope everyone gets a good night and DS wakes up a bit easier to manage tomorrow (if not sooner!)

I hate days like that open. I hope bedtime comes quickly for you!

Ahna hopefully the next visit will be better.

That sounds like the kind of packed lunches we got from school in the 90s light!

So I ended up putting in a juice box, two packs of crisps, grape, blueberries and a small box of grated cheese. Amazingly he ate the lot! Including the cheese which was definitely a shot in the dark.

This morning was quite challenging as he wanted me to come on the class trip with him and was refusing to get dressed or go on the bus. I'm ashamed to say there was a lot of bribery involved.
We must have looked like a right pair waiting for the bus too. He asked for fish fingers for breakfast and they just came out the oven when the bus called, so we took the plate with us to the pick up point and he ate them while we we're waiting!

Thanks. Still mulling a bit but should feel better if I get a decent sleep. Tomorrow’s a new day.

Isn’t it the way re. packed lunches. They tell parents not to include unhealthy food but then serve sweet desserts with school meals. Ridiculous.

Open we have definitely all been there. Sorry that it was a rubbish afternoon and I hope that tomorrow is better.

@openupmyeagereyes hope today is a better day. Also had a shocker yesterday eve and like you reacted every way I didn’t want to. It sucks

Open hope all is better today.

The pudding thing came up at a meeting at dd's school once. They keep them on the menu because it is a good way to make sure children, who may only have the school meal in a day, get the extra calories they need.

Ds didn't really want to go to school again this morning. This half of the term is always the hardest.

I’m not against them having puddings liv, I just think they shouldn’t make a fuss about packed lunches that have a chocolate biscuit or whatever.

Luckily for us it’s never been an issue. I’ve just been able to put in what ds will eat.

Bloody tipping down again here, thoroughly fed up with it.

We have also succumbed to the lurgy. DS barely slept last night and school called this morning saying he really wasn't himself. The upside is we've been snuggling on the sofa this afternoon watching the football.
I agree about packed lunches, I don't mind puddings at school either but it makes it a bit redundant to be obsessed about healthy food in lunchboxes. DS has the same thing every day anyway!
I'm fed up with the rain now too. Can't wait for 3.5 weeks time and school and work to wind down so we can hibernate!

Sorry you’re poorly Uno, hope you’re better soon.

Much better day here, thankfully, though yesterday really was my fault. I’m obviously feeling a lot less reactive and emotional today - hormones and tiredness most likely.

Ds is not having a particularly settled week at school. We seem to go one step forward but then one back.

So is it because if the new moon??!! We've had an awful week this week too. It's been suggested many times previously that DC behaviour is worse with new moon but I've not taken it seriously.

Having a HORREDOUS week too.