Primary school auties step into Christmas and the New Year - thread 8

[openupmyeagereyes]

New thread.

This is the continuation of the thread for parents / carers of autistic children / children with additional needs. Most of us are parents of children in year 1 / year 2.

Links to old threads

Thread 1 - www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3080753-DS-with-ASD-starting-school-Sept-2018-I-am-feeling-overwhelmed

Thread 2 - www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3451020-Reception-auties-2018-19-thread-2

Thread 3 - www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3628263-Auties-transition-to-Year-1-thread-3

Thread 4 - www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3748449-Primary-school-Auties-into-2020-thread-4

Thread 5 - www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3953023-Primary-school-auties-summer-and-beyond-thread-5?pg=1

Thread 6 - www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/4166833-Primary-school-auties-spring-2021-and-beyond-thread-6?pg=1

Thread 7 -
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/4303826-Primary-school-auties-summer-and-the-new-academic-year-thread-7

My feeling is that in the next decade there will be a swing towards a more Scandinavian style of schooling. Sitting at a desk for hours is just not beneficial for young children who learn best through play.

Complicated indeed Danni!

It's great that your DS is able to communicate so much without speech Carrie. Haven't heard anything re EEG yet but consultant said that it normally takes a week for him to get the results so that would be this Friday. Hopefully I'll hear something next week.

Open your conversation with your DS was very heart warming.

Also meant to say hope that you are right Open about education changing. DD has a July birthday and l am thinking of delaying her school start as I did DS's (although she is v different to DS) as I just think that they're way too young

Ds has is IQ assessed when he was about 3/4. Even though he didn't participate in all of it she could see he has average to above average IQ but like others have said, spiked profile and needs a lot of adjustments to be able to learn.

Carrie I think the biggest hurdle for us in sending ds to special school was getting over our own ideas that he should be in mainstream.

Magrat our special school sounds similar. Jealous of the horse riding though!

Well done ds for going in open!

Danni that numberplate thing would have annoyed me too. It would be the kind of thing ds would be capable of too, sometimes I think he has super human strength!

Dimples good luck with the hearing, glad they've agreed to an Ed Psych appointment.

Those are such amazing conversations @carriebradshawwithlessshoesand @openupmyeagereyes.

I think one thing our kids will have is the ability to share their feelings with us, in whatever way they can. Hopefully if he wants to communicate with speech he will be able to one day @carrie: or to get so fluent/confident with other methods that speaking doesn't feel like such a big deal to him.

I suspect there are a lot of NT kids who would not be able to share those kinds of feelings with their parents for whatever reasons, so it just proves what brilliant parents you are being!

It would be nice to think that Light, but he often refuses to tell us anything so I'm not sure it's true, unfortunately. We will keep working on it.

Ds managed about 1 hour and 45 minutes at school. He's a bit highly strung today so good considering.

open and to anybody else who have sleep issues. I’ve found a website that sells this milk.

Might be snake oil, but the reviews are good.

It has valerian in it and some of the reviews mentions adhd autism and helps them to sleep better etc.

It comes in chocolate / vanilla flavour etc.

sleepwellmilk.com/product/chocolate/

It’s called sleep well milk x

I’m going to trial it and buy 3 cartons for ds, and 3 cartons for my nephew (he’s a terrible terrible sleeper! Worse than ds! I know he’s a baby but my sister hasn’t slept for a year)

They sell the milk in Holland and Barrett might nip to town tomorrow.

danni I’m sure I’ve come across this before. I don’t think ds would drink it sadly.

I’m putting it in a drip next to ds bed! 🤣

Mention Chocolate to him and it’s sold!

Let us know how you go danni and it might be worth trying to get ds to take it...

Oooo let me know danni !

I ordered 3 cartons for ds to try, only £4.95. And got my nephew some, it’s free postage so not a lot to lose if it’s a waste of money!

Might give a couple to DH he is doing my head in at the moment 🤣🤣🤣

How so, carrie?

Ds has broken a new record. He stayed asleep for 49 minutes. And now he’s wide awake.

What the FUCK 🤦🏻‍♀️

I hope to god that’s not him awake for the night.. I hadn’t even got to bed!

Oh no Danni!

Said half in jest Open though DH does generally drive me mad a lot! It’s a whole new thread in itself! Disorganised. Doesn’t listen to what I tell him then says I haven’t told him. Complains about trivialities. Bring on Danni’s milkshake (laced with something!!). I often think I’ve got things more under control and calm when he’s at work!

I am having a night away with 2 girlfriends tomorrow. Not done this for years, they are old school friends so been friends over 30 years. We are staying in a hotel 30 mins away.

DH behaving like I’m emigrating to Australia on a permanent basis!!

danni I HOPE ds went back to bed! Awake at 3:15 here 😴

carrie interesting. Do you think he has adhd too? Sounds like there’s something going on.

Ds went back to sleep at 10.30. Thank god!

I’m on the war path again today, a path I’m finding myself on quite frequently of late! 🤣

So ds passenger assistant changed again 6 weeks ago to a lady who has been given a permanent contract for ds, so she’s his full time PA now. (She’s nice enough)

BUT she does another school run before ds, (only made possible by ds being collected at 9am and dropped to school for 9.30am! She couldn’t do it if he started school at the normal time as the timings wouldn’t work, so cashing in on ds being on reduced hours!) she’s done her other run for 3 years… it’s another special school and she drops the lad off with his taxi at 8.50am then has to get to my house for 9am from the other lads special school (local one that ds couldn’t go to, piss take!),

Ds taxi comes to me for 9am (she’s not late) we then get him harnessed in and his bags in the car and we wait for the passenger assistant whose other taxi drops her onto my front, then they dash ds to school.

Well it became apparent from the beginning she couldn’t be here for 9am. It was 9.03am or 9.04am which even just 3 or 4 minutes after the expected time is a big deal as ds school is 20 miles away and he has to be there for 9.30am. It’s busy in a morning and a few times during the last 6 weeks ds has been 5 or so minutes late for school. (Which isn’t a big deal in the grand scheme of things, but it is to me as it’s not acceptable. He’s never been late for school, and now his PA’s other commitments are affecting ds)

Twice last week she didn’t get here until 9.07 / 9.08am which made him about 7 minutes late to school…..and this morning 9.13am.

Not a fucking chance!

She said her other student had an issue and then they hit traffic at the main roundabout and she got here as quick as she could.

I complained to the taxi last week and she told the office I wasn’t happy and they said it can’t be helped she has another run and she is ds permanent PA now and basically for me to put up and shut up! Which I said no I’m not happy to just ‘accept’ any old shit!

Well this morning when she was 13 minutes late, my head came off.

I said why is it acceptable for the other student to get to school on time but ds having to be regularly late?

I’ve emailed his teacher and the taxi company. Im livid. Once again, ds is everyone’s after thought.

He would of been at least 15 minutes late this morning.

I’d rather take him myself. At least he’ll be on time!

So I’m now waiting for them to drop ds back off to me at 1.30 and see what they’ve got to say.

It’s not going to keep happening, at all.

They can UNpermanent her off ds run! And get someone who can be here ON TIME!

As if I’m just going to accept ds getting to school 5/10/15 minutes late a day because she’s getting the other boy before him to school on time. No bloody way.

danni it's really not acceptable, I would be angry too. Especially since ds does not do a full day anyway. Hopefully they will resolve it for you.

Ds is starting to swim on a Tuesday morning from next week, aswell as the Thursday. So twice a week now. Which is good! Both hour long sessions, his teacher said he’s made outstanding progress in his swimming and yesterday he swam the full length of the pool and back with a float on his own (it’s only shoulder deep water) so they’ve increased his swimming to twice a week like the other children (I wasn’t aware the others even got twice a week) and on a Tuesday he’s going to have 1 child they choose (one that doesn’t wind ds up) to go in the pool with him to model good behaviour to him.

Also on the 21st, so from a week on Monday ds hours will go up to 2pm. So he’ll do 9.30-2pm every day.

I wrote a long message about taxi situation but deleted it before I posted. I was ranting! Long story short I need to speak to taxi Monday morning especially to let her know ds will be staying later the week after.

Ds was 15 mins late this morning as I thought he would be, taxi never said anything to me at 1.30 as though it’s fine to just rock up late like that and not mention it to his mum!

His teacher told me! I told his teacher I’m not impressed. He said it’s acceptable when coming from another county now and again due to distance but that’s for traffic or tailbacks due to accidents but not because his PA is doing other jobs first. He agreed with me for a change and told me to complain and it’s not fair to ds.