Auties transition to Year 1 - thread 3

[LightTripper]

This is the continuation of the thread for parents and carers of autistic children in reception year at school, going into Year 1 in the autumn. All welcome (also parents with older or younger children who want to ask questions or share their wisdom!)

Welcome!

Well done with the visuals Harley. They look great.
A friend of mine has a mini version for her son which he keeps on a key ring attached to his trousers so he can remind himself while he's out and about.

liv it’s great. I would like to hear more about their recommendations and how changes are going to be implemented. I think that Boris has promised extra funds for schools too?

*@liv and @liv*potter i have read that an official says that the money won't make any difference if the systems don't change. They are also looking at the send and socail care onbudsman investigating complaints and in LA's and School as they are completely impartial.

Thank you @liv i have done a mini version for out in public too. I just need to get a hole punch so i can attach it to a key ring. Really hoping it helps and works.

The @liv is supposed to say @open dont know how that happed 🤦‍♀️

Open I'm currently reading the report. It's fascinating!
publications.parliament.uk/pa/cm201920/cmselect/cmeduc/20/20.pdf

Yes Harley that's exactly what the report is saying. Additional funding won't fix it if the system won't change.

I don’t trust Boris one iota, from what I can tell he just says what he thinks people want to hear but without any real back up. So much has to change across so many agencies to get support for the vast array of difficulties and that all takes time, thought and money. Oh, and a lack of greed, because helping kids with SEN is not and should not be, a money making business. Unfortunately there are few opportunities where selfless people are given the powers, money and time to actually implement anything meaningful and either nothing gets done, or sometimes worse, a “tick” in a box somewhere to alleviate some “director of child services” guilt gets done but with no real meaningful impact. It’s devastating. I really think that our kids only hope is having parents who are able to skill themselves up and help support those supporting the kids, like schools, to know what to do. If you get a knowledgable professional helping along the way it’s a bonus, but so much of their work has to be the role of educating and skilling up the parents and school workers that if either of those are unable to engage or don’t engage them it’s the families that suffer. And I say that from within the professional system - just utterly depressing. Sigh.

Speaking of parents skilling themselves up, its time I delved into the world of social stories. Do any of you have one or know a place to find one about playing with others when they don’t follow your rules or they change the game? Ds really struggling with his little brother starting to say “no” and thought it’s a good opportunity to go through this with him before it makes too much impact at school.

Jeb I don’t trust Boris either but hopefully he will stand by some of the things he’s pledged. Of course if there’s another GE who knows what will happen.

Thanks for the full report liv. I’ll try and read it.

Sorry Jeb, I just looked through my social story books and there’s nothing like that. They are mostly based on turn taking.

I'll have a look Jeb as we do have one book of social stories.

It is a kind of turn taking I think (or at least, that's how we do it with DD: "right, what's your idea - OK, let's do that - now let's do my idea, then your idea again" - or if she's with a friend we try to get them to combine ("Right, DD wants to play dens, X wants to play snow leopards, so can the den be your snow leopard cave?") That kind of thing seems to work but it's been a bit of a slow process!

So our social stories book isn't very good at this either, just very basic turn taking.

Will you be My Friend by Molly Potter might be better. Nothing exactly right but a lot of things nearly there. I've posted the cover, index and a "nearly there" page.

Sorry 'Jeb' I haven't got any social storybid as yo share. I think I will try our the one suggested by 'Light' as DD definitely struggles with making friends.

Read the BBC article the other day and the summary of the report last night. Sadly I'm bit surprised by their findings. A vast amount of SN kids are out if school because mainstream schools can't support them and the parents are turned down fur EHCPs or left waiting in limbo whilst waiting for tribunals etc.

In my job I come across so many SN and/or ASD kids who've developed serious anxiety/MH issues due to lack of support and not fitting in (=school refusal/too ill and/or anxious to attend) so end up out of school for 'medical reasons'. Makes me so worried about DD's future. Particularly for secondary school, which is when things usually fall apart.

Last day at school today before half term!

Apologies for typos, phone keeps putting if instead of 'of' and bit instead of 'not'

Harley how are the visuals going?

danni how are things with you?

Who else haven’t we heard from recently?

Half term is going ok here. I took him to visit the in-laws yesterday and today we’re visiting his cousins. He loves seeing them and I often have to bribe him to leave. Hopefully not today but he has a new found interest in Roblox that I will exploit if I have to 😬

We’ve had some great moments too. Ds helped me make biscuits on Wednesday and it was the most involved in baking he’s ever been. We also did a Twinkl Halloween cvc cut and paste activity and ds correctly spelled the words bat, cat, hat, rat, web, pot, log & bug and stuck the letters on

LittleSwede I missed your post.

It’s something I worry about too as ds has refused school on a number of occasions despite the school making lots of adjustments for him. It’s not perfect all the time, of course, but by and large they do a great job.

The reality is there are not enough specialist schools any more. So many of the MLD schools were closed and there is a dearth of places that will suit a fairly bright child who struggles in mainstream.

I know that there’s a chance we will have to homeschool at some point and with this in mind I’ve been enjoying reading about homeschooling as a way to scaffold ds’ learning now but also to give me the tools and confidence should it ever be necessary for us in the future. I’m currently reading The Brave Learner.

open we're also aware that Home Schooling might be possibility (or even necessity!) further down the road if school doesn't work out (making a note of that book!). Did even look at what the options are in Sweden if the UK system becomes too rigid for DD's needs. There seems to be the same struggle for support over there but with no uniform, teachers by first name and a generally less authoritative approach, it may be an option. Although so far DD seems to like the predictability of uniform and the structure of the day.

Although DD had only had one day off (ill) I am anticipating refusals as the novelty of it all wears off. Following her day off on Monday it has been a case of 'don't want to go to school mummy', every morning. Have manged to gently lead her out of house and she hasn't physically refused (yet!) so got through this week. How much cajoling is resonable though? I don't think I could carry her into school if she was crying and refusing to move.

And totally agree to there being a lack of schools suitable for fairly bright children who cant be in mainstream. We have a lovely SN school in our village but there is no way they would ever take DD (need EHCP anyway) as it is for MLD only.

Something that I find frustating is that professionals (and people in the 'NT world@ general) don't seem to make a link between early diagnosis and a need for support. Yes, DD can present quite NT, but I don't think she would have been given a diagnosis at the young age of 3 year and 3 months if she wasn't quite obviously ASD to the various people involved in diagnosing her. So clearly she need extra support, she has a recognised disability on paper. Argh! rant over!

Meant to say 'NT world' in general, in other words those who aren't familiar with ASD/SN.

I have carried ds into school crying a few times and it’s awful. I wouldn’t do it now. Even though he did calm down after a little while it’s a horrible start to the day for both of you. It becomes impossible anyway as they get older and bigger.

open I made DD go into nursery crying several times last year and it was so hard. I couldn't physically carry her now anyway!

Ds has READ his first few words today. I’m so proud

Yay Open, that's wonderful news!!

That's brilliant open!

Thank you. So exciting

That is fantastic open!