son been suspended twice this week

[diamondmoon]

My son is 7 and I have had problems with his behaviour for a while but he was ok at school. He has got worse since July being very hyper had s horrendous summer hols and hol club could not control him so got kicked out. He started the junior school and each day been getting worse. Started off just not listening talking will not sit down. He has anger outbursts so kicks the kids lunch time he has to stay in and ignoring staff and running wild. He flips out very quick. He not concentrating and doing no work. On Monday he threw a chair at his teacher so suspended and today completely out of control and they couldn't calm in so suspended again. I going to take him to doctor as feel something not right but his dad my ex thinks he just being naughty. What if he gets expelled ?? He behaving very different to rest of kids so how is that normal? He also never cries at school when head etc telling him off

ruths my son who is as yet undiagnosed is just the same. He seems to have a bad bout of outbursts at the beginning/end of each school year. This has made it very tricky to know what support is needed because he can be fine for most of the school year. I think this is also why he is still undiagnosed at the age of 12. I have always convinced myself he is okay because the behaviour always settles down. I have only recently started pushing for a diagnosis. Have you found anything that helps in these tricky periods?

diamondmoon I would definitely start pushing for assessments now. My son's issues started in year 4 at school although he had temper outbursts at home for a few years previous. My son's self esteem is now in tatters and so wish I had been more proactive earlier on but tbh I just didn't know what to do, I trusted the school too much to do the right thing.

I still waiting for apt to be assessed to rule out medical but he may get expelled on Monday as he got worse

It's so tough isn't it, you have my sympathies. The last three years have left me a nervous wreck waiting for that phone call from the school.

Maybe if he does get expelled it will at least show that extra support is needed and might actually lead to action being taken a bit quicker.

My son only had one official suspension but was sent home several times which I now know are considered to be illegal exclusions. This has meant that we have muddled along without the school ever having to put any support in place because they would always just call me to collect him. It made there life easier but made mine a nightmare.

Thanks! He was fine in infants this is new out of character at school. He managed to escape from school yesterday and run down the rd. He been suspended 6 times since he started year 3

My son's school issues began in year 4 although he had angry outbursts at home for a few years previous. I still don't really understand why he coped so well until then.

Do you know what it is that triggers your son? We have always struggled to really get to the root of my son's triggers.

It's so hard but just know you are not alone, there are lots of us struggling through similar issues.

Hi dippyegg I wish I could tell you that there is a happy ever after but sadly I can't. My son was given a fixed term exclusion for 2 days on Tuesday last week because he punched a boy on his nose so hard that it bled quite badly. I was devastated because I am continually talking to him about ways to manage his anger and that hitting is never acceptable but right now he is like a boiling pot and it doesn't take too much to make him explode. This child is one of many who taunt my son everyday because he is socially and emotionally immature. The school say they are dealing with it but to be honest right now my son has such a low self-esteem that he errupts quite easily. He is really struggling to manage his emotions and I often find him in tears when he feels like he has been treated unjustly - the tears come first (usually) and then the anger. This year he has really struggled adjusting to year 5 and while he can have some amazingly good days which surprise everyone, on average he is breaking the school rules at least twice a week, sometimes more. This year he has started to kick the wall, table, chair when angry/upset. Obviously I have had to punish him for his unacceptable behaviour so I have taken away his D.S console and laptop (which he loves) but I have also bought more books on managing anger and making friends and we have been reading through those together. I have made a real effort to let him know how much I love him and I have tried to make sure I spend quality time alone with him (which isn't easy as I have another younger son with ASD) and two older children (one doing her GCSE's). I really wish I could make this better for him because it breaks my heart to see him so fragile. I am hoping that now he has had the formal fixed term exclusion there should be enough evidence to apply for an EHCP which would mean he would get more support in school. dippy egg I would push for a diagnosis because this would help when your son is struggling to cope at the start/end of the year. He may even be able to get extra time in exams but above all the school would have to recognise that he isn't just being naughty and they would have to put support in place for him. Good luck.

Gosh lots of that sounds very familiar I think the low self esteem and sadness is more heartbreaking and hard to deal with than the anger.

DS has just started high school. On the whole he is doing well he hasn't erupted at school yet but 2-3 times at home he has blown up. He has had a few issues with bullying, which quite often seems to be bantering that he just can't keep up with.

Juniors was when it fell apart for is too. It is so common at this stage.
Feel for you and yes yes to assessments sooner rather than later!

In think there's clearly a lot going on with your DS. But sounds to me like a negative vicious cycle has begun.
It sounds like your DS is upping the ante because he knows the result is exclusion? Has so,etching happened in school to affect him? Is there bullying no one knows nothing about and he wants out?

I know my DS had trouble explaining what had made him angry and that's how it escalated.