Insanity, fast labours aren't all they're cracked up to be. Its such a huge shock to the system and of my 3 labours, the most painful.
Ds1 was three blooming painful days, stuck back to back and ended up with an epidural (was told it was either that or a cs, due to my muscles refusing to relax) syntocin and then ventouse.
Ds2 was a lovely relaxed labour, iirc around 15 hours long and got to hospital with less than an hour before he was born - just G&A with him and he's always been the easiest of my 3 dcs.
Dd was breech up until the afternoon before, turned by consultant, spent all night sitting bolt upright to stop her turning again (she was a real spinner and constantly moving from ceph to breech). Induced mid morning the next day. Had first dose, went for a walk to the post office, came back, still in the side room where they do observations and inductions ( basically just an empty room with two bed divided by a curtain in) first contraction started and it went from 0-60 in about half a second. Poor woman on the other side of the curtain looked really scared (it was her first). Huge shock, no pain relief and no-one would listen to me. Dh was stressing because they wouldn't listen to him telling them that I'd done this twice before and if I said I was ready to push then I was ready to push. Mw goes on break, another one walks in with a syringe of muscle relaxant, twigs straight away, agrees to examine me and all of a sudden there's two mws plus people careering into the room with various trolleys and equipment. Dd arrived about half a minute later torpedo stylee, shot out on to the bed complete with her sac and waters, which promptly burst, leaving her in the caul and everyone else soaking wet! 
Quite a dramatic entrance really - and she hasn't changed much since then.
Ninja, sorry to hear about all the illness in your house at the moment, hope everyone's better soon.