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Sleep

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Original poster

10 wk old won't sleep at 7pm - advice wanted.

42 replies

p1umpudding · 14/08/2008 22:44

I can't get my 10 week old DD to go down at 7pm. I bathe her at 5.30, then get her dressed for bed and give her a feed in a dark and quiet room, but then come 7pm, she's just not ready for bed. When she does eventually go off, I wake her at 11pm, feed and then she wakes at 7am (that's the good part).

She simply won't sleep during the day either and is overtired by 7pm. She's exclusively breastfed and I just don't know what to do as my husband and I just want a few hours together in the evening - help and advice wanted.

OP posts:

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MatNanPlus · 14/08/2008 23:17

Must say when i am looking after littlies i eat before 5pm as no guarentee of quiet time after 6pm or before 9pm but she is only this small once so do enjoy it, soon she will be tucked up by 7pm and you will miss the late evening snuggles :0

PussinJimmyChoos · 14/08/2008 23:19

P1um - you can have time with DH as well - put DD on your chest alseep and watch a movie, pausing it to coo over how gorgeous your little baby is and of course, to munch on choc!!

DillyTanty · 14/08/2008 23:20

see, the funny thing is that i remember that period as being the most beautiful quality time with dh and dd together. he loved it, dd lying on his shoulder, me on his lap snoozing etc. [nostalgic]

PussinJimmyChoos · 14/08/2008 23:27

I'm ttc no 2 and after reading this, I want another bundle to cuddle asap!!

themildmanneredjanitor · 14/08/2008 23:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PussinJimmyChoos · 14/08/2008 23:40

I'm not going to read a single parenting book this time either!!!

You know, I've got foreign friends who are very much of the mentality and expectation that they won't get much of a life when the baby is born and its amazing how much more settled and chilled they are with motherhood compared to what I was like. I really think something can be learned from that....

susiecutiebananas · 14/08/2008 23:42

just to pick up on the dark room thing... I don't think any teeny babies like dark rooms. My DD just wanted to be wherever we were, were the action was! She was happiest, on the sofa, or on one of us, with the TV or radio on, or listening to us chatting. Even now she sleeps - or at least stays in her cot- all night so long as her night light is on. If it is off then I usually hear from her sometime in the night

Oh, i really do remember how you are feeling now. Its SO exhuasting. You just want a nice long break in the evening, after you've been at it all day with her. Then all night too ( well, you don't lucky devil ) All that said, I'd stil love those times back again! can't believe i'm saying it!!

susiecutiebananas · 14/08/2008 23:46

pussinchoos- I know just what you mean with that! I'm fairly sure that 2nd time round, whilst there is of course the added stresses of having two children, I'll be so much more relaxed in my approach to all of these things.. you know the big thigs at the early months, sleep, feeding 'routines' etc... Go with the flow more, accept it all more. Be happy with just experiencing a tiny baby again! Oh, I think i'm getting really broody again!!!

PussinJimmyChoos · 14/08/2008 23:48

Susie We start ttc no 2 this month! Fingers x'd!! Read a thread on here earlier that has stressed me out as people who conceived quick with their first, seemed to take a lot longer with no 2 and I'm in a flap as we took three months with DS...DH has warned me not to get obsessed but....

ThatBigGermanPrison · 14/08/2008 23:50

Sleeping from 7pm is not a very natural thing for an exclusivly breast fed 10 week old. Basbies that age cluster feed in the evenings, stocking up for the night, and she is probably wakeful because she wants to be fed.

susiecutiebananas · 15/08/2008 00:48

nah PIJC, don't get in a flap. There just is never any rhyme or reason to these things honestly. i've a friend who had 3 years IVF for number 1, and conceived Number 2 when number 1 was 3 months old!!!!! They were SO shocked, as you can imagine

Actually, thats another point for you PLum ALL babies are so different, and with their own personalities, wants and needs. Just because your friends are being economical with the truth getting their LO's to go to bed at 7pm, doesn't mean you are a failure in the slightest! It simply means that your baby is different. She is not interested in going to bed, for her own reasons/to have her needs met. So don't be so hard on yourself in thinking you are a failure.

miabl2 · 16/08/2008 12:17

Both my children have gone to sleep at 7 in the evening and I followed Gina Ford (takes cover) Its probably the fact that there is no sleep during the day that is making your baby so difficult to settle at night. I would work on the daytime sleeps first and see if it makes a difference. Theres nothing wrong with wanting to spend evening with your hubbie.

Becky77 · 19/08/2008 08:57

I don't think all her friends are lying! I've been putting my baby to bed at 7pm since she was born... OK so for the first 8 weeks I went to bed with her (in a darkened room)... Now she gets a big boob feed in bed at 7pm as usual and I sneak out for an hour or two of adult time... She was waking at 11pm, 2am and 5am but this last week has been sleeping through until 3am and then we get up at 7am... She is 10 weeks on Thursday.

I started going to bed at 7pm because I needed the sleep and the longer we were in the bedroom the better to catch those hours!

katiepotatie · 19/08/2008 09:02

My dd had no set bed time until she was 14 months old,( and only now i've stopped breastfeeding does she sleep through the night). Enjoy the time you have with her, she is only little for such a short period time.

Ebb · 19/08/2008 12:19

My last charge slept thru the night 7pm til 7.15am at 10wks ( dropped the dream feed as she'd only take an ounce) but she was formula fed and a 'sleepy' baby right from day 1. However my own DS is 3months old and does exactly the same as your DD. He won't settle until 9.30pm and sometimes as late as 11pm. It's such hard work and I long for the day when I can eat a leisurely dinner and have some me time! But I tell myself that he's only little for such a short time and I make the most of all the cuddles. When he smiles up at me, it makes it all worth while so I just stick a film on, put my feet up, snuggle him in and enjoy. If you'd have said I'd have been doing that a few months ago I would have laughed. (Me being very experienced Nanny and all my babies have slept thru from very young or at least settled at 6.30pm/7pm. They were all FF and I'm BF which I think does make a difference.)

MrsMattie · 19/08/2008 12:21

Your expectations are way too high for such a young baby. the fact she is sleeping for such a long stretch is amazing in itself. Keep going with a relaxing wind down routine in the evening but don't expect miracles.

ELB1 · 20/08/2008 23:12

Some of your friends may be telling the truth. My DD went to sleep at 7pm from 8 weeks old and still does now at 10 mths. It's nice and some of my friends were jealous, but I did it because she was tired - that's all. However she didn't sleep til 7am without night feeds until she was nearly 7 mths, so as some of these guys have said - you are lucky in some respects.
Also - it's very true that you only get this precious time once with your baby, and having them with you is soooo lovely. I actually started to miss that time with her when she started to go to bed - so much so that we started TTC - and got PG straight away . DD2 is due two days after DD1s 1st birthday!
Other thought if you and DH want a bit of time together is whether you have anyone who would look after your baby after you have fed her at 7pm until her next feed at 11pm while you go out? Even if it's for a walk, or to the pub where you can be phoned and back in a few minutes, it might be a nice respite?

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