3 yo getting out of bed repeatedly at the crack of dawn - any advice?

[Mothership2025]

Our toddler has been 100% awake and coming into our room repeatedly for hours in the dawn hours - helppp?!!

Background - until this week, our almost-4-year old was sleeping solidly through the night. He doesn’t nap and has been in his own bed since he was 2.5. We’ve never co-slept and he loves his bed. He normally conks out independently and happily after a solid bedtime routine and he used to sleep through loud noises with no bother. He shares a room with his sister who (finally) sleeps through, it felt like we were just getting to a good place with sleep BUT…

The past 5 nights he has woken up in the small hours (eg 4am) and come into our room. We gently return him to bed. Ten mins later, he’s back, still wide awake. Again, returned. Later, back again… and so on… for HOURS. This morning he woke up at 4.30 and played out this farce until morning. I probably took him back to bed close to 20 times. We are all completely shattered and bless him he has bags under his tiny eyes.

He doesn’t seem to know why he’s waking up, and we have no idea why he can’t get back to sleep again - he isn’t scared or hungry or hot or cold. No noise is bothering him. It’s a complete mystery!

So what should we do?? Keep returning him quietly and patiently to bed and slowly go insane from the early starts? Sleep by his bed to quash the waking as soon as it happens? Anyone else experienced this in the late toddler stages?? Thanks so much - all answers appreciated! X

You know as children get older they need less sleep. You need to make his bedtime later than 7pm. The average window is 10-13hrs a day, with some needing a bit less and others a bit more.

7 pm to 4:30am is 9.5hrs

I used to love my kids getting into bed with me for cuddles. They grow up so quick

My DD just wanted a little company. I used to offer a drink of water and a bit of oatcake in case she was hungry (never anything else) and chatted quietly for a while. It was never a fast turnaround and if I rushed it, she would get upset and it took even longer. Once she was settled again I would leave her to fall asleep. She wasn't ever a great sleeper!

Did you brush her teeth again after that?

Do you brush your teeth teeth after every meal and snack you have?

I brush my teeth between eating and sleeping always yes.

I didn’t ask that.

Time for a gro clock and reward/bribery for staying in bed until the clock wakes up! Worked for both of mine.

Rather than a later bedtime I'd suggest maybe an earlier one (just for now) or even a nap. If he's waking at 4:30am and not going back to sleep at all then his usual 7pm bedtime may be too late for him. He'll be very tired if he's done that for several days in a row. My 4 year old could only manage being awake around 12 hours and your 3 year old is having way longer days than that.

Can you give him a little car nap to help him get to his usual bedtime just to put him back on track or let him go to bed a bit earlier to catch up some sleep?

Any other question was irrelevant as presumably your child was going back to sleep after eating. Being asleep with the mouth closed increases the breeding of bacteria in the mouth. Plus sleeping itself naturally lowers your saliva production, which temporarily reduces your mouth's ability to wash away bacteria and neutralize acid. So brushing your teeth after lunch is not as important as when you’re about to sleep.

Mine was a consistent 7pm bedtime until about 3 1/2 until it became clear he didn’t need 12hr sleep anymore. That’s probably what’s happening here. I’ve got tons of 3/4 year olds in my life. The ones that go bed at 7pm are the 5am risers. So the 4/4:30 rises is just likely that he’s now running out of sleep pressure at that time