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Original poster

If you had a baby in the 80s/90s what did you do about naps/bedtime?

120 replies

RedRobyn24 · 17/09/2025 09:29

I presume wake windows weren’t a thing and obviously apps like Huckleberry which calculated wake windows etc were not around

I have my second child (9 months) and her sleep is exactly the same as my first only this time we have the school run to consider. I’m just struggling with a routine, I want to be able to take her to baby & toddler play groups and classes which are predominantly in the morning, more than anything so I can get out the house because I’m lonely, but she needs to sleep in the morning she’s exhausted and she’s already having to wait until 9 after I’ve dropped her sister off.

What did mums do before? I feel like I’m trying to make sleep better but perhaps I am getting too caught up in wake windows and nap length. I just want her to be happy/content but also go to sleep at 7/7:30 and be fairly settled.

I must be getting it all wrong AGAIN

OP posts:
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friskery · 17/09/2025 18:40

Can you walk to school or baby groups and she can sleep in the buggy for half an hours?

The after lunch do a proper nap at home.

If she doesn't nap well after lunch she can have another little buggy nap at 3pm on the school run.

This is the nap 'routine' I have for all my babies as a childminder and it seems to work!

Coffeeishot · 17/09/2025 18:52

Btowngirl · 17/09/2025 16:32

My mum gave us all hungry baby milk and when I quizzed her as to why, it dawned on her there was no reason other than the HV telling her it would keep us content for longer 😂 i get the logic but it’s so different to how!

edit as i said hungry baby food meaning milk!

Edited
Show quote history

It was to fill the babies so they slept ! my mum and mil said put some rusk in the night time bottle 😳

Btowngirl · 17/09/2025 19:00

Coffeeishot · 17/09/2025 18:52

It was to fill the babies so they slept ! my mum and mil said put some rusk in the night time bottle 😳

Show quote history

I think it just made me greedy 🥲😂

Eviebeans · 17/09/2025 19:09

One born in 83, one in 86
and one in 91
no sleep apps or sleep windows
lots of books
Went to lots of different groups- walked every-where - had a big silver cross pram and baby might fall asleep on the way - I’d be able to have a cup of tea and a chat until they woke up

Coffeeishot · 17/09/2025 19:10

Btowngirl · 17/09/2025 19:00

I think it just made me greedy 🥲😂

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HA 😂

SarBe · 17/09/2025 19:15

Wtaf is a wake window??? 🤣
Mine slept when they slept and fed when they fed 😂

GiftWrappedSuburbanDreams · 17/09/2025 19:44

This is so interesting to read! I've been wondering exactly the same thing OP. I have a baby who's a few months old and as I had no idea what I was doing, I did some research about sleep. I use wake windows roughly and also look at his sleepy cues. We have a nice routine for naps and bedtime that works around my baby. But some people I know who raised their kids in the 90's/00's think I do things strangely. My baby needs the sleep he has in the day. He doesn't just sleep when he's tired. He's very alert and won't just fall asleep if I'm out and about, he's too nosey! 😁 He'd have to be absolutely on the floor exhausted to be able to sleep anywhere. And it would affect the night very badly for us, which isnt worth it. So we work around naps and bedtime. I get funny sideways glances sometimes, but I don't care. It's what works for my baby. It will pass.
I was a 90s baby and my mum finds all of it really interesting btw. She actually sees the benefits of how we do things for my baby anyway.
Just my perspective as a 2020's mum. 😁

FMc208 · 17/09/2025 19:47

Nevertooearlyforsanta · 17/09/2025 11:25

I had two in the 90s and one in the 2000s and used the same techniques. I am a recent grandma, the difference is striking, until the point the sleep consultant was called in and then it was very similar.

So first child I found around three months, was not sleeping as well as I wanted, would not go down to sleep without a lot of rocking etc, not practical, especially as I fell pg with number two around that time.

Sleep trained number 1 (ds) by letting him cry to sleep. Took one week, actually more like a few days. Cried altogether for 1.5 hours the first night and then 1 the second, and it reduced significantly the following nights.

With number 2 (did) from birth I had a clearer structure for her sleep. After the first week or when sleeps were three a day (bottle fed so easier to do ime) I always put her in a different room, so upstairs, in a darkish room. So there was a distinct ..time to sleep…and not using the living room etc. Although, noise was kept the same, I wanted them to sleep in an environment with noises etc.

When at home they went down for their naps, generally around the same time of day, but when very young babies I also relied on sleep cues.

There were no sound machines, sleep windows, sling sleeping or even taking them out in a pram/car to get them to sleep. Because dd was put down awake from birth, she learnt to self soothe. I know the studies would say that’s not possible from a young age, but it worked with all three of my children. They all slept a dream really!

God this is so unbelievably sad to read.

ThatMauveReader · 17/09/2025 19:50

What fresh hell is a wake window and nap schedule? 1992 mum here, my son worked around me. I went back to work four months after he was born. He slept at nursery and was awake in the evening until he went to bed around 7/7:30 and slept through. Looking back it all seemed fairly easy and chill, mainly because didn’t have any bloody apps and windows 🤣

Bankholidayworries · 17/09/2025 19:52

I gave the baby a short nap in the car on the school run and then woke them up when we arrived at a baby group. Went to the baby group, gave them lunch and then left for them to again fall asleep in the car. If fine sleeping in car I left them in there or transferred once we got home.

user4534 · 17/09/2025 19:58

I had my baby more recently but I did find a great routine at that age was a nap at 9ish for 30/45 minutes. Then wake them up to go to a baby group. Home for lunch and a longer nap between 12:30-2:30 ish. By 15months they dropped the first nap and just kept the lunchtime, which gave the whole morning free.

Agree with other posters though - it’s fine to go to a baby group with a sleeping baby! Baby groups are for mums more than babies!

MikeRafone · 17/09/2025 20:13

I have grandchildren

one is set to sleep by the huckleberry app, he is one and has been very easy to put to bed & self settles without crying etc.

mine just sleep when they needed, dd1 mostly had naps in the pram and slept 7-7 at night. Dd2 slept in the pram after the school run or nodded of in pram on the way home from school run, slept 6-7 mostly

it’s what they’d now call “ organic” 😂😉 but tbh neither slept more than an hour for naps in the day after about 5 months and both slept well at night - I was just very lucky. My only stickler was I put them in the back garden to sleep a lot and they spent a lot of time outside

HillbillyBackstroke · 17/09/2025 20:19

I’m always amazed my the amount of mums from my parents’ generation whose babies slept all through the night!

I don’t think I know any babies under about 9 months who do that

MikeRafone · 17/09/2025 20:24

HillbillyBackstroke · 17/09/2025 20:19

I’m always amazed my the amount of mums from my parents’ generation whose babies slept all through the night!

I don’t think I know any babies under about 9 months who do that

Possibly due to being weaned at 4/5 months, they sleep soundly after tea & a bottle. Whereas now weaning is finger lead and probably less food more milk at 6 months, so they are hungry? Just guessing

Cakeandcardio · 17/09/2025 20:27

I have a baby now. Never use any apps because I just cannot get my head around how a baby works with what an app says. I just bundle her into the pram with a blanket and off we go. If she falls asleep on the way to a class, I might give her 10 mins and go in later. Or if she is tired in the class and getting irritated then I might leave the class a bit early. If I had time and felt she would nap then I might leave earlier for school run and go a walk so she naps then

Timeforabitofpeace · 17/09/2025 20:31

My dim memories!!
As tiny ones they slept a lot. 9/10 weeks to 9/12 months, twice a day. Roughly. Up at 7 or 7.30 , slept around 10-11 or 10-10.30 , then again around 1-3. Tricky to keep awake after 6-7. At a certain point, they dropped the morning nap and slept a bit earlier, then managed until 1.

I think, anyway. Be cautious about older women’s memory, though. Including mine. We all like to remember what we think we remember!

herbalteabag · 17/09/2025 20:33

First for me was 2000 and second a few years later. No apps or whatever else you said, and I have never heard of nap windows.
I didn't try to have a routine as such, just went with the flow. Let them sleep when they wanted to, unless I had to go somewhere or wanted to go somewhere, and then I picked them up and put them in the pram or car. Youngest drove us all mental by being awake all night for what seemed like forever but it was just a phase, like most things.

Soontobe60 · 17/09/2025 20:40

RedRobyn24 · 17/09/2025 09:29

I presume wake windows weren’t a thing and obviously apps like Huckleberry which calculated wake windows etc were not around

I have my second child (9 months) and her sleep is exactly the same as my first only this time we have the school run to consider. I’m just struggling with a routine, I want to be able to take her to baby & toddler play groups and classes which are predominantly in the morning, more than anything so I can get out the house because I’m lonely, but she needs to sleep in the morning she’s exhausted and she’s already having to wait until 9 after I’ve dropped her sister off.

What did mums do before? I feel like I’m trying to make sleep better but perhaps I am getting too caught up in wake windows and nap length. I just want her to be happy/content but also go to sleep at 7/7:30 and be fairly settled.

I must be getting it all wrong AGAIN

Because we didn’t have unfettered access to the internet when my DD1 was born in the 80s, I just left her to fall asleep wherever she was. 🙄

DLin4 · 17/09/2025 20:43

I had my first in the late 1990s and our latest just last year! I’ve loved having all the extra information and apps etc this time around as there was hardly anything when I had a baby that seemed to scream in pain for hours at a time except a small paragraph in the baby text books on colic and a health visitor that told me my baby was just ‘angry’ as he didn’t even have any tears 😞 My 2nd was the most content baby you could imagine and if you’ve got a baby like she was then really don’t have to worry about nap schedules etc as she’d just sleep wherever and whenever she needed. My younger ones are. not like that however and huckleberry has been great for our baby. Going out at nap times would put her out of kilter for days and she got very overwhelmed with baby groups in yhe early days but now she’s not older it’s a lot easier as only had 1 nap a day. Just play it by ear, try the groups and around nap times etc and if your baby’s happy with that then carry on and if works better on the structured routine then go with that, it’s just trial and error

Original poster
RedRobyn24 · 17/09/2025 20:46

HillbillyBackstroke · 17/09/2025 20:19

I’m always amazed my the amount of mums from my parents’ generation whose babies slept all through the night!

I don’t think I know any babies under about 9 months who do that

this is sooo true 🤣

OP posts:
EatSleepDreamRepeat · 17/09/2025 20:48

2013 and 2016 kids here. My eldest slept in her pushchair if we went out. Didn't clock watch. If she had a later sleep she stayed up later that night, all good. If she was asleep at playgroup I left her in the pushchair and chatted to the other mums.

My youngest never slept more than 15/20 mins at once in the day. Slept midnight - 5am pretty consistently from about 3 months with a couple of hours either before or after. Chucked him in the sling with 2.5 YO in buggy and got on with life. Later found out he's autistic and sleeps differently to pretty much every other child I've ever met. No point fighting the natural order.

Original poster
RedRobyn24 · 17/09/2025 20:51

friskery · 17/09/2025 18:40

Can you walk to school or baby groups and she can sleep in the buggy for half an hours?

The after lunch do a proper nap at home.

If she doesn't nap well after lunch she can have another little buggy nap at 3pm on the school run.

This is the nap 'routine' I have for all my babies as a childminder and it seems to work!

No unfortunately! We live rurally and I need to drive then walk a very short way to get my eldest daughter to school. Anywhere I want to go is in the car, except for walking the dog which is straight out into farm land.

OP posts:
jumpingthehighjump · 17/09/2025 20:51

HillbillyBackstroke · 17/09/2025 20:19

I’m always amazed my the amount of mums from my parents’ generation whose babies slept all through the night!

I don’t think I know any babies under about 9 months who do that

Mine did at 12 weeks!
Both
Years ago mind

MikeRafone · 17/09/2025 20:55

Never use any apps because I just cannot get my head around how a baby works with what an app says

it’s the app working with what the baby does

Starbri8 · 17/09/2025 21:13

ReignOfError · 17/09/2025 11:25

Mine were born in 79 and 81, and I never had a daytime routine. I had a full size Silver Cross pram, and I walked anywhere I wanted to go and they either slept or didn’t. When they were too big for that, they went into a pushchair.

At home, they fell asleep if they were tired, mostly on my lap, and I’d shift them to a mat on the floor/pram/cot if I needed to.

If we went out in the evening, they would sleep anywhere - friends’ beds, carrycot under the table when they were small enough, two restaurant chairs shoved together.

I have a lovely photo of one of them standing up, leaning on a large footstool somewhere, absolutely fast asleep.

I dare say if I was a good mother, I’d have been rushing to rescue him, not wandering off looking for a camera. But I never read the bloody ‘how to know you’re a shit parent’ books, though, and we’ve all survived.

I was born in 1979, my girls are 5& 9 , I parent just like this I listened to my Mum ! I was so anti parenting books and apps that when DD2 stopped sleeping my brother in law asked us was she due a leap?? He was shocked that we had two kids and didn’t know what a leap was ….. I had to google it.